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Jun 01, 2016 at 12:55 AM
#1
Nowadays you don't hear about it as much, because of the meds out there but it still exists. My husband is very susceptible to bouts of ED. It can be nerves or meds. He has tried Viagra and Cialis with varied success. He seems to do best when he is low stress and not taking any meds.
The problem is that when we get into a run of this, I cannot help but internalize it and feel down on myself. Ever since I hit middle age, my libido is pretty high. I will get very irritable and having crying jags, it becomes very noticible to others. It isn't like he isn't willing to have other sexual activity....but after while I just need that certain connection. It is hard because if I get nasty it can make it worse. We have open communication, but I feel like there is something wrong with me that I let this affect my mood and self esteem so deeply. I guess it is the borderline in me that feels this rejection.... Any tips on how to cope? |
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 Lost_in_the_woods
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Grand Poohbah
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Member Since Dec 2013
Location: Brokedown Palace
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Jun 01, 2016 at 02:41 AM
#2
(((HUGS)))April. Sorry you guys are in a rough patch.
 It seems like you answered your own question... I mean nothing is ever gonna be perfect that we must learn thru radical acceptance, but other than that you are as accepting of his issues , also able to accept your own isdues as well and aware that the intimacy in your relationship thrives the most when your SO is not stressed. And you know your needs. All the ingredients are there, so what is mucking up the works..... you know that as well...  BORDERLINE SELF SABOTAGE  unfortunately, I am also well too aquanted with this vicious cycle.  The only advice I have is b kind and gentle with both yourself and your SO and talk to your T about doing some extra hard hitting on emotion regulation skills. (back to the drawing board..yet again. BPD is a real B****)  hope things get better soon.   
__________________ "The woods are lovely, dark, and deep But I have promises to keep And miles to go before I sleep And miles to go before I sleep" |
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