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Member Since Jan 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
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#1
I'm getting the strong urge to just make out with just about anyone and even get sexual..I was walking with my housemate today and after getting a whiff of her hair I just wanted to pull her close and kiss her (but I've never seen her that way). It's kinda scaring me. As a pseudo-loner I really don't get much physical contact with anyone (no lover either) so I guess its just been so long since Ive felt contact that its turning into sexual frustration? I don't know how to deal with these feelings and their getting stronger. I just don't want to randomly start making out with random people but Its getting to that point..sorry i know this post sounds ridiculous
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hamster-bamster
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Member Since Apr 2013
Location: Lincoln,NE
Posts: 133
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#2
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no its not ridiculous you cant help it do you want to be with your housemate if the feeling are getting stronger i would say you do but cant say for for because only you will know that. i get feeling like that to around any women just walking in the stores and i have to control it because i dont know them its hard to but i do |
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Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
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#3
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Member
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
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#4
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Member
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
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#5
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Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
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#6
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On the one hand, you seem to be dissociating in that you forget that you have a body. On the other hand, you just want to be touched which seems normal. It must be very difficult for you, living with all of this. |
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Member
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
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#7
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And I understand what you mean about the dissociatiative tendancy. When people don't talk to you and you to them, people overlook you. Much like when you pass a stranger on the street you avoid eye contact and pretend they're not there. Well that's me everyday I am rarely acknowledged so its easy to feel like a ghost..thanks that actually clarifies things for me.. |
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#8
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Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
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#9
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Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
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#10
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Member
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
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#11
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hamster-bamster
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Member Since Jul 2013
Posts: 9
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#12
Research is showing the importance of touch in human well-being. I think we actually confuse touch need with sexual need. Touching between humans isn't just sexual, or shouldn't be. Unfortunately, in US society they are linked. In many cultures, it is acceptable for women to hold hands, embrace, touch, and not be considered in any kind of lesbian relationship. I think many people in our society are hurting like you are from the lack of being able to just touch or be touched without being perceived as making sexual advances. I think that is what is happening with your housemate. You share a space and it goes against the human grain to not be able to touch, by hugging, a pat, a handhold. I was a virgin until I was 32 and married. I had many friends and housemates, but no touching. Then I married and began an active sex life. I saw for myself how much I enjoyed just being touched by another human - not sexually. I have read that for that reason alone massage has become popular in our culture. Even if it is a stranger, it is another human being touching your skin. Research is showing that it does have a positive effect on your emotional well-being. I wish we could be more touching in our society without it being construed as sexual and inappropriate....
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