[Lriavanae]

Introduction

To be honest, I have no experience in Lucid Dreaming nor have I tried to, but I just came here to have my dream interpreted. I posted as quickly as I could, knowing that sometimes even the most vivid of dreams can fade from my memory, especially if it has a number of seemingly incongruous events that I need to keep grasping at in order not to forget.

Settings

There are a few odd themes inside the dream, as well as some unusual "settings", very much like how a flash game has "settings" for volume, quality, etc. In this dream, the settings are:

1) Ability to not only speak in my 3rd language but more fluently so than in real life, perhaps because "thinking" of what you would say is an easier process than actually saying it. More so if it was something like your 3rd language.

2) Having my social awareness and even personal superstitions intact and being aware of them. Oddly enough I am more relaxed with my superstitions, as I broke some of them but minded way less in my dream. Social awareness was very high when interacting with people in my dreamscape, to the point where I execute my actions in accordance to them coldly and strategically to ensure best leverage. I demonstrated an understanding of social graces and etiquette in the dream, which I know does not occur in all dreams.

3) I can read analogue clock faces, but not labels. I think I can read billboards and bigger signs in general, or else I won't be able to identify the 7 - 11 in my 2nd act.

4) The dream is permanently in night time. Or at least, the dream has occurred under a dark sky (well, sometimes I'm indoors). Not the gloomy one. Just the stark black of the night.

5) I dreamt this in colour as usual. This was a soundless dream. I would probably use imagination to fill in the voices for everyone that verbally interacted with me based on my memory of them in real life or through a stereotype. For example a fatherly figure would have a deep, rumbling and yet accomodating tone.

Act 1: The School - Me interacting with the Many

Preamble

Originally, I had only intended to write about the 2nd act, as it was the only part of dream I had memory of upon waking. As I fired up the computer, I remembered the part that connected Act 1 to Act 2. As I was completing the signing in process here, I remembered the actual part before Act 2, known as Act 1. From this point on, I do not recall any more parts before then. So this will be the first act.

My decision to split this into 2 acts because you know how dreams are. You can have an entirely coherent dream without breaks in between, but you feel as though the dream is split into 2 or more clearly defined segments, due to their themes and/or simply by their physical, geographical setting.

Act 1a) - The Scholarship

The setting for Act 1 is located in a university campus. I'm currently in the middle of college in REAL LIFE.

I was in middle of college in this dream as well. The earliest part that I remembered about the dream was that it was a big day for me: I won a scholarship for making college history by getting an unprecedentedly high finish as a finalist at a prestigious international performing arts competition at inter-college levels. This has happened in real life, but before I entered college and at National level only. This dream has decided to enhance the excellence of this feat upwards, perhaps there was a hint of ambition in this regard.

As it is in real life, I had a one other schoolmate who has achieved the same feat in the same year, from the same club, and it was also a female. The similarities end there.

In the dream, we received a scholarship that paid off our college fees in its entirety. In real life, my fees were already fully paid for thanks to parents (bless them), and my dream's fees were much too costly. I shall not reveal the cost, but I can say I remember the numbers clearly. I'm not sure if the ability to read financial documents is a common trait in dreams. I could do it here however.

In the dream, a total of 4 of us in college this year have achieved this scholarship. My schoolmate and I in the same discipline, a school idol whom I remembered from high school days who won it through what he does best: singing, and the 4th person was an unknown quantity that I seemed to take zero interest in.

An interesting fact is that I did not know Mr School Idol won this scholarship from the get-go, only later in the dream did I encounter him brandishing the cheque in the school grounds did I take this into account.

Only my schoolmate and I were called into the college's office of financial matters, which resembled my middle school's main office at the exterior, to be presented the award by a higher up in the school's staff. The sight of the outside of this office has commanded more fear than any other school offices in my schooling days, as discipline was much more strongly enforced then than in any of my other schools. However, in my dream it would be the place where I would be awarded something that would be a tremendous relief financially, as well as a form of recognition that might elevate my status in campus. As you have noticed, this awards ceremony was a closed-doors affair, very unusual.

