"Life is completed and no longer worth living"

here today · Jul 11, 2020 at 06:39 PM

Can anybody relate to that feeling? I happened across this article on Google and thought it was interesting:

Ready to give up on life: The lived experience of elderly people who feel life is completed and no longer worth living - ScienceDirect

Travelinglady · Jul 11, 2020 at 08:32 PM

I don't feel that way. I have a lot I still want to get done. But I can understand somebody who is really old (90 plus) and can't see, hear, taste much, etc. to feel that way.

unaluna · Jul 11, 2020 at 09:23 PM

Good article. Yeah not there yet. Tired a lot, but who cares.

Nammu · Jul 11, 2020 at 09:44 PM

Mum is 92 she says things like that occasionally. Three years ago when my daughter announced she was pregnant mum said she'd never see the baby, the baby is 2 now!

unaluna · Jul 11, 2020 at 10:57 PM

Italians say about their old people, "well, she still enjoys her food!"

I had some pea soup from a convenience store that caused me to have an unpleasant surprise in my late 30's. Once you get over that hump, everything else is gravy - so to speak!

winter4me · Jul 12, 2020 at 05:22 AM

There are days I have those feelings but they pass. (and I think I had these thoughts when I was much younger too...)
Sometimes I just feel disconnected, drift too much into the past, fear dependence...
Think of walking off with my knapsack...(my thing)...'while I still can'

Trace14 · Jul 17, 2020 at 03:11 AM

I think my dad felt that way before his suicide. He started having a lot of health problems and not being able to do the things he enjoyed. He realized he had a wonderful life as a young man and then he just stopped doing anything because he felt so bad. Scary thing is that I feel like I'm walking in his footsteps.

Travelinglady · Jul 17, 2020 at 03:51 PM

trace, what can we do to help? I have lots of pain, even with opoids, but I'm hanging in here--if only to aggravate other people!

Trace14 · Jul 18, 2020 at 12:09 AM

I don't know what the answer is. Just taking it one day at a time is the best I can do for right now. It will all work out.

Travelinglady · Jul 18, 2020 at 10:04 AM

Glad to hear that, fellow Tar Heel!

At least we tend to get health problems rather spaced out, so we can adjust. I believe I am still making some mental-health advancements, even at my age--like finally being able to cry at sad TV shows, etc. That just happened recently and I am glad to have lived to have experienced it.

*Beth* · Jul 19, 2020 at 01:19 PM

I'm only 57 and I feel that way to a degree I don't like. I think the biggest shock, and sadness, for me is my children. I was a stay at home mom until they were pre-teens, then I worked part-time.

I loved my occupation as at at-home mom. I expected that my kids and I would always be very close. Well, now my daughter is 35, my son is 31. Both are married. In uncomfortable ways my son-in-law and I sometimes clash. I adore my daughter-in-law. But, all the "kids" are deeply involved with their careers. They are successful, doing very well with their lives. And that is terrific!

The problem is that I see them about twice a year, maybe three times on a good year. No grandchildren are in sight, which is a tremendous disappointment to me (although, I never say a word to the kids about that).

It's down to my husband and I. We've been married for over 30 years, but don't live together, although we are dear friends. He lives 1 mile from me. However, he's 73. If he dies before I do, then what? In my dreams my kids will step up. In reality, however...??

Anyway, upon reading the article your posted Here Today, the clanging thought in my mind was Something is very wrong with how we treat our seniors! There's something seriously messed up with a society that values people only when they are strong, healthy, and under the age of 60.

antfuzz · Aug 09, 2020 at 10:34 PM

Stopppp .. but NO . (sorry yes Im new) but .. NO .
dont Do that to those you Love and will leave behind .. No . No No and (pleeeease) No .. !

winter4me · Jul 23, 2020 at 07:01 AM

TLady you hit on a "thing" for me right now,
wanting/needing to cry. But I don't cry do I? On the rare occasion I do, the relief is wonderful....

continuosly blue · Aug 10, 2020 at 02:49 PM

I lost my zest for life a long time ago. Too many things to mention.
So called "family " , what a joke , whether blood or not . Can't trust anybody. So many lies. People just care about themselves. Selfishness....narcissism...etc...
Now I know that there are good people out there......I just have not have been
lucky enough to meet them ! You see , I believe life is one big controlled chaos.
You have to be in the right place at the right time.
Our society in general is going to hell in a handbasket.
And this virus thing isn't helping much.
Ah , f*** it , I'll end there. BTW : I am grateful for MANY things...
even though it doesn't sound like it..........

TunedOut · Mar 04, 2021 at 04:27 AM

I felt like my life was completed (that I unable to accomplish anything else) and no longer worth living at age 51. The only thing wrong with my heath then was that I was overweight (my back would occasionally go out because of this)--boy, was I a lot more flexible and I had much less pain (I am 57 now). I nearly succeeded in ending my life. Like some others on this thread, my children were part of the crisis. There were some areas where I felt like I had failed them. I thought there was nothing else I could do to help them other than leave them some money. I realize I am worth more than that now. I realize that I do not choose when I go. I still try to help them as much as I can but realize that they are the ones in control and responsible for their lives though I try to be encouraging to them as much as I can....

