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Poohbah
Member Since May 2013
Posts: 1,190
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#41
Quote:
I know you will never tell us and you dont have to tell us your big secrets. I just dont like u suffering. I own that i cant sit by and watchbyour suffering. It is very strange that your family wants you to stay away from your mother and again it is all of their fault not yours. Everything you talk about is how everyone else is doing wrong things to you and you are the total victim in every story. I am sorry you suffer like this. Maybe after writing all of this i am realizing that i am projecting my feelings about a person in my life unto you. I will work on that and avoid your posts if at all possible. |
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Travelinglady
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 48,300
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#42
I agree that it is best that we avoid posts that are triggering to us. That doesn't necessarily mean we don't care for the poster, but we have to look after our own psychological health.
My mother was still upset way into old age about how her parents treated her. We just don't know all the circumstances often times and for whatever reasons the person just doesn't feel like/isn't psychologically able to tell us all the details. I have to say it's validating for me to hear other people talk about how my mother was difficult to deal with. (She died a year ago at age 90.) |
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IowaFarmGal
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Blknblu
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
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#43
Hi folks,
I've been hanging out mostly in the Psychotherapy forum recently, trying to deal with my great disappointment it didn't fix me and turn me into a wonderful person who could handle the problems and pitfalls of life with no sweat! Seriously -- semi-seriously. My cognitive side knows that's ridiculous, my emotional side not so much. So I had missed the discussion earlier in this thread about getting toward the end of life, and appreciated what folks said. For the last several months I've been clearing out the accumulation in my house, my home for the last 30 years, preparing to move across the country near my my son and his family. I'm not needing assisted living or nursing home care yet, but there are days when I definitely feel it coming on. The clearing out has just been awful, overshadowing any happiness or excitement about moving to something different. Looking back, some things turned out better than I ever would have expected, some things turned out terrible, worse than I ever expected. My husband and a friend kept on keeping on, until they were gone. I guess I'll try to do that, too. |
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IowaFarmGal, Nammu, Travelinglady
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Blknblu, Travelinglady
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 48,300
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#44
I had to downsize items when we moved to a smaller house--and now I have a bunch of my mom's stuff to deal with. (She died in February at the age of 90.)
I still like to accumulate--especially books. I think I'll need to live to 115 to get them all read! |
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IowaFarmGal
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Blknblu
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,905
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#45
The vast majority of my stuff is in boxes from when I moved in with mum. Sometimes I think I could just get rid of all of it, then I think when she dies I have to move and will need it.....but I have about 20 -30 boxes of books. Most are already read but they were good books. Many of them non fiction reference books. Even if you can google stuff now a days there's just something nice about going to the shelf and having in your hand a whole book.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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IowaFarmGal, Travelinglady
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Blknblu, IowaFarmGal
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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#46
I agree. I just can't imagine not actually having a book in hand. I even have bookshelves with books on them in the garage! And books in boxes under the bed...
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Nammu
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Blknblu, Nammu
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 48,300
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#47
Anybody besides me just have a flip phone? I tried smart phones and didn't like them!
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Blknblu
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
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#48
No, no flip phone. My landline is a big hulk that turns speech into captions so I can read it. I finally broke down and got a smart phone to text on. Only a few people have my number and know it's text only....but I get lots of robo calls! I never answer and they keep calling. I do get nice pics of the grandkids tho!
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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Angelique67, IowaFarmGal, Travelinglady
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IFG
Member Since May 2012
Location: Iowa
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#49
I have a bunch of stuff I should go through. Bags of mail from the table from various times that build up. Cabinets the mice have wrecked. There's stuff in the barn and shop too that need to be gone through. I don't know what to do. The future scares me. Every time something breaks there's no money to fix it. I don't even have any money to bury me when I die and I don't know what will happen to my son. He will have no one.
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: new england
Posts: 7,733
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#50
__________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: new england
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#51
same experience.
__________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
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#52
The Skeezyks doesn't answer the phone.
__________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
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#53
I don't either. That's what the machine is for.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: new england
Posts: 7,733
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#54
I get few calls and only answer those I know/want to.
I miss the days of letters...correspondence …. __________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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#55
I don't usually answer unless I recognize the caller or business place, since we have caller ID.
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Member
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: California
Posts: 81
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#56
Love this! The green thing.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 48,300
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#57
I'm sure glad I wasn't in the nursing home being rehabilitated when this virus hit. I was there in January--so I was sort of cutting close. I'd had elective surgery earlier that month. I wouldn't get it now either.
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Nammu, wing, winter4me
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Angelique67
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 22,122
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#58
They have really gotten serious about the ppe and the distancing here. There haven't been any new cases and hopefully they'll let us outside again. You definitely don't want to be in a nursing home during an outbreak. It's torture to be confined to your bed with 2 other women you don't get along with in the room. And the uncertainty of what will happen, with no nicotine replacement therapy. If they'd just let us vape in our rooms there'd be much more harmony and less hatred.
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Travelinglady, wing
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Travelinglady
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metamorphosist
Member Since Oct 2010
Location: Southern US
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#59
I miss going out to have coffee or lunch. Luckily my son and his gf, who live with us, like playing Mahjonng or I’d be watching TV all day. I wish I could get motivated to clean but I spend a lot of time on FB, and here for that matter. I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing. I looked up all the cousins I grew up with and reconnected. May go to the first family reunion in decades this summer.
A high school classmate who lived across the street from me growing up, got in touch, and has almost convinced me to go to my first HS reunion ever. It’s the same day, time and place as the family reunion!! |
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Nammu, Travelinglady
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Angelique67, Travelinglady
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