[here today]

Can anybody relate to that feeling? I happened across this article on Google and thought it was interesting:

Ready to give up on life: The lived experience of elderly people who feel life is completed and no longer worth living - ScienceDirect

[Travelinglady]

I don't feel that way. I have a lot I still want to get done. But I can understand somebody who is really old (90 plus) and can't see, hear, taste much, etc. to feel that way.

[unaluna]

Good article. Yeah not there yet. Tired a lot, but who cares.

[Nammu]

Mum is 92 she says things like that occasionally. Three years ago when my daughter announced she was pregnant mum said she'd never see the baby, the baby is 2 now!

[unaluna]

Italians say about their old people, "well, she still enjoys her food!"

I had some pea soup from a convenience store that caused me to have an unpleasant surprise in my late 30's. Once you get over that hump, everything else is gravy - so to speak!

[winter4me]

There are days I have those feelings but they pass. (and I think I had these thoughts when I was much younger too...)
Sometimes I just feel disconnected, drift too much into the past, fear dependence...
Think of walking off with my knapsack...(my thing)...'while I still can'

[Trace14]

I think my dad felt that way before his suicide. He started having a lot of health problems and not being able to do the things he enjoyed. He realized he had a wonderful life as a young man and then he just stopped doing anything because he felt so bad. Scary thing is that I feel like I'm walking in his footsteps.

[Travelinglady]

trace, what can we do to help? I have lots of pain, even with opoids, but I'm hanging in here--if only to aggravate other people!

[Trace14]

I don't know what the answer is. Just taking it one day at a time is the best I can do for right now. It will all work out.

[Travelinglady]

Glad to hear that, fellow Tar Heel! At least we tend to get health problems rather spaced out, so we can adjust. I believe I am still making some mental-health advancements, even at my age--like finally being able to cry at sad TV shows, etc. That just happened recently and I am glad to have lived to have experienced it.

[*Beth*]

I'm only 57 and I feel that way to a degree I don't like. I think the biggest shock, and sadness, for me is my children. I was a stay at home mom until they were pre-teens, then I worked part-time.

I loved my occupation as at at-home mom. I expected that my kids and I would always be very close. Well, now my daughter is 35, my son is 31. Both are married. In uncomfortable ways my son-in-law and I sometimes clash. I adore my daughter-in-law. But, all the "kids" are deeply involved with their careers. They are successful, doing very well with their lives. And that is terrific!

The problem is that I see them about twice a year, maybe three times on a good year. No grandchildren are in sight, which is a tremendous disappointment to me (although, I never say a word to the kids about that).

It's down to my husband and I. We've been married for over 30 years, but don't live together, although we are dear friends. He lives 1 mile from me. However, he's 73. If he dies before I do, then what? In my dreams my kids will step up. In reality, however...??

Anyway, upon reading the article your posted Here Today, the clanging thought in my mind was Something is very wrong with how we treat our seniors! There's something seriously messed up with a society that values people only when they are strong, healthy, and under the age of 60.

[Travelinglady]

Definitely, BR. I sometimes think I did something wrong in how I reared my two sons. One only calls now and then and the other none at all. And no letters, etc. Boy, were my parents blessed!

And when the kids live nearby with their young children, I've noticed they often expect their parents to be on-the-spot baby sitters. Neither of my sons is married in their late twenties. I do have to say they have very demanding jobs--but I read on facebook about the other things they do.

Younger son says he will put me in a good nursing home. It's sort of a joke between us, but......

[Skeezyks]

We had our Schnoodle, Joey, " put to sleep" (as the euphemism goes) this past Friday. We estimate he was around 16 or 17 & had been treated for kidney disease for the past 3+ years. I miss him more than I can express. I cry every day thinking of him.

I don't believe in god or in life after death (for people or other species of animal either.) Yet I imagine him young & healthy again & perhaps playing joyfully in a lovely meadow with friends who passed on before him... free of the yoke of human domination. But I have also told him that if he is alone & afraid, & if he can, to come for me. I want nothing more than to be with him.

[winter4me]

TLady you hit on a "thing" for me right now,
wanting/needing to cry. But I don't cry do I? On the rare occasion I do, the relief is wonderful....

[antfuzz]

Stopppp .. but NO . (sorry yes Im new) but .. NO .
dont Do that to those you Love and will leave behind .. No . No No and (pleeeease) No .. !

