Hypersexuality, always thinking about sex

I'll start off describing myself. I'm a 19 year old straight male who has lots of depression and anxiety. Couple that with OCD and ASD and I'm usually a mess of a person. For about a year now, I've had intense sexual urges that are very frequent and distracted. It all started very quickly. First of all, I've never had sex before, and since I was homeschooled, I was very rarely around any girls, much less ones that I was interested in. So for quite a while, I was never interested in looking sex or anything related to sex. I still had obsessive thoughts (as part of OCD), but never looked at porn, fantasized or masturbated. Then, within the last two years, my sexual urges have skyrocketed. Ever since I had first looked at porn (I prefer animated like hentai, since I find it much sexier), I became fascinated with everything about sex. I began masturbating shortly after that and, since then, can not stop. Sometimes I can be doing something completely unrelated to sex, yet will continue to obsess over it and have the urge to masturbate. At first, masturbation helped relieve the stress and I was satisfied. However, I began to do it more and more and more, to the point where I'm looking at porn and masturbating every day, sometimes several times a day. If my urge is really intense, it becomes somewhat painful until I orgasm. It's very distracting in my daily routine and goes against my moral guidelines. Even though I have standards, my natural urges usually win the battle against my morals.

Sex has always been something I was obsessed with. Lately has just been the worst it's ever been. When I was young, even about 4 or 5, I always loved being naked and playing with myself. I would encourage my friends, whether male or female, to also get naked because it felt better. I don't consider it abuse since it was always with kids my age, or just on my own accord.

I'm very eager to have sex, even though I want to wait until I find someone who I really love. I do have someone I'm interested in, but she is out of state and a couple years younger than me. I'm also very attracted to fictional characters, as its one of my biggest fetishes, but obviously I can't be intimate with them besides in my imagination. My question here is, how do I deal with these intense urges when I don't have a girl in my life I can have sex with? It is very intrusive in my daily life and usually makes me feel bad afterwards. I want to have sex really badly, but don't have a girl that I'm close with that is close to me geographically. I'm also very afraid that, before I can develop a relationship with someone, I'm gonna jump right into the sexual desires, scaring them off unless they too have these urges.

My obsession with sex has really taken over my rational thinking, and I really need help to cope with it. I appreciate all the help in advance.

Hello alwaysanxious247: Unfortunately there's not much I can offer with regard to your concerns. However I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

I, too, have this problem. However, there is no magic pill or treatment to turn off one's libido. Sure, some meds can dull it, but since it's a basic need, it won't go away. I feel for you and hope we both find a solution to this problem.

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There's nothing wrong with thinking about sex since your 19. When I was your age (boy I sound old now), I thought about sex and fetishes alot. I started having strong sexual urges when I was 10, the first time I touched myself. I'm in my 30's and I can relate to what you're going through. I was home-schooled as well when I was younger. I never dated any girls at all and had trouble approaching them til I was in my late 20s. I never had sex at all either. I'm still waiting for the right person to do it with. It's very difficult to find another person who understands what I go through and how I feel. I had a friend who I was interested in and I too was also afraid to let them know about my desires. I told her eventually and she understood as she was the same and was not judge-mental. The best thing I can tell you is to try to keep yourself busy, not think about sex and have the willpower to not masturbate too often. Try to cut down to once a day and gradually work your way to once every other day and it should subside. Good luck to you.

IMHO!!!! Only!

Couple of things. You state that you have "standards"....then ur natural urges win.
You answered your own question. It's natural to masturbate especially as a teen ager Bec your exploring your own body. Do me a favor.
Go masturbate today & afterwards pat urself on the back. You deserve it, you did nothing wrong & it was awesome. Ride that wave of positive energy afterwards & give yourself a break from your standards....which are probably telling you "you did a bad thing!"

I think if you let this energy flow thru you & use the positive feelings from it, you won't want to masturbate as often.
You might see it as "bad" but you pine for it & what do we want then?? We want more of the bad.
Make sense?
So don't make it into something that's wrong or bad. The feelings from an orgasm can last all day!

So it sounds like you wanto get into dating. And you're also very aware of yourself & the possibility of something going too fast just for sex. That's pretty smart of you to put that together.

My suggestion IMHO, careful who you date! Yes there are women out there that will sleep with you right away & want sex as much as you do. So be aware of them & maybe pass them by for a relationship you're looking for.
But if you do get caught up in the heat of the moment.....protect yourself.
Sometimes we aren't thinking clearly then.