This is not the normalization I was looking for...

I recently joined a forum related to my paraphilia, and noticed that someone posted a link to a podcast in which they were joking about plushophilia.
The podcast didn't bother me at all. What really made me feel hurt was the comments people made about us being "fat, smelly men living in our parents' house basement". I am neither fat, not smelly, and I am pursuing a higher education...
It really gets to me, and I know it shouldn't, because they are the comments of people who just react, or have strong convictions. The plushophiles I know have jobs, and live on their own too. I have read the post of some who are married too. A lot are college students.
In other words, I feel a bit frustrated and disappointed. I don't know what's so "gross" about plushophilia. Yeah, it is adults boinking stuffed animals, but, come on, those people need to be more open minded about things.
I am not going to change my paraphilia at all, because it is rewarding to me, but thoughts like those from other people make me feel like I am some kind of monster at times, even though I know I am not doing anything wrong or immoral. Sometimes I feel like I am never going to be understood, thanks to those uncivil comments from very callous people, who can't see the harm they are creating. I know, it is probably our fault for posting on a forum... We should have known better..

Ignorance is alive and doing quite well in the world. There will always be those who need to make others feel bad so that they can feel good about themselves. It's just the way it is. Yes, it would be nice if those people were more open minded, but they're not... and that's OK. They are who they are, just like you and me and everyone else. The hard part lies in not buying-in to their story. That's to say, not believing their cruel words and letting them hurt you. IS what they had to say TRUE? NO? Well then, you can see how ignorant they are and laugh off their misguided attempt to make you feel like less of a person than you really are. See those people as they truly are and let it go. What they have to say can only hurt you if you believe the things they say. Otherwise, they might just as well be telling you fairy tales, for their malicious words are just as real.

Do YOU think plushophilia is gross? Yeah, me neither. Are you hurting anyone? NO? Well, are you TRYING to hurt anyone? Huh! I didn't think so. Let me get this straight. Unlike those that tend to mock and demean and hurt, YOU are just being you and are hurting no one? I don't know about you, but I'd much rather be around someone that can just be themself instead of someone who needs to hurt another person to be OK with themself.

That's kinda crazy isn't it? Why would a person need to hurt someone else in order to happy?

It's rather amazing if you think about it. How many faces does ignorance wear? Sometimes it damned hard to recognize it for what it is because it's such a great chameleon.

Sukothefox, please try to be OK with yourself JUST as you are. Don't believe any of the hateful, ignorant things other people might spew at you in an attempt to make you feel less than who you really are. Recognize their ignorance and know that they are just ordinary people who are doing only what they know to do. Know that they have not learned to know themseves for who they truly are... and let their words go past your ears as if they were not heard, for they mean nothing.

BE yourself and like who you are... The alternatives are NOT acceptable!

I wish for you self confidence and happiness,

Dan

People are ignorant. If something makes you happy, then be happy.

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Thank you very much, both of you.
I appreciate what you say as very true and poignant.
I am very sensitive, and I can get self-confidence, but sometimes I have sensitive moments where things just affect me. I need to stop letting it happen, and have a thicker skin.
People are ignorant, and now that I look at the stereotype, I am nowhere near a "fat, smelly middle-aged basement dweller". I am an adult, but very slim, short, and I actually have hygene (except that my hair is messy, lol). Oh, I have zero pimples btw xp
There is nothing wrong with pimples, since they are a normal part of adolescence. But I am not a teenager anymore, and well, they simply went away.
Some describe my face after I shave as "very pretty", "young looking", "beautiful". I know, it sounds like I brag, but I just want to show how I deviate from the plushophile stereotype remarkably. The only thing that is accurate is the adult part
I will try to be more self confident, I need to.
I remember that in my Theories of Personality class ar college I read about Erich Fromm, and he stated that humans have some escape mechanisms (similar to Freud's defense mechanisms, but these are used by normal people). One of the escape mechanisms was called "automaton conformity", and it means that some people feel lonely, because the human condition has alienated us from nature. Then, in the case of the mechanism of automaton conformity, people seek to fit in in a group, be it a sports team, a religious sect, or a gang. The book mentions how this escape mechanism clearly alleviates people's loneliness, but that there was a big price to pay: The loss of the self.
It really got to me. I totally agreed with it.
We need to be ourselves more often, because through that we can inspire others, and show them that there is nothing wrong with the self as long as it harms none.
But more importantly, we are going to be happier, and more productive.
Plushophilia is something that has been with me ever since I have memory, and I have always felt attraction towards stuffed animals, or stuffed animal-looking cartoon characters, like pokemon. Of course, I also feel attraction towards women and men, since my sexual orientation is Bisexual, and it dominates. But plushophilia is a part of me too, and a part I will always accept and embrace, despite what some say.

Yes, well, having a thicker skin is certainly MUCH harder to do in real life when someone is saying or doing hurtful, malicious things to you. That's for sure. But, I dunno... I think that you ARE going to feel hurt... initially. But, well, sometimes I think it takes a little while, but you need to just sit yourself down and have a long, honest talk with yourself about how distorted you're thinking... SURE people say really STUPID, ridiculous things sometimes! But, they CAN'T be talking about YOU! That's because YOU aren't the person they're describing. They MUST BE terribly misguided and mistaken!
Look, even if you ARE a "fat, smelly, middle-aged basement dweller", what makes that a BAD thing??? Honestly, how you look doesn't make one little bit of difference. What's in your heart? Who are you REALLY? THAT is what's important. Your outward appearance is of no concern unless you want it to be.
My goodness. You don't have to explain yourself to ANYBODY! Not HERE, not at home, not at work... not anywhere. (That sounds like it should be in a Dr. Suess book somewhere! )

Anyway, I'm carrying on too much here as usual.

I guess I just wanted you to know that, well, to quote the poet William Ernest Henley:

I am the master of my fate.
I am the captain of my soul.

No one can take that away from you if you sincerely believe it's true.

Dan

I agree with what's been said. Ignorance is an opiate for the masses (yeah, I totally ripped off a Karl Marx quote there, but we needn't pull that up). Many, instead of bothering to understand something foreign to them, simply write it off as "weird" or "bad" or what have you and leave it at that. By simply chalking it up as something "bad," they relieve themselves of the burden of understanding what it is they don't already grasp. Thus, ignorance.

Don't let it get to you. People who are so quick to resort to ignorance in matters that don't concern them aren't worth your time.

Yeah, people retort to ignorant comments whenever they see something they don't like. They demonize it and make themselves feel superior by trying to make others feel bad.
But well, that's our species right there.
Thanks for all the responses, they were well articulated and honest.
I feel better now, and I wonder what made me so vulnerable at that moment.