The one who awarded us, an unmemorable male, gave us a financial receipt of college fees paid for and the ceremonious big cheque which was nowhere to be seen when we got outside the office. Too cumbersome to be carrying around in the dream, I suppose. While the office's exterior was a familiar sight from the past, the interior was labyrinthine and not unlike interpretations of secret government bases you get to see in spy flicks.

I can only assume the other 2 got their awards seperately from us for being in different fields. I do not know how I know there are 4 of us, I just know.

Act 1b) - School and its denizens

By now you should realize my dream has incorporated elements from not only my college life, but from my days in previous institutions as well. This trend will continue.

Remember how I mentioned that my fellow awardee was not very similar to her counterpart in real life? This was very much so. In real life, we were rivals and pretty distant to one another, each from a different clique in the performing arts club. This one was particularly clingy, and from the moment we were outside the office did she begin to hold on to my hand like she wanted to be my bestie. I had an uncomfortable feeling about that, and was unsure as to why it was so at that moment.

The rest of the campus grounds seemed to resemble my high school, and it was so as both of us made our way to the school's cafeteria... hand-in-hand no less. I waved and said hi to numerous people which I cannot remember exactly now, but I know that there was a good mix of people from elementary school days, middle school days and high school days. Oddly enough no college mates. The persistence of my waving probably conveyed my high status in campus: just about everyone I crossed knew me enough to at least give me a "hi". The feeling of unease with my bestie holding my hand steadily upped.

The cafeteria resembled the one in my elementary school, but it was comprised of many different food options like in college, and not a forced menu affair. There was a blur in my memory from this point to when I exited the cafeteria in an obvious hurry, but a few facts were established from whatever negative event took place there: 1) my "bestie" was an unexplained outcast in the community and her achievement did not change that, 2) my value and popularity has been dropping with every second spent in physically close proximity with her, thus my previous discomfort and 3) my discomfort with her has elevated to a need to get away from her.

This is a recurring theme in real life. I was not an outcast by any means in any community I would be part of, be it school, work, or similar. In fact, there were instances of me being a community leader and someone noted for excellence, especially in fields where I take a vested interest in. However, I would still consider myself ordinary, so such instances were not exactly frequent. However, I have tasted fervent popularity enough to experience what will make it or break it for me. So makes it and what breaks it? I can clearly identify what has consistently broken my popularity streaks in the past.

My Achilles' Heel here was my tendency to associate with people who have been "outcasted" or are in general, shunned by the rest. Some of my worst social experiences in life was when I took a stand for and/or befriended the unpopular. I knew this has profoundly hurt my status in the past, and as I grew older and had more of such negative experiences, I became far more adverse to standing up for them, preferring to be "neutral". However, I would never join the jeering masses and shun whoever it was in question, even if it meant better standing with the majority.

However, this was precisely what I did in the dream. I knew that my social status, freshly elevated, would crash around my ears if I associated with "bestie", so I decided to make a fast break for it and out of the cafeteria I went, knowing full well my sudden desertion would hurt her badly. I had awareness of my social value in my community, identified the threat to it, and coldly terminated it. Very Machiavellian, and something I would not do in real life. In this dreamscape however, it was a cold and precise maneuver. I cannot emphasize this enough.

She gave chase naturally, me being the only friend I had here. Running past scores of even more familiar faces from my school life, including Mr School Idol who recognized me and excitedly brandished his massive cheque with his trademark boyish enthusiasm, I realized my reception was generally more subdued, and even negative at instances. No "hi"s anymore. I needed to repair my status, and quick.

It is time to move. School day wound down to a close, it has ended.

Act 2: The Transport - Me interacting with Another

Transition between the Parts

School day wound down to a close, it has ended. Now there would be a significant thematic and setting shift. However, some tendrils of the first Act need to be tied up and addressed. The theme of "popularity" and the setting of "school" remain, but the transition is here.

