trouble letting my boyfriend know sexual/mental needs

im 18,female, sexual active for almost a year, no meds, using nuva ring, excersizing 5 day a week. i do not drink. i do smoke canibus. smoking cigaretts few days a week when i have an erge to( i can control this erge very well as i do with most of my feelings).

okay so.. iv ben together with him for almost a year. hes my first boyfriend and first sexual partner. we both love our sex and enjoy the same sexual activities.
i dont get as much aroused as i use to and i end up pretty dry in the middle or ending of our sex. i also get bored and am waiting for the end to come once iv climaxed. can i get back into the sex after iv climaxed?
i really would love to multi orgasm but i feel like after iv climaxd my clit becomes numb and like no feeling effects it. can i change this?

i dont tell my boy any of this. im not like embaressed of my "isseues" i just kind of feel like..im asking him to go above and beyond what he feels he shud have to do. i hate making ppl doing more then they have to, no matter who they are because its an annoyance to me to have to go out of my way.
i give my boy oral for long amounts of time,mostly till my mouth and toung have gone numb and im bored of doing it. going to the point of being bored, is that bad because it turns me off?
he doesnt go down on me much and i dont ask him to either. when he does he will tell me to ask him or beg him to first. id really like him to go down on me more. shoukd i ask him or beg him like he tells me to when he decides for himself to do it?
i asked him why he doesnt go down on my much..he said because what i do to him feels to good. to me that was a TERRIBLE and lame excuse i was almost annoyd and angry with that excuse. like for myself, being gone down on is the thing that most like arouses me but my problem is like as soon as a toung touchs me down there its almost to much. is this normal? like i can only recive for about 1-4 min because it feels to good and i have to push him away or times he will keep going at it holding me back from pushing him away wich also really turn me on haha.

most of the time im very satisfied with the sex, but when i get dry or im seeming not to be into it as much as i was before, he make a remark like "your pu**y is getting dry and he will use ky to make things go smoother, which is fine but like.. getting dry isnt my fault. id love to be wet even all the time.
i just get bored fast i think, we dont change positions much unless were rly like having some nice sex wich is about once a week, like when we use toys ect.
we norm have sex 4-5 days a week. im still young, 18 and we do live in his parents house so i think thoes are some factors to our sex cuz tbh id really like to be having alot more.
my boy has chronic pain in his hands and knees, he works quite a bit also. he says hes exausted, this is why we dont have as much sex as we'd like to.
i also have a "illness", not determined. some of his "excuses" or reasonings, upset me even tho i do not want to be upset because i know its silly to be upset over something like a sex session. but this is a tottaly different subject but i do feel it interfears with my sex life a little because he bugs the hell out of me when i dont get what i want sexualy. almost to the point i want to stop having sex immedtiatly and go to bed. but, im nervous and i dont like to cause discomfort or distress so i go on with it.

overall i have a terribly bad communication problem with my boyfriend, hes the one i want to learn from and hear from, know his ideas and ect about everything from sex to beliefes to music and work and evrything. im just so afraid to talk to him and i dont know why half of the time. when i try or try to think of something to say, i forget everything and my mind goes blank like i cannot think and the harder i try the more upset i get and it just ends up me crying. or i saying some stuff like that doesnt even sound like me.
he doesnt make much of an effort to talk abt my feelings unless im having a deppressive episode but even then he doesnt try hard, he will ask whats wrong a few times , a few times bcuz he never gets it out of me. i have a hard time with my feelings and i dont know if he knows this or understand it.

okay! so in conclusion of my essay id like to know/be informed:
how can i become aroused once again after climax
how can i/we arouse myself before sex so im acutlly horny for him before the sex
and how can i stop being so nervous aout this issues so i can bring myself to talk about it with him.

im willing to tell more ofcourse, ill do what ever i can to help myself and help people understand, who want to help me. i have no friends that i talk to in real life bcause i just moved in with him and his family. i started a new high school and evrything. and not being able to talk to him.. it really just puts alot of inward frusteration,anger,sadness on myself and i feel its very unhealthy. dont get me wrong tho im an extremly happy, hyper,energetic person but small things upset me/annoy me and it can last for days.

telling me anymore useful info would be great.

warmth

well if he is telling you that you need to ask or beg him for things maybe you should at least ask for it since he said it turns him on. as for the dryness during sex try a lubricant when you get dry. I personally love the feel of a good lubricant during sex. good luck!

From what I am reading it sounds as though you are saying that love making is taking to long for you and with this you are loosing interest, therefore, your sexual pleasure/satisfaction is suffering..... it that right?

I would suggest that you and your boyfriend go for a few quickies in slightly dangerous (might get seen) places and see if the thrill of getting caught mixed with with the passion of a quickie does any thing for you.

And the most important matter to remember is "COMMUNICATION" - it is the key to sexual satisfaction for both partners..... show & tell at its finest.

thank you bebop. iv ben shy to ask him or tell him what i desire. but iv ben getting better at it by just commingout and blurting it out pretty much lol.if i think about something somuch wether or not to do it,imost likly wont, so this helps.

well Rhapsody what if my boyfriend like rather not do it out in public? i dont want to be like making a move and him belike i dont want to do it "here". its winter now i would deff be up for that sence we do spend alot of time in the woods during the summer. but theres always dressing rooms and such heh. im not fantistic of comming up with ideas,my shyness holds me back alot. imthinking of asking him if thers anything he wants to try. i know he want to try **** haha we have tried like a little but didnt do it, im nervous.im mostly nervous untill like we get into things then im fine its the like starting point, and this is with pretty much everrrything, not even sex related lol.