I love her but I am a serial cheater

BBGR · 07:38 PM

Hello,

I am for almost 10 years in a relation with my now fiance, and future wife.

I consider her as a perfect woman for me: beautiful, fun, I never get bored with her, we have so much in common etc

Before her I just saw a couple of women,but she was my only real girlfriend.

The first years of relation with her were intense, I was very often very aroused near her. We were kinda shy (I think I had also some psychological ed) so we started to get intimate slowly.

Sex with her is, also now, sweet and enjoyable with her, but I am not as aroused as I was in the beginning, which I think is very normal.

However, after a few years of being with her, I started to become more and more obsessed with thinking about other women, till I saw some others knew from internet.

Possible trigger:

I started also going to escorts/prostitutes, as I felt I want to experiment more, with other women also. I did only oral sex with them (me active)

I never intended to find another women to replace my GF.

Till now, I cheated on her with around 20 women (only oral sex), only with one I had also normal sex - this one was like the only "long affair" (I kinda got sexually bored also of her after a while, even tho I felt the lust feeling; but the love feeling was surely all the time for my fiance)

Usually after I make something sexually with a women I don't know, I am no longer interested in her.

I cheat mostly from impulse. Also that I feel myself often very aroused and thinking a lot about sex with women I don't know.

But I really do love my fiance.

Just that I find it hard to resist to do sexual stuff with other women.

What do you think?

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I love her but I am a serial cheater

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