Travelinglady · Mar 05, 2021 at 01:46 AM

I let my sons live and let live as much as I can. I'm not one of those mothers who live for them, although I have to say I feel like I'd never commit suicide,. thinking it might devastate them or at least affect them negatively.

I'm 66 and have a lot I want to accomplish before passing on.

Trace14 · Mar 05, 2021 at 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

I let my sons live and let live as much as I can. I'm not one of those mothers who live for them, although I have to say I feel like I'd never commit suicide,. thinking it might devastate them or at least affect them negatively.

I'm 66 and have a lot I want to accomplish before passing on.

Parent Suicide does negatively affect children. It just passing on the stress, trauma, depression, thoughts of suicide on to the kids. I mean after all these were strong people in the eyes of the children. Children often mimic the parents because of their respect and admiration of them. The easy way out does seem easy until the dust settles and the damage is more wide spread than ever thought. IMHO

TunedOut · Mar 06, 2021 at 02:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trace14

Parent Suicide does negatively affect children...the damage is more wide spread than ever thought. IMHO

I agree.

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here today Grand Magnate Member Since Jun 2012 Location: USA Posts: 3,515 11 1,429 hugs given	Jul 11, 2020 at 06:39 PM #1 Can anybody relate to that feeling? I happened across this article on Google and thought it was interesting: Ready to give up on life: The lived experience of elderly people who feel life is completed and no longer worth living - ScienceDirect
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Travelinglady Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Sep 2010 Location: North Carolina Posts: 48,215 (SuperPoster!) 13 22.9k hugs given	Jul 11, 2020 at 08:32 PM #2 I don't feel that way. I have a lot I still want to get done. But I can understand somebody who is really old (90 plus) and can't see, hear, taste much, etc. to feel that way.
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unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,058 (SuperPoster!) 12 66.8k hugs given	Jul 11, 2020 at 09:23 PM #3 Good article. Yeah not there yet. Tired a lot, but who cares.
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unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,058 (SuperPoster!) 12 66.8k hugs given	Jul 11, 2020 at 10:57 PM #5 Italians say about their old people, "well, she still enjoys her food!" I had some pea soup from a convenience store that caused me to have an unpleasant surprise in my late 30's. Once you get over that hump, everything else is gravy - so to speak!
	Reply With Quote

winter4me Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2012 Location: new england Posts: 7,733 11 1,818 hugs given	Jul 12, 2020 at 05:22 AM #6 There are days I have those feelings but they pass. (and I think I had these thoughts when I was much younger too...) Sometimes I just feel disconnected, drift too much into the past, fear dependence... Think of walking off with my knapsack...(my thing)...'while I still can' __________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris
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Trace14 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2014 Location: North Carolina Posts: 4,009 9 2,762 hugs given	Jul 17, 2020 at 03:11 AM #7 I think my dad felt that way before his suicide. He started having a lot of health problems and not being able to do the things he enjoyed. He realized he had a wonderful life as a young man and then he just stopped doing anything because he felt so bad. Scary thing is that I feel like I'm walking in his footsteps. __________________ "Caught in the Quiet"
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Travelinglady Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Sep 2010 Location: North Carolina Posts: 48,215 (SuperPoster!) 13 22.9k hugs given	Jul 17, 2020 at 03:51 PM #8 trace, what can we do to help? I have lots of pain, even with opoids, but I'm hanging in here--if only to aggravate other people!
	Reply With Quote

Trace14 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2014 Location: North Carolina Posts: 4,009 9 2,762 hugs given	Jul 18, 2020 at 12:09 AM #9 I don't know what the answer is. Just taking it one day at a time is the best I can do for right now. It will all work out. __________________ "Caught in the Quiet"
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Travelinglady Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Sep 2010 Location: North Carolina Posts: 48,215 (SuperPoster!) 13 22.9k hugs given	Jul 18, 2020 at 10:04 AM #10 Glad to hear that, fellow Tar Heel! At least we tend to get health problems rather spaced out, so we can adjust. I believe I am still making some mental-health advancements, even at my age--like finally being able to cry at sad TV shows, etc. That just happened recently and I am glad to have lived to have experienced it.
	Reply With Quote

antfuzz New Member Member Since Aug 2020 Location: USA Posts: 7 3 7 hugs given	Aug 09, 2020 at 10:34 PM #12 Stopppp .. but NO . (sorry yes Im new) but .. NO . dont Do that to those you Love and will leave behind .. No . No No and (pleeeease) No .. !
	Reply With Quote

winter4me Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2012 Location: new england Posts: 7,733 11 1,818 hugs given	Jul 23, 2020 at 07:01 AM #13 TLady you hit on a "thing" for me right now, wanting/needing to cry. But I don't cry do I? On the rare occasion I do, the relief is wonderful.... __________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris
	Reply With Quote

Travelinglady Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Sep 2010 Location: North Carolina Posts: 48,215 (SuperPoster!) 13 22.9k hugs given	Mar 05, 2021 at 01:46 AM #16 I let my sons live and let live as much as I can. I'm not one of those mothers who live for them, although I have to say I feel like I'd never commit suicide,. thinking it might devastate them or at least affect them negatively. I'm 66 and have a lot I want to accomplish before passing on.
	Reply With Quote