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Member
Member Since Feb 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 123
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Sep 10, 2009 at 08:06 AM
#1
My partner and I do not share a a bedroom. Often I will wake up at night to use the bathroom or get something to drink and discover my partner masturbating. I know this is a normal and healthy behavior. Why then do I struggle with this so much?
I often think I'm the only person on the planet who doesn't masturbate, so perhaps this is why I struggle with this. I know that even those who have a satisfying sex life masturbate, so why do I still feel so inadequate? Sometimes it's bothering me so much that I can't hide it and I end up sharing with my partner what is on my mind. He assures me he would rather have sex with me than himself. My partner has a much higher sex drive than I do so I think he oftens assumes I don't want to without even asking me. Then I find him masturbating and my first thought is, "he didn't even ask me." I'm so confused. Logically I know this is all normal but it still bothers me beyond belief. 
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
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Sep 10, 2009 at 10:46 AM
#2
having been on your same end of the stick I understand how it makes you feel hon. I don't know the answers but know you are not alone.
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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 Eagle3
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Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 9,946
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Sep 10, 2009 at 10:47 AM
#3
Yes, you are right it is normal and what you must remember (drill into your brain and accept) is that this is in no way about YOU.... it is about him and some thing he is needing rather it be physical or emotional.
Accepting this will enable you to be a happier person and couple... ((( hugs ))) I like Bebop have been there... and I came out on the other side. |
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Eagle3
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Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 1,177
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Sep 10, 2009 at 05:31 PM
#4
I would just ask him to ask you before he does it. If he is forgetting about some of your needs than you should tell him.
__________________ Live in the moment. Right now is the only thing we really have.  |
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Eagle3
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Pirate Goddess
Member Since Oct 2005
Location: South Jersey, USA
Posts: 5,246
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Sep 12, 2009 at 01:21 AM
#5
Also, it's normal to prefer masturbation sometimes. You don't have to worry about someone else's pleasure, and it takes the pressure off. It relieves stress, too.
__________________ Maven If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream. Equal Rights Are Not Special Rights  |
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Eagle3
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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