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LostSavant
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Default Jun 15, 2024 at 04:56 PM
  #1
I need some advice. I'm a 60 year old woman, and I own my house. I have 2 roommates. Another woman who is 60 and legally blind. And a 70 year old disabled male veteran. Within the past year, the vet has been displaying signs of cognitive decline and ISB (inappropriate sexual behavior). The ISB is starting to become a problem for us women. He is making us feel uncomfortable. The vet has been living with us for 11 years. We have no legal rights. He has a wife in another state that left him 12 years ago, after 26 years of marriage, with no real contact. None of us have any family here in Florida. He refuses to tell his doctors at the VA out of fear of loosing his independence. And if we bring up the subject he gets angry at us. At this point in time, he has not physically harmed us, but we do fear that this could change in the future. What recourse do we have? What avenues are possibly available to us? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you. Peace.

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CANDC
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Default Jun 16, 2024 at 10:20 AM
  #2
@LostSavant I hear your concern. Living with uncertainty is difficult. I do not know how to solve that situation. As you probably know it is difficult to get someone help if they do not want it.

Some practical advice would be to have privacy locks on you and the other woman's bedroom doors and use them at night. If not possible even a chair leaning against the door can alert you to some one entering.

Have your phone available at all times.

It sounds like talking with him about getting treatment is triggering and may only be making things worse.

Look at all the possible options that are practical for you and see how much this is disrupting the lives of you two women.

Rather than focus on getting him help, my first advice would be to have a safety plan.

CANDC

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Default Jul 09, 2024 at 02:09 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by CANDC View Post
@LostSavant I hear your concern. Living with uncertainty is difficult. I do not know how to solve that situation. As you probably know it is difficult to get someone help if they do not want it.

Some practical advice would be to have privacy locks on you and the other woman's bedroom doors and use them at night. If not possible even a chair leaning against the door can alert you to some one entering.

Have your phone available at all times.

It sounds like talking with him about getting treatment is triggering and may only be making things worse.

Look at all the possible options that are practical for you and see how much this is disrupting the lives of you two women.

Rather than focus on getting him help, my first advice would be to have a safety plan.

CANDC

[If you want me to see your reply to this post please include @CANDC in your message - not in requoting my message]


I agree with CANDC, assuming from what you said that you can't find any other place to put him. I am wondering why you have no legal rights, though. Was there no contract or such?
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