Just a little confused.

I have been a sexually curious person since I was a child. I was molested by my grandfather as a child but have since come to terms with my past and moved on. My sex drive has not slowed down and i find that I am looking for safe ways to satisfy my desires. I am married to the love of my life and only want to be intimate with her. I find that my wife does not have the energy to keep up with my sex drive nor would i push her to be like me. The issues is that she is quite the opposite when it comes to sex. She rarely is in the mood and has never let on that she might get urges like I do. I have openly communicated with her about this on many occasions but these conversations leave me beliving that they do more harm than good. I have used masturbation as a way to connect with myself, increase my libido and stay in good health. But now i feel like my wife has branded me a pervert and a deviant...

Some more details that might explain the reason why i have decided to reach out for guidance.

I would never cheat on my wife and dont have any desire to be with another woman in any way. I want to keep my sexual energy up as I ultimately feel so much better and happier when sexually fulfilled. My wife and I often dont have sex for weeks at a time. I used to become frustrated about it after my attempts to be intimate were shot down, but now, i just sleep.

I purchased myself a sex doll a year ago and immediately felt that i had found something that would help return my sexual vigor and give me that satisfied feeling. As you can imagine, when i spoke to my wife about it, our relationship was truly tested. She was heart broken and I was confused. I tried to explain to her the reason why i bought it and the benifits it would provide but after hearing what came out of her mouth, i feel as low as a married man soliciting sex from a prostitute. She even compared me to a pedophile... this brought back pains from my childhood and made me question if i truly was a disgusting pig.

After the ordeal i sold the doll and went to therapy for sexual addiction. This was the biggest waste of money and time. I have a great job, and complete control of my sexual desires. After a few sessions with the therapist he asked me to visit a help group. I considered it but never went. My sex life is still a once every one or two weeks deal and i cant help but feel like ive lost a great part of myself. Why am i seen as the person that needs therapy? I have a healthy sex drive and a desire to keep it. I never told my therapist this and i wish that i did. I want to take back control of my sexuality. I want that amazing feeling i used to get when my wife and i were dating. Now since the sex doll, i fear that my wife will nevet get her sex drive back. She is not as open as i am about sex. I honestly just dont know what to do. I have thought about buying myself another sex doll but that is mainly because my wife and i have hit a wall and sex seems to be nowhere on her radar. I dont see the reason for this dramatic phobia people seem to have about sex dolls, but they are nothing more than fancy masterbation aids... anyway. I want her to see a therapist with me but she is against it... so im confused...

Hello Yujujo: I'm sorry I can't really comment with regard to your concern. Hopefully other members, here on PC, will have some insights to share. However this appears to be your first post here on PC. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!