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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
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#1
Can anybody relate to that feeling? I happened across this article on Google and thought it was interesting:
Ready to give up on life: The lived experience of elderly people who feel life is completed and no longer worth living - ScienceDirect |
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*Beth*, TunedOut
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*Beth*, Blknblu
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 48,099
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#2
I don't feel that way. I have a lot I still want to get done. But I can understand somebody who is really old (90 plus) and can't see, hear, taste much, etc. to feel that way.
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here today
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
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#3
Good article. Yeah not there yet. Tired a lot, but who cares.
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Blknblu, here today, Travelinglady
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
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#4
Mum is 92 she says things like that occasionally. Three years ago when my daughter announced she was pregnant mum said she'd never see the baby, the baby is 2 now!
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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*Beth*, antfuzz, Travelinglady, unaluna
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*Beth*, here today, Travelinglady, unaluna
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 39,917
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#5
Italians say about their old people, "well, she still enjoys her food!"
I had some pea soup from a convenience store that caused me to have an unpleasant surprise in my late 30's. Once you get over that hump, everything else is gravy - so to speak! |
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*Beth*, Blknblu, here today, Nammu, Travelinglady
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: new england
Posts: 7,733
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#6
There are days I have those feelings but they pass. (and I think I had these thoughts when I was much younger too...)
Sometimes I just feel disconnected, drift too much into the past, fear dependence... Think of walking off with my knapsack...(my thing)...'while I still can' __________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
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antfuzz, Nammu, Travelinglady
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Blknblu, here today, Travelinglady
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 4,009
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#7
I think my dad felt that way before his suicide. He started having a lot of health problems and not being able to do the things he enjoyed. He realized he had a wonderful life as a young man and then he just stopped doing anything because he felt so bad. Scary thing is that I feel like I'm walking in his footsteps.
__________________ "Caught in the Quiet" |
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*Beth*, Travelinglady, winter4me
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#8
trace, what can we do to help? I have lots of pain, even with opoids, but I'm hanging in here--if only to aggravate other people!
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Trace14
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Trace14, winter4me
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 4,009
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#9
I don't know what the answer is. Just taking it one day at a time is the best I can do for right now. It will all work out.
__________________ "Caught in the Quiet" |
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*Beth*, Travelinglady
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*Beth*, Travelinglady
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Legendary Wise Elder
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Location: North Carolina
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#10
Glad to hear that, fellow Tar Heel! At least we tend to get health problems rather spaced out, so we can adjust. I believe I am still making some mental-health advancements, even at my age--like finally being able to cry at sad TV shows, etc. That just happened recently and I am glad to have lived to have experienced it.
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Trace14
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Trace14, winter4me
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
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#11
I'm only 57 and I feel that way to a degree I don't like. I think the biggest shock, and sadness, for me is my children. I was a stay at home mom until they were pre-teens, then I worked part-time.
I loved my occupation as at at-home mom. I expected that my kids and I would always be very close. Well, now my daughter is 35, my son is 31. Both are married. In uncomfortable ways my son-in-law and I sometimes clash. I adore my daughter-in-law. But, all the "kids" are deeply involved with their careers. They are successful, doing very well with their lives. And that is terrific! The problem is that I see them about twice a year, maybe three times on a good year. No grandchildren are in sight, which is a tremendous disappointment to me (although, I never say a word to the kids about that). It's down to my husband and I. We've been married for over 30 years, but don't live together, although we are dear friends. He lives 1 mile from me. However, he's 73. If he dies before I do, then what? In my dreams my kids will step up. In reality, however...?? Anyway, upon reading the article your posted Here Today, the clanging thought in my mind was Something is very wrong with how we treat our seniors! There's something seriously messed up with a society that values people only when they are strong, healthy, and under the age of 60. __________________ |
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here today, Nammu, Travelinglady, TunedOut
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GranCindy
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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#12
Definitely, BR. I sometimes think I did something wrong in how I reared my two sons. One only calls now and then and the other none at all. And no letters, etc. Boy, were my parents blessed!
