[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Gabyunbound

You're absolutely right and I appreciate you bringing this up. Luckily this is my day off, but if it hadn't been I'd probably be working (if I hadn't seen your reply first). I didn't have it in me to see that. I just thought, I have to do better. But in the condition I was in yesterday, it was impossible to do better and I lacked the insight to make that decision to not work.

To update, like I said before, I took a klonopin yesterday early afternoon and it relaxed me somewhat but didn't put me to sleep, which it always does.

I had a very difficult day. I was ill. I have been ill.

At around 7:30, I took the 10mg of Zyprexa along with my other night meds and it took some 5 hours for me to get to sleep after that!! My pdoc had said the Zyprexa would put me to sleep! Eventually it did, but those were scary hours, I was afraid I wouldn't sleep at all.

And I was able to sleep in.

I haven't been up for long, but so far so good. I don't feel hyper or antsy, etc., etc. My feelings these last weeks have tended to ramp up as the day has gone on, culminating in horrific evenings and nights. But as I say, so far so good.

I think this has definitely been a mixed episode.

I'll see how I feel the rest of the day. If my mood and behavior go downhill again, I'll not work tomorrow. Though I hate to tell them at the last minute, they might not be able to get coverage. I think I might tell them I can't work now, just in case.

I hope things don't get worse again. I see my pdoc tomorrow.

Thanks again.

Got it.

Having been thru this whole deal, the wise thing for your career and patients is to take a week off. Definitely. It alsolooks like wisdom should there be an investigation. Do it.

Also, the first thing the hospital and state do in these deals is demand a UA. So, only prescribed stuff in the correct dose.

Hugs.

I feel depressed. (see my post in physical check-in)

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Lots of scary money quotes coming to my husband and me for house improvements. Today our realtor came with a flooring representative to help us decide on options. The flooring rep just sent me the full quote. I suppose that since it is for much of our main house, except bathrooms, kitchen and foyer, it would be big $$$, but it is still painful to look at. My husband is out at the moment. He wishes that our current stairway and upstairs carpeting would remain, but there are some serious problem areas in it. For example, my husband had the brilliant idea of putting a tree in our spare room. [I hated that idea from the beginning.] Well, under it is a deep round indentation and an impossible to remove stain. And no, you can't expect a prospective buyer not to notice.

When the realtor and flooring guy came I was so nervous that I started to sweat (anxiety-induced hyperhidrosis). I had to step away for a bit and just let Hubby talk. I keep pushing myself, all the same. The other day, I went to the hair salon for a much needed a haircut. I started sweating at one point there, as well. Usually they offer ice water, but they haven't since the coronavirus. I was thinking of getting my hair colored in Czech Republic (probably less than half the price), but I'm reconsidering because of possible sweating. It's just terrible! I can clench my fists to get through tough stuff, but something often gives. In this case, the sweat flows. As it flows, the anxiety builds.

Oh goodness getting Quotes Home improvements actually make me physically shudder. There isnt much here that would need done if we ever wanted or had to moves , thankfully ..

My Advise on carpet , get something nice, Not so pricey just add a double backing , It will feeling and look rich when someone comes looking , Thats a trick my Aunt told me 20 years ago and it worked wonderfully ..

What are you doing to he;p with is massive uptick in self care ??? Maybe getting your hair down be relaxing and give you a much better break

Im here if you need me

[Mountaindewed]

I feel pretty good today. I’ve slept 12 hours 2 nights in a row. Before that my sleep was horrible. Last night I did not use melatonin and I woke up a couple times and got right back to sleep unlike before where I’d be up for a few hours. I have my sensory thing now which is making a major difference in my sleep and my anxiety as well. And then my moods are under control because my anxiety is under control and so I’m doing much better then I have been doing in a long time.

[~Christina]

Spoke with my T Richard yesterday, much needed!

The company he works for is stressing for video sessions which is something I cant do, my internet wont support it even if i wanted to. He said they are going to give it a trial in October Of course in my small town he said almost half of his clients use flip phones and no computer or internet. He thinks that its insane to expect this from people. The are trying to set up computers in the office to do video sessions , but I will not do. That ups the risk for covid. Anyway he feels that the company is be unrealistic expecting people to do this..

