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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,474
19 
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Feb 19, 2008 at 09:14 AM
#1
I'm 26 and I've only had intercourse a few times, probably five or fewer.
I've only been with one person, my first and only boyfriend. That lasted a year and we went very slowly. Before him I'd had no sexual experience at all. It's been 3 or 4 years since I've broken up with him. I've recently put up a profile on this dating site. I've been chatting with this nice guy. He says sex is important. I told him I wasn't going to have sex unless I know I was going to be with the person a long long time. I also mentioned that I didn't get much enjoyment from sex. He said he would make sex all about me and help me learn to enjoy it. Am I normal in not being very sexual? Do all guys think sex is important? __________________ 
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2007
Location: Washington DC metro area
Posts: 15,865
(SuperPoster!)
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Feb 19, 2008 at 09:41 AM
#2
> Do all guys think sex is important?
Do you ever watch television programs about other kinds of animals? Like moose or elephant seals or herd animals of other kinds? Notice the differences between sexual behavior of males and females? I think males of all kinds have a very strong urge to have sex. It is an evolutionary imperative! With adolescence it becomes very strong. That doesn't mean that men can't learn to be aware of the consequences for you and for themselves, and how to associate more awareness and long-term thinking into their (and your) lives, sexual and otherwise. > He said he would make sex all about me and help me learn to enjoy it. Just make sure it isn't really all about him... 
__________________ Now if thou would'st When all have given him o'er From death to life Thou might'st him yet recover -- Michael Drayton 1562 - 1631 |
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,474
19
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Feb 19, 2008 at 09:54 AM
#3
I'm just wondering if I'm asexual.
I've been aroused by my boyfriend though. Does that mean I'm normal? I don't usually think of sex and I rarely masturbate. I'm thinking I would like to marry an asexual man. Is that even possible? LOL Are there any asexual men out there? I don't seem particularly attracted to either men or women. Any asexual men out there? LOL __________________
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: AZ
Posts: 8,663
20
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Feb 19, 2008 at 10:03 AM
#4
I'd be weary of a man online telling you sex is important. Its like he's saying, wanna date me? Well sex is important......I don't know, that worries me.
For a long time I felt just like you do. Now I'm 29 and love sex with my boyfriend. But he's becoming asexual. Be careful what you wish for lol. I used to wish for an asexual man too. __________________ |
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,474
19
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Feb 19, 2008 at 10:27 AM
#5
I read up more about asexuality. I found a dating site for sexuals. I put up the same profile I had on the other dating site and I responded to an ad from an asexual man. We are similar in age.
I hope I find someone special! __________________
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,474
19
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Feb 19, 2008 at 01:34 PM
#6
Yay! Someone in Ontario responded to my message. Someone from the asexual dating site.
We're chatting and we have some things in common. He is also close to my age. __________________
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 20, 2008 at 09:07 AM
#7
Be very carefull I talk from a nice experience as I met my husband online in a chat room, however I made sure people knew where I was meant to be and at what time and who I was meeting, I would also recommend taking a friend to the first real life meeting ........
Better be to be safe than sorry ! |
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Grand Member
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Some place beyond myself, West Virginia
Posts: 999
17
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Feb 20, 2008 at 03:56 PM
#8
You have to have good sex to know for sure...imo.
If you haven't had an orgasm or been completely excited before sex then it won't be good, and if it's your first times then it gives you a bad idea of how sex is supposed to be. Taking your time for the right person is a good thing. When the right person comes along then sex will be good, you'll be ready and willing and if he cares he WILL make it about you and not so much about himself. Sex is supposed to be about pleasing one another and not yourselves...men can sometimes forget that...but we forgive them. |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: AZ
Posts: 8,663
20
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Feb 20, 2008 at 05:29 PM
#9
Ok you said what I couldn't figure out how to say you0me lol. Thats exactly how I was. I wanted to be asexual until I got with my current boyfriend and fell in love with him and sex with him.
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,840
16
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Mar 02, 2008 at 11:44 AM
#10
no you are not strange or anything like that. Everyone is different and goes through different things in life, some people are sex-a-holics, and some are occasional sex-ers. <----my way of looking at it.
__________________ Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you. |
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Grand Member
Member Since Mar 2008
Posts: 781
16 |
Mar 18, 2008 at 06:19 PM
#11
Have you ever had an orgasm?
Have you ever received oral sex? I agree with one person here - until you have had GOOD sex, you can't really know if you won't like it....if you kwim ;-) Maybe your first boyfriend was just rather selfish in the bedroom. Many younger men don't really know how to take care of a woman, they only care about getting themselves off. |
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