O's but Ouch to

Hey you guys have become my life line to what is normal for sexual activities and behaviors.

I have run across an issue. My H and I have not been getting along. We've been doing T. It is finially helping. I take zoloft that kills my sex drive. and I'm 38 yr old.

Me and my H fienially got to have more then 30 secound, durring commercials, while the kids were occupied, SEX. Being that we have had pretty bad issues in our relationship, I have not been real happy about having sex w/ my H. It has been kinda of a just putting out to take care of H's needs.

Well getting along has done wonders. We had sex and it was MARVILIOUS. I have not had sex and O's with my H in maybe a year. Sex yes, O's w/ him no. O's alone yes. But here is the issue, I always have this horrible cramping for a few days after we have sex if I have O's. I had forgotten about how badly that hurt. Does this happen to anyone else?

I don't know if it is an age thing, if it is a usage of different muscles, if it is the time that is spent trying to get to the O. It doesn't cause discomfort solo. Just curious. Any input would be helpful.

Could it be muscle pain? Sometimes with sex we work muscles we don't usually work out with.

Adam thanks for responding. I sure do hope using different muscles is the culprit.

I forgot to add I have cysts on my ovaries, sometimes they get aggravated , ouch.

fibroids on your uterus perhaps? ask your gyn

possibly. May be worth checkin in to. Thanks Yoda.

I apparently have some fibroids, but have not experienced the symptoms you describe. I am not sure that my experience is significant though because each woman is different. I think the muscle stretching thing is something to consider too. I now that we have a lot of exercise doing it. I really love sex as long as there is adequate foreplay and stimulation which my husband seems to provide quite well. We are fairly active though I suppose, (2-3 times/week) and I suspect that has a bearing. Like anything muscles that you do not use very often have a way of complaining if they are suddenly forced to be more active
I wish you well in your relationship with your husband and my prayers are with you

Dragon, I am feeling much better. I have a feeling it was using muscles that have not seen pleasurable action in quite a while. A year is to long to go w/ out good sex. We have sex, just not long drawn out good sex.

I thought this was just tv advertisement sex and not long drawn out sex?

Hey, grats on the fun evening! lol Glad you're feeling better to boot.

I'd suspect the muscles. My suggestion? Odd as it may be, try to see if you can't limber up a bit before anything starts. You know where the soreness was better than I could imagine (limitations of anatomy and what all ), but maybe if you could stretch a bit before any...er..."strenuous activity"...it might help after the fact.

I hope things continue to improve, and I wish you all my best.

Hugs,
Harley

Same problem, let it go for 3 years, finally went to gyn, diagnosed with fibroids, had them removed, pain gone. Not saying that's you, jme.

You definitely have my sympathies though...hurt like a son of a gun!!!!

Illegal, Yeah more then 30 second tv commercial sex. Do your gf a favor spend more then 30 sec. If the TV commercial lasts longer then you do that's a bad sign man.

Harley, Yippee. . Almost forgot what it was like. Wish that the places that hurt were somewhere you could exercise an prepare before usage. I think that kind of exercise only comes w/ strenuousness use and practice. Not really looking for that kind of opportunity to present itself often. But maybe it will who knows.

NOTZ, thank you for your input as well. I don't know why there was pain the following hours and into the nest day. It feel more like I upset and disturbed something. If things improve w/ H and me and quick sex is a fading event and is replaced by more meaningful sex and the issue continues then I may have to have things checked. But that is a lot of "if's" and I ain't countin my chicks before they hatch if you know what I mean.

I am glad things are better for you. You are right, waiting a year for fulfilling sex with your husband is much much too long. Bam Bam Thank you mam doesn't do it. Hopefully you can work with him and convince him that he has a stake in seeing that you are fulfilled too

Dragon it was just as much my fault, if not more my fault then his. At least I will take responsibility for this sexual issue. He was verbally and emotionally abusive to me. I had no need or desire what so ever to have sex w/ him. A past rape and abuse from someone else before we got married, makes me tend to push folks away that make me feel threatened. And that was just what he was doing. Treating me like a child and bordering on abuse. So I was mostly taking care of his need, and it was a kind of simply put out to keep him faithful. Though he might not have even considered being unfaithful.

Now w/ 9 mo of this T and 6 mo of another T, we are finally at a point of getting along. And for the first time in a very long time I didn't fear my H and felt safe enough to at least be an active participant. Much to my surprise, things still work. With the delay in my meds, (stupid me for got to take them) and his pleasantries things happened to work out to my advantage as well as his. "O"

I don't know if the uncomfortable feeling and the pain was from lack of use for a long time or if something got aggravated or disturbed there or what. It was a pain that lingered for the rest of the evening and all the next day and night, much like the pain of miscarrying. Highly uncomfortable, doubling over pain.

Thanks for giving me a moment to elaborate. Thank you for sharing your opinion as well.