We talked about more important things than that above nonsense . that took 1.30 mins

Hes glad that my level of rage is lessening but there is still quite a bit and I do plan to take a bit longer. I had skipped 2 days of Seroquel ( and damn I felt it) so I would be able to drive and I came home made dinner , took Seroquel and went to bed 20 mins later

Seroquel Stupor already in high gear.. Steve said between his shrinking brain and my stupor from Seroquel we make a hell of a pair

Hugs ad sugar free cookie to all

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Oh goodness getting Quotes Home improvements actually make me physically shudder. There isnt much here that would need done if we ever wanted or had to moves , thankfully ..

My Advise on carpet , get something nice, Not so pricey just add a double backing , It will feeling and look rich when someone comes looking , Thats a trick my Aunt told me 20 years ago and it worked wonderfully ..

What are you doing to he;p with is massive uptick in self care ??? Maybe getting your hair down be relaxing and give you a much better break

Im here if you need me

Thanks, Christina

I'm sure as the cleaning enthusiast that you are that you can maintain your carpets' quality for a long time. Thanks for the tip about the double backing. I will inquire about that. As for the huge quote we received, we've decided to get a second and third one from Home Depot and Lowes, respectively. I truly think they will be much less expensive for something similar. We just want it to look good for the sale. It's not for us, so we're not out to get the very very best.

Self-care. Well, lately I've taken a break from some of the cooking I usually do, and yet I'm still trying to select reasonable options. Being as organized as possible helps me feel more in control. Occasionally I pass a task off to Hubby, or just sit with him as he works and consult with him. We've helped each other. The good thing is that many things will be in the works while we're gone, that we don't need to attend to. While abroad, we can concentrate on THAT part of the project only. Hubby keeps trying to add a realtor visit in France, but I keep saying no. I told him that if he insists, he can go and I can sit on the beach in southern France.

We both got one set of covid test results already, after only one day. They said two to seven days. It's good the turnaround is much improved, but it was so fast that it is more than 72 hours before the flight. [There's a 72 hour restriction.] We had to get the nasal swab "viral" test, not the rapid antibody test that takes only an hour for results. We took a second set of tests later in the day yesterday. We're pretty sure that will be within the 72 hours. We'll take both sets of results with us.

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Spoke with my T Richard yesterday, much needed!

The company he works for is stressing for video sessions which is something I cant do, my internet wont support it even if i wanted to. He said they are going to give it a trial in October Of course in my small town he said almost half of his clients use flip phones and no computer or internet. He thinks that its insane to expect this from people. The are trying to set up computers in the office to do video sessions , but I will not do. That ups the risk for covid. Anyway he feels that the company is be unrealistic expecting people to do this..

We talked about more important things than that above nonsense . that took 1.30 mins

Hes glad that my level of rage is lessening but there is still quite a bit and I do plan to take a bit longer. I had skipped 2 days of Seroquel ( and damn I felt it) so I would be able to drive and I came home made dinner , took Seroquel and went to bed 20 mins later

Seroquel Stupor already in high gear.. Steve said between his shrinking brain and my stupor from Seroquel we make a hell of a pair

Hugs ad sugar free cookie to all

That sucks that technology varies so much in the country. That people in some areas don't have the same as those in others. Infrastructure work certainly needs to be done!

I am a big fan of my Seroquel XR but I understand having to adjust to the sedating aspects. It does ease over time, but requires a boat load of patience and strategy.

[Moose72]

I just drank bleach water! I used water in a bucket with a splash of bleach to clean off the groceries I got, including a can of iced peach green tea. I tried the tea and it "tasted like" bleach! Ok so it has smelled like bleach - I don't know what bleach tastes like, mind you but smell is a large part of taste. I guess what Im saying is did I just poison myself?

Went to the grocery store today and forgot to get milk. Darn!

Im tired but I slept way in till 2. Of course I didn't go to sleep until 2:30 or so. I missed my mom's phone calls. So she didn't come over. Only thing I've done is box up the vast majority of my DVDs.

