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#1
this is tough
its embarrasing and shameful i was sexually abused by my father and working thru it with T when i left home i didnt hesitate to sleep with a guy mostly friends who wanted more my T said its cos i wanted to be loved and this was only way i understood it to be i still dont know how to get that caring feeling from guys i want to care for me and love me my bf dont complain he loves out sex life but i guess i want it to change in that i dont want this to be the only way i get that feeling. does anyone else feel this way or am i just a disgusting freak |
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2007
Posts: 1,207
17 |
#2
((((((((((Bronee))))))))))))))))))
you are NOT a disgusting freak.....and i feel the same way and last time i checked im not that much of a disgusting freak.... sweety your wonderful and i know your bf thinks so as well start out slow...and let your bf know how your feeling..maybe start over? with baby steps? believe me if he loves you he will understand love, Inny __________________ "You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#3
yes bronee, i felt the same way when i was younger, felt the only way to be loved was for people to get 'that close' to me and i was abused too by a family friend.
sounds bizarre that people would want to feel loved that way, guess that's how it works and no you are not disgusting freak in the slightest. low self esteem is another symptom of abuse my marriage has lasted 19years and i still find it hard to believe he loves me, and still crave that loved feeling. although i am getting better lol, dont know what took me so long love you jinny xoxoxoxoxoxo |
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Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2004
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,406
20 |
#4
(((((bronee)))))))
No you are not disgusting!! I have felt the same way with myself. I do agree with Jinny that part of this is low self esteem. Love ya, Snowy __________________ SNOWFLAKE |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: AZ
Posts: 8,663
20 |
#5
Bronee,
I am working through the same issus. I used sex as a weapon in my old days, because I thought that was the only way I man could like me. I was in a relationship where he wanted sex much more than I did and I just did it because I felt like it was my obligation as a woman. I was his "vessel". That's how it felt. I've made a rule for myself out of all of this. I won't sleep with a guy from the start now. I used to. I'd sleep with him and then he'd like me and we'd have a relationship. I've decided now that the next guy I date will have to wait for sex until I know he's in it for more than that. Its not weird to feel this way at all. In fact, all my girlfriends have felt the same way at some point in their lives. __________________ |
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