At what point do fetishes go too far?

I know that if you or your partner is in pain or isn't feeling good, then you need to stop. But what about the fetish itself? Is there a certain point in which a fetish becomes too taboo or risky to even perform? Are there certain fetishes that need to be avoided whether or not you or your partner enjoys it?

if both partners enjoy it, i personally don't see a problem ... who has the right to judge if both partners enjoy? ... just my opinion

Anything that involves:

- lack of consent
- children
- animals
- breaking the law
- threat of serious/irreversible injury to someone (even if consensual)
- so excessive it interferes with normal functioning (i.e. work, relationships)

Are you pooping onto a plate, eating it, and then regretting your behavior after it's all over?

No?

Well then you're probably okay.

There are a lot of fetishes which are disgusting, pathetic, creepy, bizarre, and disturbing. BUT, that doesn't make them inherently unhealthy or wrong. If you feel that your fetish is NOT against your morals, it isn't interfering with your life, you aren't seriously injuring yourself or anyone else, and you are not violating other people's rights, then there is nothing to worry about.

At the risk of entering a minefield, what is wrong with children? I find pedophilia disgusting but if it's in a person's own mind or even drawings and stories, then what's the problem? It's not like there's a cure for it anyway. These people will never be happy so long as they repress their fantasies. To advocate that is lunacy and the worst attitude psychology can take.

Don't get me wrong, but whats wrong with breaking the law? What really matters is whether what you are doing is wrong and if you will get caught or not. I think you should modify this statement or remove it. For example, a person might have a fetish for some material which is illegal in their country, that doesn't mean they shouldn't be able to consume it as long as they can do so with little risk.

I do agree that there is a difference between pedophilia and child abuse (one being something that is not chosen, one being the action which is a choice) but I think, correct me if I'm wrong, bipolar was probably more thinking about situations where children were actively involved?

here in the USA (united States of America) each state / city/ town has its own rules and laws about this kind of thing.

in general here in New York its going too far when one or the other consenting adult says ***No*** after that it becomes rape, sexual assault, domestic violence.

Consenting adult means anyone aged 18 and above who is able to make their own decisions...example minor is considered not able to make their own decisions, some people with handicaps may not be able to consent depending upon how their disability affects them, a person with mental disorders may not be a consenting adult in some cases and locations..

best thing to do is contact a crisis center or police department where you are, they can tell you what the rules, laws are about this in your location. you dont necessarily have to go in to details. many that I know call up and say they are college students doing papers on the topic and need info. crisis centers and law enforcement are always willing to help educate the public here in New York/USA.

As long as the sexual activities occur between consenting adults, I see no problem. Of course, children and animals are entirely different cases and should be treated as such.

Children are not consenting adults. Child pornography is illegal because they are not 18+, and are put through abuse by being exploited and raped. No one of any status is allowed to watch child pornography. I can't watch child pornography, old ladies can't watch child pornography, no one can. It may be one thing to admire children in secret, but to lure real-life children and involve children in your sexual fantasies is not okay in any sense or reasoning. Pedophiles cannot control their actions, making them sex offenders when they abduct children or manipulate them into being abused and raped, and by law they have to avoid certain situations like living near schools or visiting toy stores, kids' clothing stores, perhaps even entire malls where any children will be present.

So when I am talking about fetishes I am talking about performing certain sexual deeds such as BDSM, or dressing in a taboo or explicit way. You couldn't do that to a child and have any logical reasoning to make that okay. It's like saying "It wasn't my fault I crashed the car, it was the alcohol, so alcohol is to blame and not me."

I'm not going into breaking the law...breaking the law is breaking the law...If you have a fetish for raping and murdering women, is that okay to do so as long as you're not caught? It really depends on the severity, but breaking the law is breaking the law and it's really not advisable to do so.

As far as I know, the research seems to indicate that indulging pedophilic fantasies actually increases the chance that a pedophile will harm a child. In theory I don't think it's wrong for someone to fantasize about children in their own mind or write stories or draw erotic pictures involving children, but in practice, I think it's very unwise for a pedophile to do so. I know when I watch porn or fantasize about men, it makes me crave sex more. On the other hand, if I don't have sex for a long time and don't watch porn or indulge in fantasies, my craving for sex diminishes. I imagine it's probably the same for pedophiles.

