[depressedandlonely]

I am so confused about my true sexuality. I know i have feeling for women. I always find myself thinking and fantasizing about attractive women like celebrities. But the confusing part is i don't know whether i am attracting to them in a romantically/physically way or am i just simply looking for an affectionate, caring mother figure in my life to be my surrogate mother. Me and my mom never get along well at all while i was growing up. She and me always fight and argue with eachother. Sometime i simply want to be held by those women i am attracting to. Yet sometime i want to kiss them, and to be intimated with them. I am always find myself falling for heterosexual woman that have authority figure over me. They are my ex-therapist, teacher and professors and even the librarian at my school. I just never falling for a woman that are attracting to another woman. I keep repeating the same vicious cycle over and over again and getting myself hurt in the end.