Like in elementary school, I was boarding the bus. However this bus was not the skanky affair of a elementary school bus. It was a modern make, of air-conditioning and strobe lights (?!) in the dark. Basically the setting of a club. In the dream, this bizarre concept existed: a school bus that sends college students home when the day wound down (whenever that is, because that's a very elementary to high school thing... college never truly ends with a fixed time of the day), with the interior of a nightclub to keep its occupants happy. I was a ruler of this domain, taking a completely different persona and being totally indistinguishable from my in-campus self. I took the appearance of perpetually shades-wearing alpha male with a mohawk.

In this setting, I had a strategy to build popularity. I would rush to the bus, earliest bird by far. I would build rapport with the driver, a stocky amiable elderly man with grayish hair, enabling me to establish the most strategic spot in the club-bus. I would enthusiastically welcome any of the big players in the club-bus the moment they set foot in it, have them bask in the prime area I picked out for them and continuously do so until I have an entire posse of popular people around me, then as the club heats up and the wheels of the bus turn and go to our homes, wherever they may be, we would be the hottest items around.

This was the strategy I visualized as I did the routine thing of small talking the driver, the "manager" so to speak, as he let me pick out the best cluster of seats as usual. Note that the "best" seats were not physically distinguishable in the dream. It is just that me and everyone else who enters just instinctively knows the relative value of a seat.

On this instance though, no one boarded the bus, and the bus started.

It made a few circuits around its route, crossing the vicinity of my home a few times. I was long overdue to get off a couple loops ago. However, I had a confusing and weary day, so I decided to lay in what I would call my "territory" for solace.

The next part begins, proper.

Act 2a) - Transformers

After the bus looped a few times and landed outside the campus once more, with no one boarding, I caught a glimpse of the driver's face in the overhead rear-view mirror. His reflection looked directly at me and asked if I was ever getting off where I was supposed to. I merely told him I wanted to rest in here for as long as I could, I wanted reside in the bastion where I was comfortable and popular.

Comfort here was not just emotional, but physical. I had chosen the best seats after all, and I would stay for as long as the club-bus was going throughout this night still young.

As if understanding, the driver nodded and continued. He added that since there was no one coming along, so he would accommodate our needs better.

The club-bus interiors morphed into that of a taxi, but it was no longer a club inside but a taxi. Albeit one with the plushiest leather seats and a night setting. I am reminiscing fondly as I write this, trust me. This was as comfortable as I'd have ever been in the dream, I could have easily been in a limousine and would not be able to tell the difference in comfort levels. I am reminiscing fondly as I write this, trust me.

The bus driver morphed too. Now the taxi driver has taken a different appearance. He resembled (the actor of) an Asian Emperor that I once saw in feudal era Japanese flick, known for his mercurial temper: the ability to switch between malevolence and benevolence with ease. In the flick his benevolent side was more dominant. In this dream, his benevolent side was the only present. A rich and fatherly voice was imagined.

He began to strike up a conversation. Not the kind of PR-ish things you would go for when you chat with say, the manager of a club when you want to build rapport. This was different. These were mundane but warm topics. How did your day go? Are you getting along fine with life? I also realized my persona has changed, now I am just a featureless, nondescript passenger in the taxi, laid bare and only armed with my personality, experiences, emotions and knowledge.

The core of being, basically.

It was upon his insistence that I had to speak his mother tongue now that he's Asian, and it was a language which happened to be a 3rd language I picked up. I spoke haltingly throughout, but slightly better than I would in real life, at least getting my accent off from my vocalization which would be physically impossible in real life as of now. As I have mentioned, this might be the effect of the conversation going on in my mind rather than physically. I can imagine good enunciation, and execute it in an awkward but decent manner in this one dream.

I cannot remember what we chatted about in entirety. I do know we got to increasingly personal topics like family life and the like. I do remember I demonstrated strong social awareness, able to anticipate exactly which topics would go dry/awkward and steer the conversation to better waters. All these despite my lack of proficiency in said language.

The landscape has changed. In the club-bus I would hardly bother to look out of the window: I would be informed by the trusty driver somehow that it would be good to alight. I assumed we would pass many homes as we would see off no small number of college students. Here in the taxi, I looked out and saw only 2 scapes.

