[disappearing_act]

So i wrote a week ago, that i had cut myself and it was bleeding a good bit. Well that same day, i went to the hospital. I told someone, and they called help, and sent me to inpatient treatment. I was suppose to get out two days ago, but the doctor was very hesitant. Now i am in intensive outpatient therapy for two weeks because the doctor said that i really need it to work through my problems. They made me sign a contract stating i would not harm myself while in the intensive program, and if i feel like i am to call them. I am feeling like that right now, and i don't know what to do. I don't know what i should do, i can't go back into inpatient, i just got out today!~ *sigh*

[DoggyBonz]

Sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time. Have you read the threads at the top of the page about things to do when you are feeling this way. Also, I have never been in a treatment program but does calling necessarily mean that you will be hospitalized again? I imagine that it is pretty common for people to leave and feel the way you are and that they are trained for these types of calls. You were in a "safe" place for 2 weeks and now you are out on your own. I'm sure it is pretty natural to feel that way. I have a good friend who went through an intensive eating disorder program for bulimia and the days before she left she felt pretty good about maintaining. Within like 36 hours of getting home those urges were there and she did call someone to talk about it. There is a difference between wanting to cut and cutting.
Calling them might be a great step in letting them and yourself know that you are in the process of changing your behavior. Right now you have a choice, don't wait until it's too late and that choice is taken away from you b/c you caused yourself harm.

Keep us posted...

[Kiya]

also, there is an SI hotline (it may be just US dunno where you are) 1-8oo-366-8288
which i think is "1800 don't cut"