[merewyn]

I was in an abusive relationship 12 years ago. It lasted three years until one night I ended up in the hospital and the authorities got involved. I haven't seen my ex boyfriend since then.

I dream about him. He is in my dreams often and not as the bad guy. For some reason I'm always trying to get back with him. As if we love each other but can't be together.
I can't stop dreaming about him. Since then I've been married, divorced, had two children and am now in another relationship. I love my current boyfriend (of the last 4 years, and the father to my kids) very much. We have a wonderful relationship and I couldn't ask for a better person to be my mate in life. So why do I still dream of my ex that beat me? He tried multiple times to murder me. He smothered me with a pillow, he strangled me, he threatened to kill me with a shotgun in my face... Why does he haunt me?

[Thunder Bow]

You are seeking familiar patterns. Were you a victim of abuse as a child??

[merewyn]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

You are seeking familiar patterns. Were you a victim of abuse as a child??

I am not. My childhood was actually very good. This relationship is the only abuse I've experienced in my life. It's very confusing for me.

[Thunder Bow]

Originally Posted by merewyn

I am not. My childhood was actually very good. This relationship is the only abuse I've experienced in my life. It's very confusing for me.

Trauma like that Can and will Haunt you. Seek Professional assistance, you might be suffering from PTSD.

[a bland]

i have PTSD and i dream about my trauma every night. sounds like u could have the same thing.

[merewyn]

Thank you for your input. I never thought it could be PTSD. I've had some troubles talking with Ts in the past, but I don't know any other way to get better, so I guess I need to suck it up and start talking to someone again.