Hi! I'm new, and i would really like some help.

Hello..I had a lot of issues with sexual addiction while i was a child (hear me out, i'll explain) and i would consider myself better, but still stuck in one similar cycle.
I read that 82% of sexual addicts had family disorders and were sexual abused. I did have a dysfunctional family, i had a step father who favored my half-brother (full to him) over me. My blood father was in and out of jail (nothing serious he's a extremely kind man) and my mother was judgmental, uncaring to most of my issues and distant. I lived with my grandma only for many years until my mom came back for the last 5. I was habitually bullied in elementary school. No one ever helped me at home or school, i would beat myself physically a lot. (Segway)-- I think it all started when i found this book on puberty, sex and our bodies. After reading it, i remember that i drew genitals and breasts on paper and even all over most of the books we had. I would scribble words out and replace them with sexual terms and it only got worse from then on. Thinking about sex even helped me fall asleep at night. This may have been curiosity, but i don't believe it was very health. This all may have been a stress reliever from school.

First year of middle school i had my first online boyfriend. He was 3 years older than i was and on a daily basis i would engage in sexual role playing (cyber sex), me being the one who asked 90% of the time. The rest in a summary, after that i went on to have 15 more computer relationships with older men (usually 18 no more than 20) in the course of middle school. All of them for the sake of sex. Most of them, i was cheating. I would think about sex non-stop (even in the middle of class or working on a test), i would not engage in any other activities that weren't cyber sex or masturbation. Sex was my life. My views on not caring who it was, as long as i got some pleasure went away when i met my ex. (in the beginning, i was aiming just to use him too) but I actually fell in love with him. I was unable to think about anyone else sexually but him. It broke off after 10 months and during the last month, i was entering high school and met a man i started dating 3 days later after breaking up with my ex. We are still together and it's been 2 years. Everything is steady and i am very loyal but some of my sexual tendencies still linger.

I'm now 17 and I continue to habitually masturbate (3 sessions every day), I don't think about sex anymore during class time (keeping with my grades) but on tests and quiet time they are all dedicated to sex, as well as my falling asleep. Sexual thoughts still helps me go to sleep.

Please do not judge me due to my age, i am legitimately concerned and believe i had and still have a problem. I would very much like help with my current tendencies.

Hello Quin100: Welcome to PsychCentral! PC is a great place to find support as well as to obtain mental health related information. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more you'll gain from the time you spend here!

Sexual addictions can be difficult to resolve. I recently watched a video on YouTube uploaded by California therapist, Kati Morton, where she talked about excessive masturbation as being a form of self-abuse. I, of course, don't know if this could apply to you. But it is an indication of how complex these sorts of sex-related problems can be.

You don't mention, in your post, if you are seeing a therapist. From my perspective, seeing a therapist who is knowledgeable in, & experienced with, working with persons who have sexual addictions would be a potentially valuable step for you to take. This is clearly something that has been developing with you for a long time. It will take time to sort out why it developed & what you can do about it.

I wish you well...

Thank you! I haven't seen a therapist, i haven't even told my mom. I highly doubt knowing my mom that she would believe anything i said. And/or she would try to give me some type of advice (which isn't very helpful) and send me on my way. If i can schedule with a therapist someday in the future, i will. Present works too

I agree with this, see a therapist. Sexual addictions can be difficult to deal with on your own, just like any addictions. If you don't want to tell your parents the details you could just tell them you're feeling depressed.

Thank you! i will try!