So in addition to feeling flustered from all I have to do now I made it worse because I chose to sleep! Dispite this, I feel tired.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Lots of scary money quotes coming to my husband and me for house improvements. Today our realtor came with a flooring representative to help us decide on options. The flooring rep just sent me the full quote. I suppose that since it is for much of our main house, except bathrooms, kitchen and foyer, it would be big $$$, but it is still painful to look at. My husband is out at the moment. He wishes that our current stairway and upstairs carpeting would remain, but there are some serious problem areas in it. For example, my husband had the brilliant idea of putting a tree in our spare room. [I hated that idea from the beginning.] Well, under it is a deep round indentation and an impossible to remove stain. And no, you can't expect a prospective buyer not to notice.

When the realtor and flooring guy came I was so nervous that I started to sweat (anxiety-induced hyperhidrosis). I had to step away for a bit and just let Hubby talk. I keep pushing myself, all the same. The other day, I went to the hair salon for a much needed a haircut. I started sweating at one point there, as well. Usually they offer ice water, but they haven't since the coronavirus. I was thinking of getting my hair colored in Czech Republic (probably less than half the price), but I'm reconsidering because of possible sweating. It's just terrible! I can clench my fists to get through tough stuff, but something often gives. In this case, the sweat flows. As it flows, the anxiety builds.

Soupe, love and hugs~

Gotta take some breaks. Gotta lean on hubby. Careful, please.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Thanks, Christina

I'm sure as the cleaning enthusiast that you are that you can maintain your carpets' quality for a long time. Thanks for the tip about the double backing. I will inquire about that. As for the huge quote we received, we've decided to get a second and third one from Home Depot and Lowes, respectively. I truly think they will be much less expensive for something similar. We just want it to look good for the sale. It's not for us, so we're not out to get the very very best.

Self-care. Well, lately I've taken a break from some of the cooking I usually do, and yet I'm still trying to select reasonable options. Being as organized as possible helps me feel more in control. Occasionally I pass a task off to Hubby, or just sit with him as he works and consult with him. We've helped each other. The good thing is that many things will be in the works while we're gone, that we don't need to attend to. While abroad, we can concentrate on THAT part of the project only. Hubby keeps trying to add a realtor visit in France, but I keep saying no. I told him that if he insists, he can go and I can sit on the beach in southern France.

We both got one set of covid test results already, after only one day. They said two to seven days. It's good the turnaround is much improved, but it was so fast that it is more than 72 hours before the flight. [There's a 72 hour restriction.] We had to get the nasal swab "viral" test, not the rapid antibody test that takes only an hour for results. We took a second set of tests later in the day yesterday. We're pretty sure that will be within the 72 hours. We'll take both sets of results with us.

I’m glad your not being buried under everything must be done Right Now !!!!!

How long will you be gone on your trip ? I hope you have lots of time to just relax..

Honestly this is the first time I’ve taken straight Seroquel, it’s always been the XR

I’m not sure how long the sedation effect will last..for now I’m fine to be this way.

Now if my back pain goes away I’ll literally jump for joy. No idea what I did , it’s just stupid.

So my T and Pdoc .. Maybe if the company forces the issue about things must be video I’ll have to finish my 9 years with my T which is going to be very hard. , Pdoc? Same , I have zero internet that can support video. Apparently they are using zoom , I can’t even go to town and use cell data we have low amounts of data and I’m not going to up our limits as we stretch pennies.

It’s just stupid.. I remember dreams I’ve had over the years that one day everything will be via computer. There is no free WiFi anywhere here . I feel bad for the kids , lots of parents want to home school

No company will come out here to get people full useable internet. Us poor people don’t matter lol

Ahhh well what’s going to happen will happen.

I’m pretty excited about your trip! Maybe you can take a few pics and post here??

Hugs

[Victoria'smom]

ED stuff

Possible trigger:

So t wants me to see a nutritionist. She's happy I'm dumping soda. But she doesn't seem to understand that's not a move to healthiness. She moved my appointments to every other week. I think I'm not making it clear. Maybe in 2 weeks I'll have something to talk about. Mood wise I'm fine but I'm regressing with coping skills. I don't understand.

happy stressors. She said I need to get everything under control soon given Miguel may move out and she thinks I'll struggle big time with that.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Thanks, Christina

I'm sure as the cleaning enthusiast that you are that you can maintain your carpets' quality for a long time. Thanks for the tip about the double backing. I will inquire about that. As for the huge quote we received, we've decided to get a second and third one from Home Depot and Lowes, respectively. I truly think they will be much less expensive for something similar. We just want it to look good for the sale. It's not for us, so we're not out to get the very very best.