1) A stereotypical big city at night. Billboards and neon signs on skyscrapers ruled the skyline. I could even get an odd third person view of the entire urban scenery with our taxi within, in the mind's eye.

2) The road just outside my home. Passing it brought comfort and a longing to get back, as the sight of it always does.

However, the taxi driver and the ride was a better deal to me now.

Act 2b) - Chronology

I now realized I have access to an analog watch, perhaps to compensate for my inability to read digital faces in dreams. It has a white face with silver straps, plain as you like. I am amazed that I could vividly remember its appearance in the dream. The hands were neon, good for reading in the mostly dark inside of a night taxi. I first read the time as the conversation in the taxi came to its inexorable slow down. It was close to 8. The night was still very very young, at least to me.

The driver then asked me if I would end the ride. I said that if he did not mind, we could keep this rolling. In the real world, I would have chalked up an astronomical fare. In the dreamscape, something told me that both of us enjoyed this ride and every other concern was trivial. The taxi man's paternal and rich presence was definitely good companionship, like time spent with a favourite uncle.

He complied, and the landscape outside my taxi changed. We were in lonely roads, with the occasional isolated house or drive-in dining outlets dotted all over. Talking makes for thirst. We both wanted a drink, oddly enough it was to be alcoholic.

He parked outside what I clearly identified as a 7 - 11. This outlet was the one very near my home in the past, open at all times and a wonderful companion to study nights. It was torn down eventually, and its absence left me bereaved for a short period of time. Now I see it in the dream, but it was in a secluded area nowhere near my home like it was in reality.

Also the 7 - 11 resembled the last time I visited it before closing: there were signs of packing up all over.

Taxi man waited in the car while I went to buy 2 bottles. I have a personal superstition on alcoholic beverages I get. Certain kinds of vodka would be bought and others avoided. I used to try a good variety, but I thought some labels were inauspicious and others had good vibes (I drink some brands and I would have a bad/boring night with friends, vice-versa). I had this superstition in mind as I bought the 2 luckiest labels I can find.

However, in defiance to what I normally do, I offered the luckiest brand to the driver and the 2nd luckiest to myself. I felt a twinge of annoyance at myself which disappeared quickly.

Blatantly, the taxi driver drunk-drove and while I just drunk. We exchanged lame jokes and alcohol-driven fun conversations. Time flew as his driving remained perfect and the landscape was still secluded wilderness. This process was punctuated by my glances at my watch. Time was consistently marching on.

We soon stopped at a different, better-stocked 7 - 11 that showed no indication of packing. 2 more bottles for us, but we stopped and sat at the curb this time, outside the outlet. No more driving, just sitting and talking. I looked at my watch: 5 minutes to midnight. Interaction continued.

After a short time, which I assume was 5 minutes before a new day arrived, the world around me disintegrated like how a Vitamin C pill fizzles and dissolves in water. Everything around me disappeared into washed whiteness as I gained awareness of reality and woke up.

Now What

Sorry for going on and on about this dream. I am painfully aware that this post is longer than most. However, there was much detail in this dream, and the transition of themes is most unusual. As are the settings involved. I hope this has at least been an entertaining read.

In any case, I hope for some good interpretations despite the challenging premise of dissecting so many aspects of a long dream in my afternoon nap. Here's to looking forward to some solid responses!

[bluekoi]

Lriavanae, Wow! My dreams are never this detailed. I hope some other members with can help with an interpretation.

[Thunder Bow]

Dreams of moving on...you are comfortable with yourself.

Sure, I'm game. I'm probably not entirely correct in interpreting dreams, however.

*Reads it* Phew, that was beautiful! *Tear* Just wonderful. Nicely detailed. Awesome dream. I like ones like these.

About the first points you made:
I'm wondering if social awareness in dreams has to do with the strength of "lucidity" of the dream. Meaning, the greater you are connected to the parts of your brain that deal with social graces, the more you feel the dream is real. However, in a dream, you may feel more comfortable expressing these social tactics because dreams often place you in a more uninhibited landscape and mindset than in real life.

I think awareness of important things like analog clocks and signs also have to do with lucidity of the dream, in a similar fashion as social awareness. However, your mind may just graze over the most unimportant objects.

