[junkDNA]

hi. so.
sometimes i like to make myself stay up all night.
like.
sometimes i drink 5 hour energies, make coffee, lots of mtn dew.

take extra adderall. whatever works.

but then around, like, 5pm the next day i feel so ******. nothing is real.
everything seems fake. colors and sounds are all made-up.

i think i might like the euphoria that comes with sleep deprivation.

but, i also hate it.



anyone know what i'm talking about???

[catrules]

As someone who struggles with insomnia on a regular basis, I cannot say that I understand the wanting to stay up. I'll be up at 4 in the morning and would do anything to get to sleep. But when I am hypomanic, I stay up, and even the next day I do not feel too bad. There is no crash and sometimes it happens two nights in a row. And by that second night I feel desperate.

[Hellion]

Other then my general inability to fall asleep at a rational time or falling asleep but waking up repeatedly and having weirdly unpleasant dreams. I've done things like that at times...not really sure why, I mean I have even taken psychology so I know all the bad things sleep deprivation can do. But sometimes for no real reason I have an urge to try and go without sleep for a day or longer.

[medkev13]

The crappy feeling is partly due to the chemical fix that drove you through your insomnia. The unreal feeling, like everything is fake, is a symptom of prolonged sleep deprivation. After so much time without adequate sleep the mind starts to mimic mild psychosis (hallucinations, delusions - ie, the fake feeling, emotional instability). It's generally not healthy to force yourself to be insomniatic.

[junkDNA]

i am an insomniatic naturaly, if i don't take my meds.

[krisakira]

Choosing to stay awake is called sleep deprivation, not insomnia. It can be a form of self-punishment, or just doing what you want without thinking of the consequences. I've done both.

[junkDNA]

yes, thats what i experience now....

i take a lot of meds to sleep. i suffered from severe incurable insomnia for 4 weeks, about, 3 weeks ago. i was on Haldol even... it didn't work.

now i just stay up until im exhausted and feel i actually NEED to sleep.

Euphoria, Insomnia, yup. I should be sleeping now! But I have Bipolar to partially blame for this problem.

Do it on purpose? No, but I have had terrible insomnia for most of my life. I wish I could just go to sleep. And yes it's called sleep deprivation not insomnia if it is intentional. Anyone wanna trade me some sleep for some euphoria?? ok kidding.

Sleep deprivation is very unhealthy, There is a reason why around 5 pm you start to feel really crappy.It has a very negative effect on every single part of your body.

JunkDNA, I hope you got some sleep!

[-jimi-]

It can be so many things. Take a good look and try to figure it out. You are not me, but if that would have been me, it would probably be one of a number of things.

Sometimes I try to do the right thing for so long (like going to sleep), and when it doesn't work despite my efforts, I get mad and do the opposite, somehow hoping it will help. Oddly enough, doing the opposite actually have helped me with some other things... Yea, I'm weird.

Sometimes I just want to leave my current mood, it feels blah. I don't really at that point care what the next mood is, just it needs to be different. Then sometimes I cause myself problems, like using medication or caffeine.

At times, I wish things would just come naturally to me. I wish everything wasn't such a struggle. You know, just lying down and sleep comes. Something most people take for granted. I actually really miss that thing, that normal sleepy thing. I don't force myself to stay awake, but I could see how sleep deprivation could be used to somehow try to beat insomnia, like thinking at some point I WILL fall asleep in that nice, natural sense.

Also nights are the time when I live. Days feel unnatural to me. Maybe I'm a vampire or something. But I don't want to sacrifice the time when I feel OK, just so I can function the next day and never really be happy anyway...

Also, if you tend to overdream, that will spiral you into a bad feeling. That is one of the reasons why sleep deprivation can temporarily relieve depression, you cut down on the overdoing the REM sleep. Many people with almost all kinds of mental illnesses don't for some reason get enough theta/delta sleep.