Self-care. Well, lately I've taken a break from some of the cooking I usually do, and yet I'm still trying to select reasonable options. Being as organized as possible helps me feel more in control. Occasionally I pass a task off to Hubby, or just sit with him as he works and consult with him. We've helped each other. The good thing is that many things will be in the works while we're gone, that we don't need to attend to. While abroad, we can concentrate on THAT part of the project only. Hubby keeps trying to add a realtor visit in France, but I keep saying no. I told him that if he insists, he can go and I can sit on the beach in southern France.

We both got one set of covid test results already, after only one day. They said two to seven days. It's good the turnaround is much improved, but it was so fast that it is more than 72 hours before the flight. [There's a 72 hour restriction.] We had to get the nasal swab "viral" test, not the rapid antibody test that takes only an hour for results. We took a second set of tests later in the day yesterday. We're pretty sure that will be within the 72 hours. We'll take both sets of results with us.

So proud of you, Soupe. It is realyy coming together.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I just drank bleach water! I used water in a bucket with a splash of bleach to clean off the groceries I got, including a can of iced peach green tea. I tried the tea and it "tasted like" bleach! Ok so it has smelled like bleach - I don't know what bleach tastes like, mind you but smell is a large part of taste. I guess what Im saying is did I just poison myself?

Went to the grocery store today and forgot to get milk. Darn!

Im tired but I slept way in till 2. Of course I didn't go to sleep until 2:30 or so. I missed my mom's phone calls. So she didn't come over. Only thing I've done is box up the vast majority of my DVDs.

So in addition to feeling flustered from all I have to do now I made it worse because I chose to sleep! Dispite this, I feel tired.

Yukko!! R u okay?

Hugs!

[bpcyclist]

My illness seems largely glutamate-rooted, so, starting sarcosine today 6 gm a day at first. Good trials have shown 20-40 percent improvement in negative symptoms, what we term the down pole. Really wish schizophrenia and bipolar used the same taxonomy. Would make more sense. 20-40 percent would be giant for me.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Yukko!! R u okay?

Hugs!

Seem to be.

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

How long will you be gone on your trip ? I hope you have lots of time to just relax..

Honestly this is the first time I’ve taken straight Seroquel, it’s always been the XR

I’m not sure how long the sedation effect will last..for now I’m fine to be this way.

Now if my back pain goes away I’ll literally jump for joy. No idea what I did , it’s just stupid.

I’m pretty excited about your trip! Maybe you can take a few pics and post here??

Hugs

Our trip will last a few weeks. Back at the end of September. We'll have people looking after our house/plants/etc. It's such a long time that it's hard to simply set it up to take care of itself.

I occasionally take the regular Seroquel as a PRN and had taken it at higher doses at one point several years back. I always say "the spike is higher and quicker" than the XR. That's my description, in layman's terms. I will say that having been on XR for so long, if I'm a little hypomanic/manic, the regular as a PRN doesn't tire me out during the day, just gives a little calming of the fire. Sometimes I add some regular to my XR if I have insomnia. That does seem to sedate me to a higher degree than during the day. I'm sure you'll get used to it. What's important is for you to get control and peace back for your moods.

If your husband is doing a lot better, could you convince him to give you a nice back rub to help your back? I'd think he shouldn't mind considering all of the TLC you gave him in recent months. Arnica or Voltaren works well for my husband. I get sick of giving him massages sometimes, but it really does help him. He gets about 15 massages for every one I ever get from him. I shouldn't complain because I don't have back pain. That should be reward enough for me.

I will take some photos. Maybe I'll have a chance to post a couple in our absence. We'll see. I might just take some in combination with journaling. My husband will have his laptop, but I won't. Just my smart phone. If I post with my phone, you'll have to forgive typos here and there.