I personally feel dark dreams represent mystery. Since this didn't take place in a scary setting, I feel like this is the "mood" of the dream, and you are exploring things such as feelings or maybe even the future.

ACT 1
1a)

College is probably a big part of your life. I can see how the dream's similar scholarship may have been an ambition of wishing for the task of competing against such a large group. Maybe your mind feels that it was able to take on such a task, and was letting you know you would win?

Maybe the cost of schooling and the fact that you paid it off with the scholarship shows you felt that the cost of your college wasn't paid simply by your parents, but instead your abilities to prove why you're worth supporting, maybe both to your parents and yourself?

I think the additional winners were supporting your mind's need to be realistic about the scholarship and adding what it thought would also be scholarship winners.

The financial aid office appearing similar to your middle school's office might mean you feel your success still is related to those days in your life, and the feelings of discipline. Maybe it shows that your efforts to succeed make you feel trapped by fear somewhat? I think the "spy flick" similarity of the hall was your mind taking off with this feeling of needing to be covert and follow the discipline sorrounding your success.

1b)

About the girl totally being switched in character, this may be because she was very close to you in accomplishments, which you may feel deeply about. Maybe her being close to your accomplishments made her feel almost close to "you" in a way. Or, she could have taken a role in the dream that just made her different than usual. Such as, maybe the dream was basing itself off of something like a book or movie where that character was different. The former sounds more likely, even if not correct. The fact that you were uncomfortable holding her hand may represent simply how you felt about the situation, or how you felt uncomfortable in real life to be compared to her or have to deal with her often. Or, could it be possible you wanted to be friends in real life? Dreams have a way of making us deal more intimately with others than we would in real life. Maybe this has to do with instincts? Such as, in other countries and also in the past, I've heard of things like friends holding hands was normal.

I think the fact that the school was filled with people of all different school ages might represent that your life and accomplishments still lie in the path you've taken through life. Our past can be more present in our lives than we believe, and I think that's why we see bits of it still in our dreams. I've heard the unconcious mind does a lot of work.

The fact that you didn't want to be involved with her for the reasons of being an "outcast" might be due to many reasons. Maybe your mind sees her as representing those who compete against you, and are bringing you down when others or you compare these people to you? Or, maybe it's because you feel ashamed to become close to those who compete with you? Kind of like in the movie Inception, sometimes the people in the background of our mind represents who we are and what we like, even when we try to hide that part of ourselves, and will attack what we don't like, whether we're aware of it or not. Only, sometimes though. Maybe you've wanted to become close to others who weren't popular, and your mind is showing how you had to turn down their friendship? Perhaps shame for taking on these friendships?

By the way, it was very sweet of you to have stood up for those who were "outcast." I had grown up with a lot of emotional abuse from my family, by siblings, both parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, you name it... Once they outcast me, I became one in school as well... Don't know if the events are related; I was pretty strange anyways. Acting like an outcast can be caused for many reasons people can't understand from the exterior, and living as such can be heck on Earth until you get out of high school. I'm pretty sure studies have shown the feeling of being accepted is a very large influence on health and success. It can mean a lot for somebody to stand up for them, and even if others looked down on you for it. They should have been thankful they didn't have it as bad.

In your dream, the fact that you ran out on her might show your own mind's inner urge to care for itself. Is there something in the future or present you feel you must run away from to keep safe? And not neccessarily having anything to do with someone who is disliked, but possibly in relationships? It sounds like something that can affect your accomplishments, and the life you've built for yourself.

I feel like this act was dealing with your feelings of inner self-worth and the shame that comes with this burdensome task.

Act 2
Transition

It seems like here, your mind is bringing college into the mix. Maybe it's "getting over" those feelings with your accomplishments that were born from your past and is moving on to how you feel about college, which may be much more different? Is the bus representing what you feel college life is like compared to high school and the years before? Maybe college, or at least what feelings your mind may be dealing with, are problems lying outside of school? Meaning, the fact that the bus gives rides after "college time" each day.

