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jaypop30
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Angry May 12, 2012 at 01:57 PM
  #1
I am a bit embarrassed to talk about this but I could use some advice around this are of sexuality. I don't last for very long in bed with my wife which frustarates her. Which I can completly understand why she would feel this way. The odd thing is and I have had sex in the past with other woman and have lasted a long time. In the beganing of our relationship I used to last longer to but now I can't. Does anyone have advice for me on how to make my self last? or does anyone know why this happens to me? Sometimes I think that I am just extremly sensitive down there which causes me to not last long but I don't know. I am really confussed.
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Pandoren
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Default May 12, 2012 at 02:12 PM
  #2
There are certain techniques that can be tried in cases like these (such as the "stop-start technique") but I can't comment personally on their success rate. It might be worth doing some research on that and trying it if you haven't already. I don't know if a doctor can help in this particular case although if you aren't too shy it might be worth a shot there too. You can also get numbing condoms that are supposed to help with premature ejaculation but I don't know where you get those.

The only other things that come to mind are either taking her part way with another method first before you start intercourse, so that you might have more chance of finishing together or, as I understand it (again I have no personal experience here) but is it true that a man lasts longer the more times he orgasms in one session? I'm not going to pry into what activities you and your wife do beforehand (and to be frank I don't much want to know ) but perhaps if this is the case, you could try a little more foreplay?
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Default May 12, 2012 at 02:21 PM
  #3
(((jaypop30))0 - please don't be embarrassed because this is a common problem for men. One thing I can tell you is - worrying about this and being too concerned about not pleasing your partner....makes it much worse. Having a supportive wife is very important. Next - don't feel embarrassed or less of man.

There are several things you can try on your own and if you don't get results, then do consult with your doctor because some antidepressants can help with this. 1. try the stop and go method - when you think you're reaching the point of no return...stop and do some other foreplay. Your wife should help you and be aware of this. 2. squeeze gently the tip to prevent ejaculation. 3. most important of all is to relax. 4 another very important thing to do is mens Kegal exercises - this will strengthen the muscles and help you last longer. I'll give you a link for all this but let me describe how you find this muscle. If a person stops midstream during urination -this is the Kegal muscle. These can be done anytime of day and should be done regularly.

Once the man starts feeling anxiety about the PE, this snowballs and makes it worse. I also encourage you and your wife to cuddle and not have intercourse for a small time period - you can do foreplay but not intercourse. The reason for this - is to help with the anxiety, that touching means sex...which means PE. I hope this helps and if not do see your doctor. Best of luck.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0002492/

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/keg...or-men/MY01402

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Default May 12, 2012 at 08:49 PM
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There are a few things you can do. A lot of long-term couples forget about foreplay when they have sex. But, foreplay is important. In foreplay, focus on pleasing your wife and extending her pleasure. It will put less pressure when intercourse starts.

One of my best friends swears by this: have one beer before sex - it desensitizes him so that he lasts longer. It also makes him more relaxed emotionally. Works for him. I have not tried it.
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Default May 13, 2012 at 01:32 PM
  #5
I don't know how old you are, but it could simply be a factor in aging. At any rate, there is wonderful advice given so far in this thread, and I hope you follow it.

I wanted to add that you should try speaking to your doctor about it. He can help be of help to you in finding out why this is happening. Until then, while I confess I don't have any experience with them, I have heard they make condoms with a mild topical numbing agent in them. That could help you to be less sensitive and last a little longer.

But please, try not to stress about it. That only makes things worse if you're anxious.

Please take care, and I wish you my best.

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sallyjoseph
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Default Jan 19, 2013 at 05:45 AM
  #6
I've been my boyfriend for a few months now, but the last few times he haven't been able to last very long in bed with me. It's embarassing him and frustrated me because he want me to be pleasured too.he have tried those numbing condoms, and even thinking of something gross but it doesnt seem to help.Then he tried some medicine for that and it helps.
Kamagra Oral Jelly
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Default Feb 22, 2019 at 11:01 PM
  #7
Hi
Have you thought of extending your foreplay and exploring each other instead of just the 5 minute das to the end.
You can get pleasure by numourous methods.
Grab a couple of books and see what other people have done
Just dont give up its a learning experience that if you take it together will last a lifetime

Hope that helps

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Anonymous57363
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Default Feb 23, 2019 at 01:11 AM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaypop30 View Post
I am a bit embarrassed to talk about this but I could use some advice around this are of sexuality. I don't last for very long in bed with my wife which frustarates her. Which I can completly understand why she would feel this way. The odd thing is and I have had sex in the past with other woman and have lasted a long time. In the beganing of our relationship I used to last longer to but now I can't. Does anyone have advice for me on how to make my self last? or does anyone know why this happens to me? Sometimes I think that I am just extremly sensitive down there which causes me to not last long but I don't know. I am really confussed.

I think a stop-start method could help. Have you tried that? When you feel yourself getting too close too soon, stop, breathe, think of something else, and then start again when you're ready. It would likely still be frustrating for her for a while but if you explain it in advance I think it could help and get better over time. Otherwise, ever talked with a sex therapist?

Any idea why things changed since previous partners? Are you more nervous or excited now for any reason? Any use of porn before or now, more or less? It can affect things for men.
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Alvan
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Default Sep 30, 2019 at 07:33 AM
  #9
Try the redrawer method
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attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




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