[LiteraryLark]

deleted.

[Big Mama]

concerned about you whats up. If it was important enough for you to put something here in the first place, it must be important. If it is important to you it is important to me.

Whats wrong.

[LiteraryLark]

My boyfriend lives an hour and a half away and I don't have enough gas money to see him every week, even if we alternate coming back and forth. My dad suggested that he comes up to my house once a month and I come up to his house once a month. But I don't know if I can handle being in a relationship where I only see him twice a month. Plus he is currently undergoing physical evaluations to join the air force, so then I won't be able to see him for months at a time. I don't know if I can handle that, or if I can have sex with him and then have him go off to the air force. I feel stuck on how to make it work.

edit: But I do want to make this work and I do want to be with him, but to see him only twice a month?

[hamster-bamster]

If you have overwhelming feelings for him and cannot will yourself out of your feelings (which would be totally understandable), then you can make any arrangement work.

If you do not have overwhelming feelings for him, it is better not to proceed with this very complicated set-up.

[Big Mama]

Can you use skype to visit w/ him. twice a month is not great but the convince of being in one another homes is a great opportunity. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. You can skype him once he is in the military to you know. It takes a little bit to get it set up but it is allowed.

[Harley47]

Hi Doc.

Skype is a great tool for things like this, and Hamster and Big Mama gave great advice. Ultimately, if your feelings towards him and his towards you are strong enough, you two can overcome quite a bit. It is just a matter of knowing truly in your heart that you both love each other to wait on one another, which though I pose it as a "simple" matter, can be hard. I won't lie to you and say it's easy, per se...it's not. I've been in a similar position to yours, and it is hard not being able to be there at times, particularly when the other is going through something difficult. But it's not impossible, by any means..."amor vincit omnia." Love conquers all. Perhaps a little vague as far as advice goes, but I think the phrase is pretty applicable here. It's just a matter of truly knowing, you know?

Hugs, and wishing you both my best,
Harley

[LiteraryLark]

Update

Personally, I don't have any attraction for him. I've tried to make magic happen and it didn't happen. I'm just going to tell him that it's too much of a distance to see him.

Now I'm bummed because I don't know where I'm going to find someone new.

[Harley47]

Don't worry about where to find the new guy Doc. I'm sure one of you will stumble into the other eventually...it just takes some time. I don't think you, in the long run, will have any trouble finding a good guy. It just takes some trial and error, is all, which I know sucks. But you'll find him.

For now, just try to take things easy. All good things come in time.

[hamster-bamster]

I think you have made the right decision.