[*Beth*]

I've been furnishing my apartment, meaning 2 nice little book cases, a new cat tree, 2 cafe chairs. I've had to assemble everything and I've gotten into a kind of spin. Started out irritable and on edge, the heat and smoke complicates life. Today is the first day in weeks - the air is more clear. A bit hazy still, but not terrible. The heat is too much, though. I really would like to open all of my windows and get breezes through my apartment. Maybe by October....

Anyway, my pdoc raised my AP dose a bit; she and my T said I'm in a mixed state, leaning toward a mania. I'm fine with a higher AP dose. Getting my hair cut yesterday felt so, so good. I have thick hair and not being able to cut it for months (covid) was starting to drag me down. Hair is a part of the body, after all.

So I'm going to build the last piece of furniture. I'm good at it by now!

The thing is that I saw something on this forum (not this board) that has really upset me and I hate when that happens. Some posts that don't should have trigger warnings

Anyway, I'm looking forward to dark and seeing the moon tonight. But first have to build book shelf.

Hugs all around

weary bored lonely irritable frustrated

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Our trip will last a few weeks. Back at the end of September. We'll have people looking after our house/plants/etc. It's such a long time that it's hard to simply set it up to take care of itself.

I occasionally take the regular Seroquel as a PRN and had taken it at higher doses at one point several years back. I always say "the spike is higher and quicker" than the XR. That's my description, in layman's terms. I will say that having been on XR for so long, if I'm a little hypomanic/manic, the regular as a PRN doesn't tire me out during the day, just gives a little calming of the fire. Sometimes I add some regular to my XR if I have insomnia. That does seem to sedate me to a higher degree than during the day. I'm sure you'll get used to it. What's important is for you to get control and peace back for your moods.

If your husband is doing a lot better, could you convince him to give you a nice back rub to help your back? I'd think he shouldn't mind considering all of the TLC you gave him in recent months. Arnica or Voltaren works well for my husband. I get sick of giving him massages sometimes, but it really does help him. He gets about 15 massages for every one I ever get from him. I shouldn't complain because I don't have back pain. That should be reward enough for me.

I will take some photos. Maybe I'll have a chance to post a couple in our absence. We'll see. I might just take some in combination with journaling. My husband will have his laptop, but I won't. Just my smart phone. If I post with my phone, you'll have to forgive typos here and there.

I expected the Seroquel to quit the sedation bit after the first week to be honest, since I have insomnia so bad , all my life..

I have been using my tens unit on my back 2 long cycles a night, And it does help for 5-10 mins and even with Steve rubbing it he says its just turning to cement so fast...

I look forward to some awesome pics while your gone or when you back home

[Victoria'smom]

ED trigger

Possible trigger:

I'm switching soda to sipping meal replacement shakes

We can all agree that's healthier for me. I don't think I know how to deal with everything not being on fire.

[Daonnachd]

Hey, all.

Coming down from a short hypomanic episode I'm not quite sure how I feel. I'm ok, I guess.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

Hey, all.

Coming down from a short hypomanic episode I'm not quite sure how I feel. I'm ok, I guess.

Welcome Back! I've been thinking of you. Sorry you've had a hypo episode. Hoping for level soon.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

Hey, all.

Coming down from a short hypomanic episode I'm not quite sure how I feel. I'm ok, I guess.

Hi! How've you been doing with the smoke? We've had a rough go around here!!

Hi @Daonnachd! I was just thinking of you today and wanted to put out a thread asking for you but couldn't remember your name. It's a toughie. And here you are! Did you have fun during your hypomania?

[Coolbreeze74]

I was suicidal yesterday and would have acted on it, completely would have but my son heard me talking about it and wouldn't leave my side.

I finally got some sleep tho and feel better and I wont say I'm happy to be alive, but my problems don't feel as unmanageable. I talked to my pharmacist and told her I didn't appreciate her scarring me about my meds. My dr said the chances of a qt prolongation is extremely rare. But I'm still going to wear the heart monitor. But my pharmacist is really against benzodiazepines and gabapentin. Almost all meds that can help with anxiety. My dr said it wasnt cool of her to scare me so bad. I'm quite sure the panic attacks are from benzo withdrawal.