[continuosly blue]

I lost my zest for life a long time ago. Too many things to mention.
So called "family " , what a joke , whether blood or not . Can't trust anybody. So many lies. People just care about themselves. Selfishness....narcissism...etc...
Now I know that there are good people out there......I just have not have been
lucky enough to meet them ! You see , I believe life is one big controlled chaos.
You have to be in the right place at the right time.
Our society in general is going to hell in a handbasket.
And this virus thing isn't helping much.
Ah , f*** it , I'll end there. BTW : I am grateful for MANY things...
even though it doesn't sound like it..........

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

...Definitely, BR. I sometimes think I did something wrong in how I reared my two sons. One only calls now and then and the other none at all. And no letters, etc. Boy, were my parents blessed!...

I feel ya, Trav.


My parents were super lucky, too. Very. *sigh*

[Travelinglady]

One of our sons called hubby and me to wish us a "Happy Anniversary" today, so that's nice. He's trying to coordinate our plans to get together for the holidays..

Maybe our other son will call, too, We'll see.

I went to my weight management doc for the second time today. She's modifying my diet and giving me metformin to try to kick start my metabolic rate. As it is, I can only eat 800 calories a day without gaining weight. Isn't that just great!

This was one of those days when I've really been in a fog. Here's me at the doctor's office: "Would you please speak up?. I can't hear too well. So, I'm getting new glasses at the end of the month--I mean. hearing aids!" I think I'll run for PREZ.

[Travelinglady]

I agree that things seem to be falling apart around us--but there have been bad times before and people and our country got through them. It's my personal religious faith that gives me hope.

But my enjoyment of life is lessened by the physical pain I have and the difficulty at getting things done. However, I have some major goals I'd like to accomplish before leaving this earth, such as getting some books published by real publishers. As I think I've mentioned, I'm working on a second book, and need to revise my first, mainly shortening it, I'm told. And I want to try my hand at writing sci-fi and a general literary novel based on my childhood.

A new doctor I have thinks better nutrition will cut down on my pain, so I am following the diet she recommends. We'll see.

I like the life guideline the main character in a short story espoused: "Life while you live and then die and be done with it!"

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

I agree that things seem to be falling apart around us--but there have been bad times before and people and our country got through them. It's my personal religious faith that gives me hope.

But my enjoyment of life is lessened by the physical pain I have and the difficulty at getting things done. However, I have some major goals I'd like to accomplish before leaving this earth, such as getting some books published by real publishers. As I think I've mentioned, I'm working on a second book, and need to revise my first, mainly shortening it, I'm told. And I want to try my hand at writing sci-fi and a general literary novel based on my childhood.

A new doctor I have thinks better nutrition will cut down on my pain, so I am following the diet she recommends. We'll see.

I like the life guideline the main character in a short story espoused: "Life while you live and then die and be done with it!"

What kind of books have you written?

[TunedOut]

I felt like my life was completed (that I unable to accomplish anything else) and no longer worth living at age 51. The only thing wrong with my heath then was that I was overweight (my back would occasionally go out because of this)--boy, was I a lot more flexible and I had much less pain (I am 57 now). I nearly succeeded in ending my life. Like some others on this thread, my children were part of the crisis. There were some areas where I felt like I had failed them. I thought there was nothing else I could do to help them other than leave them some money. I realize I am worth more than that now. I realize that I do not choose when I go. I still try to help them as much as I can but realize that they are the ones in control and responsible for their lives though I try to be encouraging to them as much as I can....

[Travelinglady]

I let my sons live and let live as much as I can. I'm not one of those mothers who live for them, although I have to say I feel like I'd never commit suicide,. thinking it might devastate them or at least affect them negatively.

I'm 66 and have a lot I want to accomplish before passing on.

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

I let my sons live and let live as much as I can. I'm not one of those mothers who live for them, although I have to say I feel like I'd never commit suicide,. thinking it might devastate them or at least affect them negatively.

I'm 66 and have a lot I want to accomplish before passing on.

Parent Suicide does negatively affect children. It just passing on the stress, trauma, depression, thoughts of suicide on to the kids. I mean after all these were strong people in the eyes of the children. Children often mimic the parents because of their respect and admiration of them. The easy way out does seem easy until the dust settles and the damage is more wide spread than ever thought. IMHO

[TunedOut]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Parent Suicide does negatively affect children...the damage is more wide spread than ever thought. IMHO

I agree.