[str8uptruthandlove]

I had a dream last night, I lost most of it upon waking but this is what I remember: Losing a 2-person tie-dye contest at a concert with friends.

I didn't recognize anyone in the dream as friends IRL, but in the dream I somehow knew they were friends. The woman I lost the tie-dye contest to was older, I think she was a friend's mom or something.

I used a dream interpretation app, and now I feel like that older woman was my new therapist. Here's what the app said:

Tie-Dye: To see or wear tie-dye suggests that you are feeling upbeat and groovy. You are in a happy mood. It is also symbolic of free love. Perhaps the dream is welcoming a new relationship. You need to open yourself up to love.

This T is a new relationship, I've only seen her twice. So far I really like her, but as always, I'm quite guarded. I feel strangely optimistic about therapy with her, but I'm still 'waiting for the other shoe to drop', since I've had "red-flag" therapists in the past.

Concert: To dream that you are at a concert represents harmony and cooperation in a situation or relationship in your waking life. You are experiencing an uplift in your spirits.

Again, the only thing that makes sense here is therapy. I'm unemployed and anti-social, the only relationship this could possibly describe is the one I'm starting with the new T. Harmony and cooperation sound nice, and sounds like therapy should be. I was slightly less guarded in the 2nd session than the first, which is normal for me. I expect that I'll be even more open in my next session.

Contest: To dream that you enter or are in a contest indicates the need to prove yourself as worthy and deserving. If you win the contest, then it represents your self-confidence, pride, and/or conceit. If you lose the contest,
then it indicates a lack of self-esteem. You may not be fully applying yourself to the task at hand.

This is what really got my attention. The only people in the contest in my dream were myself and this older woman (therapist). And I lost. Or rather, I gave up before even finishing. Obviously I have an issue with self-esteem, there's no denying that. But the last sentence: "you may not be fully applying yourself to the task at hand". YES. I'm terrified that, in therapy, we'll get into triggering stuff that might bring back my PTSD, and worse this time. So I'm not in it with both feet yet, per se.

What do you think? Am I assuming too much here? Obviously this app is not Freud's "The Interpretation of Dreams", but there are enough correlations that I'm mostly convinced. If it meant anything, it was showing me how I feel about my new T. Biggest question: Should I tell her about this dream??

[Thunder Bow]

Do you remember how you felt, losing the contest? Dreams are often about our feeling.

[str8uptruthandlove]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

Do you remember how you felt, losing the contest? Dreams are often about our feeling.

I felt like a quitter. Like I'd failed, yet again. Humiliated, though this older woman didn't say anything and only smiled warmly at me. She didn't seem to care (or maybe even know?) about the contest. It's like I was the only one bothered by it.

[Thunder Bow]

Then this dream might relate to a real life situation you are in. A situation that bothers you, but no one else. A work situation?

[str8uptruthandlove]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

Then this dream might relate to a real life situation you are in. A situation that bothers you, but no one else. A work situation?

"Lack of work" situation makes more sense. I'm an unemployed college dropout; she's a successful professional. I can see how my brain came up with the concept. Interesting. Might be worth talking to her about. She'd probably be disappointed, since she said "stop comparing yourself to others". I couldn't help it! I was asleep! Lol

[Thunder Bow]

Good idea to share, remember, comparing yourself to others is a short cut to feeling bad about yourself. It can be a bad habit that we some times adapted from childhood. Feeling bad about oneself can be hard to let go of, because it is like an old friend, that is hard to say good bye to.

[str8uptruthandlove]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

Good idea to share, remember, comparing yourself to others is a short cut to feeling bad about yourself. It can be a bad habit that we some times adapted from childhood. Feeling bad about oneself can be hard to let go of, because it is like an old friend, that is hard to say good bye to.

Makes all too much sense. I definitely need to work on that. I admit, I've been making myself feel bad for way too long now. And I think I will share this dream with her during our session on Friday. Thanks!