Also, again as far as I know, pedophiles are not simply like regular people but attracted to children. There seems to be some differences in their brains. They have an extremely high recidivism rate, and I've read that this is because they have problems with impulse control in general.

So, let me ammend my statement:
a)someone who is attracted to children in real life, has fantasized about a real child that they have seen, or has ever touched a child inappropriately or come close to touching a child inappropriately, should most likely try not to fantasize about children or write erotic stories or draw erotic pictures of them

b)someone who has never touched a child, is not attracted to children in real life, and has never felt the urge to touch a child or watch child porn, is probably safe writing erotic stories and drawing erotic pictures of children. This is typically done in the context of various fandoms. But even in fandoms, it is rare to see true pedophilic erotic (involving pre-pubescent children under 12 or 10 years old). Most underage stories in fandom involve young teens -- but teens nonetheless. And that's not even pedophelia.

So ethically it is not wrong to fantasize about children unless you suspect that it will whet your appetite for harming one in real life. And for a lot of pedophiles, that's simply how it is.

If they are between two consenting adults, there isn't a problem.

However, if kids or animals are involved, then yes there is a big problem.

Everyone has their own hard limits. I agree with a lot of things people already said here. Being into some out there fetishes myself, I find it difficult to handle and portray to potential partners. Personally I would want to be committed to something safe, sane and consensual.

I much prefer RACK -- Risk Aware Consensual Kink! :P

Everyone everywhere is into different things. They will all have different definitions of what is wrong or gross or excessive. In broad terms, I agree with bipolarmed's response. There are all kinds of semantics but I try not to go too far into those because it just delves into a point of silliness.
There are SOME fetishes that can be somewhat dangerous in & of themselves. Erotic asphyxiation is a tricky practice that kills a great number of people accidentally. Playing with fire, blood, & sharp objects can also sometimes be risky. It's all a matter about being educated, careful, & being sure to have an equally informed partner.

What's wrong with children is that even if they are not physically touched, pedophilia can cause extreme psychological issues on children. And let's not forget to mention that if it is someones fetish, in many cases (albeit not all) the idea of the fetish starts to become so tempting they act more and more on it until a child is hurt. Just having an adult stare at a child lustfully can cause emotional damage on the child, and with each step further into the fetish they go, the worse the child suffers.

When you go to the emergency room the doctors say "Have you thought about hurting yourself or others?" you asnwer yes or no. Answering yes can and often will have you at least evaluated by a psychological doctor. Because there is something that needs help in thinking about hurting others or yourself. Same thing goes for children. It's not ok to want to touch and or hurt children, it's something that needs to be helped, like when people are suicidal or homicidal, something that needs help.

They don't have a set "cure" for schizophrenia bipolar OCD BPD or many other mental illnesses but it does not mean that they do not need emotional help. There may not be a set cure for pedophilia but there is a higher chance that the pedophile will not hurt a child if they get treatment for their disease.

And to answer the topic question, I think that as long as the act is between two consenting adults, and they are aware of the possible effects of the fetish, that nothing is too far. As long as they know the possibilities, are both willing to do it and are both of legal age

Children and animals are not capable of providing consent. That's that.

I'm starting to get into BDSM, at least I'm curious about it, I think it's finding what you're comfortable with. One person can find wearing a clown costume can be arousing and the other person would have a panic attack if they tried it. There are certain things I would never ever do, and there are people who would love doing the things I wouldn't want to do. Obviously, I would not want to hook up with someone who's into what I am not. It's the same as vanilla relationships, you have to be compatable and consentual in order for it to work.

As long as it is between two consenting ADULTS, and there is communication and rules and saftey words put in place I don't see the issues.

There are things I enjoy, such as bondage, spanking, etc that some people wouldn't go near either and that is okay. Different kinks for different folks.There are things my boyfriend is into that I wouldn't ever do and I have things bf doesn't want to either. That is okay, no two people's kinks will ever line up perfectly. They get made up for with a satsfying emotional and sexual connection that neither of us miss those things.

The biggest thing is knowing your partners limits and not pushing them, having a safe word in place for when things go to far and someone feels unsafe, keeping a constant open communication about those things and how you feel about them, what is okay what isn't okay, Aftercare, like cuddling or relaxing, or whatever works for you and your partner is a big deal too.

LOL, me also.

hahaha I answered my own question without realizing that it was mine.

That's so zen Hey Doc ... hope you're well
Ummm... Hope you're okay then lol