And when the kids live nearby with their young children, I've noticed they often expect their parents to be on-the-spot baby sitters. Neither of my sons is married in their late twenties. I do have to say they have very demanding jobs--but I read on facebook about the other things they do. Younger son says he will put me in a good nursing home. It's sort of a joke between us, but...... |
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*Beth*, Nammu, TunedOut
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*Beth*
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
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#13
We had our Schnoodle, Joey, " put to sleep" (as the euphemism goes) this past Friday. We estimate he was around 16 or 17 & had been treated for kidney disease for the past 3+ years. I miss him more than I can express. I cry every day thinking of him.
I don't believe in god or in life after death (for people or other species of animal either.) Yet I imagine him young & healthy again & perhaps playing joyfully in a lovely meadow with friends who passed on before him... free of the yoke of human domination. But I have also told him that if he is alone & afraid, & if he can, to come for me. I want nothing more than to be with him. __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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*Beth*, GranCindy, here today, IrisBloom, Nammu, Saunder, Trace14, Travelinglady, unaluna
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: new england
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#14
TLady you hit on a "thing" for me right now,
wanting/needing to cry. But I don't cry do I? On the rare occasion I do, the relief is wonderful.... __________________ "...don't say Home / the bones of that word mend slowly...' marie harris |
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here today, Travelinglady
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New Member
Member Since Aug 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 7
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#15
Stopppp .. but NO . (sorry yes Im new) but .. NO .
dont Do that to those you Love and will leave behind .. No . No No and (pleeeease) No .. ! |
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*Beth*, Travelinglady
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: USA
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#16
I lost my zest for life a long time ago. Too many things to mention.
So called "family " , what a joke , whether blood or not . Can't trust anybody. So many lies. People just care about themselves. Selfishness....narcissism...etc... Now I know that there are good people out there......I just have not have been lucky enough to meet them ! You see , I believe life is one big controlled chaos. You have to be in the right place at the right time. Our society in general is going to hell in a handbasket. And this virus thing isn't helping much. Ah , f*** it , I'll end there. BTW : I am grateful for MANY things... even though it doesn't sound like it.......... __________________ Today is the first day of the rest of my life. *Disclaimer * Anything I have posted is strictly my own personal opinion or experience , and is in no way, shape, or form meant to portray a professional assesment of any kind. CB |
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*Beth*, here today, Travelinglady
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*Beth*, Travelinglady
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
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#17
Quote:
I feel ya, Trav. My parents were super lucky, too. Very. *sigh* __________________ |
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Travelinglady
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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#18
One of our sons called hubby and me to wish us a "Happy Anniversary" today, so that's nice. He's trying to coordinate our plans to get together for the holidays..
Maybe our other son will call, too, We'll see. I went to my weight management doc for the second time today. She's modifying my diet and giving me metformin to try to kick start my metabolic rate. As it is, I can only eat 800 calories a day without gaining weight. Isn't that just great! This was one of those days when I've really been in a fog. Here's me at the doctor's office: "Would you please speak up?. I can't hear too well. So, I'm getting new glasses at the end of the month--I mean. hearing aids!" I think I'll run for PREZ. |
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here today
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
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#19
I agree that things seem to be falling apart around us--but there have been bad times before and people and our country got through them. It's my personal religious faith that gives me hope.
But my enjoyment of life is lessened by the physical pain I have and the difficulty at getting things done. However, I have some major goals I'd like to accomplish before leaving this earth, such as getting some books published by real publishers. As I think I've mentioned, I'm working on a second book, and need to revise my first, mainly shortening it, I'm told. And I want to try my hand at writing sci-fi and a general literary novel based on my childhood. A new doctor I have thinks better nutrition will cut down on my pain, so I am following the diet she recommends. We'll see. I like the life guideline the main character in a short story espoused: "Life while you live and then die and be done with it!" |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: North Carolina
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#20
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__________________ "Caught in the Quiet" |
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