[nidji]

Hello,
Me and my bf love each other very much, and we very open about everything, we also can discuss and talk about almost everything including this issue.
my bf have fat fetish and he sometimes cant get hard enough because iam not fat enough, i completely understand that fantasy is hard to kills almost impossible, and we tried to do things like put pilllow under me to make me look fat or pretending i gained so much weight and ect, sometimes it works sometimes we have to tried really hard to make it works.

i dont want to put so much pressures on him but its effectig my self esteem, i have body image issue and this thing not good for me.

any sugestion regarding this issue would be so much appreciated

[growlithing]

First off, your body is yours regardless of who it does and doesn't turn on. There are lots of people who would probably love your body. The fact that you "aren't fat enough" for him is a problem with him and not you.

Second, don't gain weight for him. Do not change your body stop try and please someone else. You deserve to have someone recognize and cherish the body you have, not try to make you lose or gain weight. If you are losing or gaining weight to satisfy a partner, that's a good indication that you are being emotionally abused.

Thirdly, if he's serious about fixing this, he needs professional help to try and combat this because having a fetish for a certain body type to the point where you can't get off without that particular type is bad news for you or anyone he dates. But do NOT change yourself for this guy or anyone but you.

[hamster-bamster]

You post a Craigslist ad asking to swap boyfriends with a girl whose bf believes that she is too fat. Then you get 365 replies in the first week of posting. Without renewing the ad, you embark on testing one potential new boyfriend per day in the coming year. I bet that after the first 30 days of testing, your bf will have lost his fat fetish for good.

[Spiced]

Perhaps you should sit down with your boyfriend and just stress that, while you want to make him as happy as possible, you hope that he wants to do the same for you in return.

Let him know that you're concerned about your physical image and that you're having trouble meeting his needs. Weight-gaining is a very giving thing because it's difficult to drop it all afterwards, whereas it's easy as pie (unsure if pun intended..) to put it all on.

Why don't you look into alternate means? When you mentioned pillow-stuffing to give the illusion that you've gained weight, it sounded very similar to me because my main sexual preference is body inflation. I'm unsure myself how I've become interested in it (a lot of the reason I'm here) but you can look into inflatable suits and balloon-stuffing to essentially provide the same illusion that you're gaining weight.

A lot of people in the inflation scene invest in rubber/latex suits to wear underneath clothing and then inflate. Perhaps that's something you could look into? I've tried it myself and I've found it to be quite a therapeutic feeling sometimes, but it would definitely be something to look into for you guys and you may find that in-between where you're both happy. You can keep a physical image you're happy with and your boyfriend can still become aroused by the sight of you becoming bigger (or inflating).

That's just my two cents, though.

I hope you pair can come to a good conclusion.