Losing virginity on drugs

lunatic soul · Sep 17, 2014 at 11:26 AM

Is it good or bad idea?
Im scared of sex, Im scared of pain. And I decided yhat I want sex with my bf.
Has anyone had sex on drugs?

hamster-bamster · Sep 17, 2014 at 11:41 AM

Drugs are too big of a category for any meaningful discussion. What options do you have in mind?

If you are scared of pain, maybe try it after you both have relaxed in a sauna - your pain threshold would be temporarily changed. It would be relaxing and hopefully great and yet memorable because you won't be using mind-altering substances. Sauna/steam beath/Korean forgot-how-they-call-it
are all good choices.

Angel of Bedlam · Sep 17, 2014 at 12:32 PM

I don't think this is a good idea. I've done that a lot before. Never ended well.

lunatic soul · Sep 17, 2014 at 12:49 PM

I want to have sex under mdma, it takes away pain and anxiety.
I have trauma when my first boyfriend was trying to rape me so I always scared of sex and I want to change it. I cant get over it.

Angel of Bedlam · Sep 17, 2014 at 01:55 PM

I don't think that will change it. I was molested when I was younger and I had the opposite issue. Rather than being scared of sex, I thought of it as the only kind of attention I deserve.

I think finding someone who is patient and who deserves your trust and love is better than covering it up with drugs.

AppalachianAxis · Sep 17, 2014 at 02:47 PM

I'm going to have to go with bad idea, not an absolutely horrendous idea mind you, but not the best option IMO. It seems to me (and goodness knows I'm no expert) that you should feel relaxed enough around your partner to not feel that medication would be necessary. Secondly, it might make your partner a bit uncomfortable, as if they aren't making you feel comfy enough on their own, or that they would be somehow taking advantage of you. That's just my two cents anyway, but I reiterate, I'm no expert.

lunatic soul · Sep 18, 2014 at 12:54 AM

I know that first time sex almost never is good and its painful but next times will be good so I want take something to not feel this pain and anxiety.
My boyfriend is patient and very good to me but Im afraid of traumatic experience again. The only thing which scares me is pain. It makes me want to escape while making love.

hamster-bamster · Sep 18, 2014 at 01:01 AM

It depends - not every woman felt pain. I did not feel any pain, nor was there any blood. If you are anxious, you can take a benzo one time, I guess - one time won't be habit forming.

hamster-bamster · Sep 18, 2014 at 01:22 AM

OTC drugs such as ibuprofen are recommended before waxing. I have never done waxing, so I cannot comment, but that is a typical recommendation FWIW.

Old prescription drugs that prevent pain in a mild way are Baclofen and Elavil.

Yoda · Sep 18, 2014 at 01:41 AM

Lubrication will help. Some KY.
Don't use vaseline with condoms though.

lunatic soul · Sep 19, 2014 at 04:00 AM

Thanks everyone for suggestions.

I told my boyfriend that Im virgin and he was so happy he will be first man for me and I hate it! I regret I told him Im virgin but I cant take it back. I hate that he thinks that I belong to him and I said if he will think that way I will sleep with another men too just not to belong to him.
I told him I will take pain killers. He wasnt happy about it but he has no choice.
Now I dont know if I want to sleep with him.
Please tell me that if I slept with him it doesnt mean that I belong to him.
He said-great that you have no experience I like it. So I started to tell him about making love with other men without sex at the end.
I know Im weird.

hamster-bamster · Sep 19, 2014 at 10:35 AM

The motivation sounds lukewarm at this juncture, so probably not. Meaning, since you are not so sure, there is no point in proceeding.

Sep 19, 2014 at 12:38 PM

Mmmm, I have a lot of doubts about this but I'll keep those to myself and offer one suggestion. It seems like a local anesthetic might be preferable to oral/systemic painkillers. Novocaine or something like?
I don't think sex has to be painful the first time with a skillful and caring lover. I can't help wondering why you want to have sex if you're afraid of it.

~Christina · Sep 19, 2014 at 08:42 PM

Unless you really want to have sex with him.. why bother? You seem hellbent on losing your virginity. Whats the rush? Last I knew there isnt a "best used by date"

Best wishes

hamster-bamster · Sep 19, 2014 at 11:28 PM

"Last I knew there isn't a "best used by date""

!!!!!

hamster-bamster · Sep 19, 2014 at 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by George H.

Mmmm, I have a lot of doubts about this but I'll keep those to myself and offer one suggestion. It seems like a local anesthetic might be preferable to oral/systemic painkillers. Novocaine or something like?
I don't think sex has to be painful the first time with a skillful and caring lover. I can't help wondering why you want to have sex if you're afraid of it.

