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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: ohio
Posts: 81
8 119 hugs
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Dec 13, 2015 at 07:46 PM
#1
Okay so I'm legit so confused.. Am I bi-curious or legit bi or lesbian?! I think I like my Bestfriend and she's bi... She told me she loves me and I do too but idk if I like actually "love love" her like that. Like I love her like a sister and Bestfriend, but do I like like her? Like would I date her??? We've talked about it and she's all like "you'll find your sexuality it's okay, I've known I was bi since I was little... You'll figure it out" and but like idk if I like her. Or if I even like other girls... Or maybe is it "I want what I can't have" I thought I liked my other guy friend but he has a new gf... Again... And is it bad if I do like her?! I'm so so so lost and scared and ugh advice?!
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 Anonymous37780, Anonymous37833, FireIsland123
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Dec 13, 2015 at 07:53 PM
#2
Hello there. Relax, breathe, exhale. This is not a race. This is your life and what do you really want is what matters. So go out together to a movie and grab a bite to eat. That is something normal people do. And then you can hang out and chat or whatever. You instinctively know after 3 outtings if you are attracted to the other person sexually or not. And that is about the size of it. Don't get together out of curiosity. Not is not right nor fair. There are people that are just snuggle and hug buddies. Yes, that is true! There are many different types of people in the world. Just be kind to yourself and quit trying to figure it all out. I hope this advice helps. tc
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| FireIsland123, xx_tpm-life_xx
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 starfruit504, xx_tpm-life_xx
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Member
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 93
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Dec 13, 2015 at 10:09 PM
#3
Lots of questions. But only you can answer them. Take your time. It's not a high school math exam. No one is going to tell you to put your pencil down. Most important, there are no wrong answers. Your sexuality is a gift, not a burden. Use that gift to explore and find what makes you truly happy.
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| xx_tpm-life_xx
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DBTDiva, xx_tpm-life_xx
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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: ohio
Posts: 81
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Dec 13, 2015 at 10:14 PM
#4
Thanks guys... I'm just v scared... I haven't ever had a Bf/gf yet... Or my first kiss obviously I don't want to screw anything up
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2013
Location: Wichita, Ks
Posts: 3,535
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Dec 15, 2015 at 11:00 AM
#5
Keep something in mind also. Sexuality isn't as easy as fitting into a nice little category. It's a sliding scale with all kinds of gray in the middle. Like everyone has said, it's most important that you are comfortable and true to yourself.
__________________ Helping to create a kinder, gentler world by flinging poo. |
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xx_tpm-life_xx
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: USA South
Posts: 507
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Dec 15, 2015 at 04:49 PM
#6
Quote:
 I think what is important is figuring out how you feel about your friend, moreso than what your exact sexual orientation might be? Webgoji is totally right, most people don't fit into a rigid category. I would just pay attention to how you feel when you are with your friend that you might like as more than a friend but aren't sure yet. When I was a teenager, I realized that in the past I had crushes on girls (I'm a cisgender woman) but hadn't realized it. Do you get that stomach flip kind of feeling? That is always how I identify that I like someone as more than a friend, that nervous, giggly, "oh he/she is so cool/great/whatever." That feeling that something is different with this person than with most other people. __________________ Borderline PD/Major Depression/Anxiety  Living well in recovery from mental illness is possible!
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| xx_tpm-life_xx
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xx_tpm-life_xx
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Member
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: ohio
Posts: 81
8 119 hugs
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Dec 15, 2015 at 07:47 PM
#7
I'm not sure! It's so confusing... I don't know how I feel really... I'd be her first relationship and shed be my first girl /actual relationship\... I'm so lost. Thank you so very much though DBTDiva
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since May 2014
Location: Somewhere/Anywhere/Nowhere
Posts: 1,516
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Dec 16, 2015 at 06:40 AM
#8
Quote:
I agree. I also just throw away any labels. I like whomever I like and I don't need a label to define me.....CONSTRAIN me! I find that most sexual orientation labels are exclusionary rather than inclusionary. I've found that adopting any label just makes me feel like I have to be a certain way and I can't just be me. And the interesting thing is that I've found that it's the non-straight people who care the most about my sexual orientation. I have yet to encounter one straight person who cares what I am. So just be yourself and don't worry about a label. __________________ Will work for bananas.
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