As for how you look and act, I personally have many dreams where I am either a different person with a somewhat different personality compared to real life, or exactly myself. I really can't relate to how you became in the dream. Maybe it was an inner part of your personality? How you would be if you let yourself be truly open? Especially that in this setting?

The old man may have just been a place holder in the dream at first (unless he was apparent immediately), but perhaps once you talked to him, maybe your mind found him the most important person? After all, he was the one controlling the bus and the seat positions. Maybe this shows something about what you wish for? Maybe everyone else didn't get on because your mind was too distracted to board people? Or, it's because in life you're finding that people in college are more "distant" and not willing to get on the bus? Laying in the "territory" of seats you chose, maybe they represent where you feel you are now, in a safe zone in life, and are just waiting to reach your place of comfort. Did the bus driver seem suspicious? Maybe he was controlling the amount of people getting on in a magical, dream way.

2a)

Could this bus represent your former feeling of community and comfort? Maybe it's the image of what you had hoped life after high school would turn into, such as a comfortable place to relax and build relationships.

This driver honestly sounds like a representation of your will or part of your mind. It's telling you that it will get you where you need to, "home," and will carry you in comfort until you felt that you're ready to leave your old life behind.

Since the bus turned into a taxi, was this a representation of your life turning into adulthood? Especially since the bus was at least comparable to a school bus, but changed into a taxi. Your logic may have told you the life of school was not all that awaited you now, but a large world. Or at least, that's my interpretation. Maybe it also represented some lonliness as well? Especially since no one had gotten on the bus, so it downgraded to a comfy yet small taxi? However, your mind might be telling you this is alright, since you felt comfortable.

I also feel like the change of the taxi driver to the Asian Emperor was also representative of your will. Perhaps you are starting to feel like you act like the Asian emperor in real life? Your emotions being quick to change from anger to benevolence? Speaking with you, it may also show that you have a kind relationship with your will, or mind.

I also felt your loss of character came with the lonliness of moving into a taxi by yourself, with the loss of need to be important. Also, this may show that the taxi driver was your inner image as well, as he became the "life" of the taxi, I think.

I agree with your explanation speaking your third language better.

I really do believe the driver was a part of you that you spoke with, since you touched on personal topics. Maybe your mind wanted you to get in touch with itself, and had this situation planned for this?

I feel like the landscapes you looked on to have to do with your transition from your past school life to one you are in now, like you are in a big world with home left to bring comfort.

2b)

The ride and time was perhaps the feeling that you were worried of getting off the ride at some point, and your mind was taking steps to confront this worry. I think the ride represented a journey through the feelings of a transition from accomplishments and your past to one of adulthood and learning more about yourself, and perhaps the end of the ride might be the worry that you wouldn't have the time to slow down again and think over these feelings? Or perhaps it just represented the end of that dream.

Since you past the stop (which I'm assuming was your home), I think the roads became more lonely as your mind worried that the longer you're away from home, the more isolated you can become emotionally out in the world.

Perhaps the 7-11 was in your dream to remind you that you could take comfort in things gone already? Or it may even represent a worry, that your mind is afraid that if you go on a life of isolation for any period of time, you might become too involved with happy but long gone parts of you life you had already moved on from.

Maybe getting drunk with the cab driver and driving around might mean that you were seeing this driver, whatever it represented, like a friend in the lonely landscape and just wanted to feel like normal. Did you feel sad at the end when you sat with the driver at the other 7-11? Or were you happy? Because, in either case, this could indicate where you feel you are now. Since there was no more driving, you may have felt you didn't want to go anywhere anymore. Or, just really wanted a break from what I think was your emotional passage over time.

I feel like this last act was left on a note of mystery. Like, you are just wondering on what's to come next in life, and where the road will take you...

Thanks for the read! I was really interested in who the taxi driver was. Was he a representation of the philosophical "ego" or something? Hmmm...

I also have very long and detailed dreams. I tend to forget mine immediately after, sadly. I think people like you and me who have dreams like this have very strong imaginations? Or maybe there are a lot of emotions that get "put away" during the day? It could be caused for many reasons, I guess.

I agree with Thunder Bow. It's sounds like you are moving on.