[MusicMike]

I had a dream last night which was very special to me, despite having painful content, because it showed me that I have a heart.

Some background: I have a friend, Heather, whom I've known since we were both college students 23 years ago. She is very ill and disabled, and it's sad. I care about her a whole lot, though.. in fact we were boyfriend/girlfriend before she got sick with bipolar and other things. We never stopped caring about each other, but as she got sicker and sicker we couldn't be in a relationship any more. She suffers from the effects of childhood trauma and has a lot of inwardly turned anger. At this point in my life, I often feel despair when I think about her... but more and more I can feel sadness rather than despair. I feel compassion rather than hardening my heart. She gives me a chance to open my heart.

So in the dream she is so sick that she is near death. She is in the hospital, and they do some kind of scan that shows damage in her body. I think about how the physical damage seems to mirror her inwardly turned anger... there is something about the structure of the damage that matches what I know about her personality. She is almost unconscious and probably won't live much longer.

That's all I remember. I woke up crying. But it was a good crying, because my heart felt open and tender. I felt compassion, and not only for her, but for myself too.

[JadeAmethyst]

When I read your post, I can sense this tenderness and care.
What a gift.

warm regards to you and your very special and sweet friend.
Jade

[Thunder Bow]

This mirrors how you feel inside yourself. You are opening your Heart to Yourself.!