[RosettaStone]

So I've been with this guy for over a year now. And when we moved in, I started to notice something strange about him. First my bottle of baby oil ended up in our bathroom and slowly decreased daily. Now of course I assumed he was masturbating. I didn't rush to confront him. I'm extremely open-minded sexually and I understand it's what guys do, so whatever, not a big deal. But anytime I would randomly ask, as I often do with anything pertaining to sex, when was the last time he masturbated he said it had been months. I figured ok, a guy whose uncomfortable admitting it, not the end of the world. So one day he asked me to fix his phone for him. And while using his web browser to look up some solutions, I came across recent browser history. First I found searches for escort services and personal adds. Ok, I'm not gonna jump to conclusions, so I look farther. It's been going on since before our relationship. Ok strange, enough that it makes me uncomfortable. So I addressed it, he said he only looks at the pictures and it's like amateur porn for him. I explained that it still made me uncomfortable but if that was what he liked then I'd send him pictures of me. And I did (like I said, I'm open-minded. Our relationship improved. And he stopped looking. But life isn't just about sex and life caused some creases and things got tough. So I stopped taking the pictures and he started looking again. And after having access to his phone again, he gives me full access (lock code and all). I looked and came across some searches for tranny porn and bbw's. Once again I'm open-minded. But I'm not sure what to do? He gives me full access. But when I discussed watchin masturbation he denies it. When I talk about sex, he gets sheepish. But when we have sex I can do whatever I want to his body, no questions asked. He looks at porn in the morning and says he's "going to the bathroom." If he's home alone it continues throughout the day. When I suggested watching porn together, he said watching it together "isn't his thing." Like I said I'm open-minded, where do I go from here? Suggestions, or help understanding?

[healingme4me]

He's not open to watching porn, together?

I'm open minded, myself, but I'm curious why more than just isn't his thing. It's not interactive is it?(the porn he's'watching'?

[norwegianwoman]

Well, I have never really understood why anyone would watch porn or whatever they do when masturbating together - it's a very personal thing, even when you're in a relationship. I mean, you can masturbate with your partner or share fantasies for foreplay etc., but somet things just feel private. But it's weird that he's not honest about it, have you told him you have no problems with him masturbating or watching porn? Maybe he believes you will get angry.

From what I deduce from the little you have told us, he seems to kind of be turned on by sexual promiscuity/deviance, or taboos if you like. Prostitutes=promiscious and a taboo. Granny, tranny and bbw (at least some of it)=taboo, and sometimes promiscious. Or risque, if you like that word better. In other words, he gets off because it's a bit "forbidden" and very sexual. Much like how kids are obsessed with sex when it's "forbidden" (which is also why preaching abstinence will never work). I think it is completely harmless, but maybe you should try suggesting (or simply trying) some roleplaying, for example? Something to spice up the sex life a bit, make it a bit more taboo/risque.