[Quebec01]

I dreamed that I was riding a headless black horse. It was tall, like a Thoroughbred, apparently old and still strong. Even if he was close to 30 years old, his owner kept him because he was still very good. My former horse, which I "sold" (hate the word for a living being) last year, was following us. We were galloping up a steep cliff and the last stretch was a challenge. The headless horse made it, climbing almost on its knees. I was worried my horse would not make it but it seems he made it too but I did not really look. While riding the headless horse, I kept asking myself, how could he keep the bridle on if he had no head? I was holding the reins so there must have been something holding the bridle and the bit. Also, I knew he had to have his brains if he was responding, so he had to have part of his head even though I could not see it. In the pas two weeks, I dreamed at least four times of my former horse who I raised from a colt and was part of my life for the past 16 years.

[sugahorse1]

Selling a horse is a very traumatic experience, and it sounds like you are taking strain, possibly feeling guilty about your actions. I assume this is what is now manifesting itself in your dreams

[Quebec01]

You are so right about this. I never said goodbye to him because I was supposed to visit him as often as I wanted to and to continue to exchange with the new owner. Only once did I receive some news, but indirectly through my riding mentor, that everything was going well and that was about two months after. All my emails remained unanswered. My dearest wish was to keep my horse but illness and financial issues made it more logical to hand him over to someone else. I'm trying to let go but the whole process is tearing my heart apart. I pray a lot and surround him with love and light...

[sugahorse1]

I can relate. And one always has the good intentions of keeping informed and in touch, but invariably it falls by the way side. It's hard to let a best friend go.
You need to know that what you did was the best decision for everyone involved

[Thunder Bow]

"Headless" Horse may be all Heart. The Horse represents your Heart in this dream. You follow your Heart, thus the Horse knows where you want it to go. This dream is all about knowing what is in your Heart!

[Quebec01]

Dear Thunder Bow.
Thank you for shedding some light on this dream.
Dreams are often mysterious and enigmatic.
Seen from this perspective has just opened a window...

[Quebec01]

Dear SugaHorse,
The circumstances that led to taking this difficult decision were caused by my status of disability associated to fibromyalgia and bipolar disorder. The health issues made it more and more difficult to go to the stable. You know what caring for a horse involves and I was not able to provide him with all this attention anymore. My body was not following anymore. So for a while, my riding mentor who uses ethology in her teaching would give a few courses with him. That kept him sharp and he was turned out everyday with a companion. Also, a girl was half boarding him. She was gentle with him. He loved the attention. To keep a horse young and strong, I noticed that regular activity is always the best. Before, I was attending to him at least five times a week, assuring him of all the attention, activity and all sorts of variety to exercice and keep him motivated. I never wanted him to get bored over doing the same thing over and over again. I always made sure he kept a smile on his face, whatever we were doing, even when doing more technical manœuvres in the ring. He was so polyvalent and responsive to any aid and had very nice manners. We were connected to a point where we were telepathic, especially on trail.
In the process of taking this decision, owning a car did not fit in my budget anymore. I knew that this time would come since I could not afford the maintenance or even the insurance anymore. I had to let go of my car a few months later. So yes, it was the right decision. Through this process, I was also thinking of my horse, if he ever needed any veterinary care, which I would not be able to afford. Even though he had a very strong constitution, this would just be irresponsible. But now, I'm in mourning. In the process, I need to trust that God will watch over him. Empowering this thought is a mental exercise I practice everytime he crosses my mind.