I think that Lidocaine is the form of novocaine you have in mind. There is a local anesthetic that numbs the area to be injected with a vaccine and it is being used in some kids. I do not know how it would help with defloration, though - no idea. But such a local cream does exist. There is also a cream that dentists put on gums before making the heavy-hitter anesthetic injection. It is probably also a form of novocaine.

But given that the expense of buying those - possibly, prescription-only - creams can be altogether avoided, this is probably unnecessary information.

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lunatic soul Grand Member Member Since Aug 2014 Location: somewhere Posts: 906 9 55 hugs given	Sep 17, 2014 at 11:26 AM #1 Is it good or bad idea? Im scared of sex, Im scared of pain. And I decided yhat I want sex with my bf. Has anyone had sex on drugs?
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Angel of Bedlam Grand Member Member Since Oct 2013 Location: Lincoln, NE Posts: 962 10 1 hugs given	Sep 17, 2014 at 12:32 PM #3 I don't think this is a good idea. I've done that a lot before. Never ended well. __________________ Am I the only one I know, waging my wars behind my face and above my throat? Diagnosed: BPD PTSD
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lunatic soul Grand Member Member Since Aug 2014 Location: somewhere Posts: 906 9 55 hugs given	Sep 17, 2014 at 12:49 PM #4 I want to have sex under mdma, it takes away pain and anxiety. I have trauma when my first boyfriend was trying to rape me so I always scared of sex and I want to change it. I cant get over it.
	Reply With Quote

lunatic soul Grand Member Member Since Aug 2014 Location: somewhere Posts: 906 9 55 hugs given	Sep 18, 2014 at 12:54 AM #7 I know that first time sex almost never is good and its painful but next times will be good so I want take something to not feel this pain and anxiety. My boyfriend is patient and very good to me but Im afraid of traumatic experience again. The only thing which scares me is pain. It makes me want to escape while making love.
	Reply With Quote

hamster-bamster Account Suspended Member Since Sep 2011 Location: Northern California Posts: 14,805 (SuperPoster!) 12 3,729 hugs given	Sep 18, 2014 at 01:01 AM #8 It depends - not every woman felt pain. I did not feel any pain, nor was there any blood. If you are anxious, you can take a benzo one time, I guess - one time won't be habit forming.
	Reply With Quote

hamster-bamster Account Suspended Member Since Sep 2011 Location: Northern California Posts: 14,805 (SuperPoster!) 12 3,729 hugs given	Sep 18, 2014 at 01:22 AM #9 OTC drugs such as ibuprofen are recommended before waxing. I have never done waxing, so I cannot comment, but that is a typical recommendation FWIW. Old prescription drugs that prevent pain in a mild way are Baclofen and Elavil.
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Yoda who reads this, anyway? Member Since Oct 2006 Location: Appalachia Posts: 9,968 17	Sep 18, 2014 at 01:41 AM #10 Lubrication will help. Some KY. Don't use vaseline with condoms though. __________________ The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well. anonymous
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hamster-bamster Account Suspended Member Since Sep 2011 Location: Northern California Posts: 14,805 (SuperPoster!) 12 3,729 hugs given	Sep 19, 2014 at 10:35 AM #12 The motivation sounds lukewarm at this juncture, so probably not. Meaning, since you are not so sure, there is no point in proceeding.
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Anonymous37781 Guest Posts: n/a	Sep 19, 2014 at 12:38 PM #13 Mmmm, I have a lot of doubts about this but I'll keep those to myself and offer one suggestion. It seems like a local anesthetic might be preferable to oral/systemic painkillers. Novocaine or something like? I don't think sex has to be painful the first time with a skillful and caring lover. I can't help wondering why you want to have sex if you're afraid of it.
	Reply With Quote

~Christina Legendary Wise Elder Community Liaison Member Since Jul 2011 Location: Tennessee Posts: 22,450 (SuperPoster!) 12 12.7k hugs given	Sep 19, 2014 at 08:42 PM #14 Unless you really want to have sex with him.. why bother? You seem hellbent on losing your virginity. Whats the rush? Last I knew there isnt a "best used by date" Best wishes __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
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hamster-bamster Account Suspended Member Since Sep 2011 Location: Northern California Posts: 14,805 (SuperPoster!) 12 3,729 hugs given	Sep 19, 2014 at 11:28 PM #15 "Last I knew there isn't a "best used by date"" !!!!!
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