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Michael2Wolves
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Default Feb 11, 2021 at 08:41 PM
  #1
I don't dream anymore. Ever.

The last dream I had I woke up at 3 in the morning with The Night We Met playing so loudly in my head that I thought I had the radio on. I was waking up a lot at 3 in the morning during that time.

I have raging untreated mental illness and have no desire to get on meds because IDGAF and I'm not interested in helping myself. For what? Pff. No, thanks.

When I was a child, my dreams would be precognitive and got so disturbing at one point that I lost friends after telling one that someone in a red shirt was about to walk out of a class, and then did.

The most vivid dreams I've had in prison were of me dying from gunshots to the head. Three times I dreamed of it, but only remember one vaguely. I keep hearing that line from Mad World as I type this: I think it's kinda funny, I think it's kinda sad, the dreams in which I'm dying were the best I ever had.
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Default Feb 12, 2021 at 01:10 AM
  #2
Yes. Being a sufferer of mental health problems as well, I've had long periods of dreamlessness too @Michael2Wolves. And looking back I believe, for me at least, that it was directly related to the deep depression and hopelessness I was enduring at that time, day in and day out. Maybe the brain doesn't want to dream or maybe the dream recall part of the brain just stops functioning properly under those circumstances. I don't know, I'm just speculating. 🙏

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Default Feb 12, 2021 at 09:33 AM
  #3
I can't help but feel it is symptomatic of something more serious in the condition of my soul, as though I've crossed some metaphyiscal line of no return. Nothing in life goes right, so we escape to sleep, only, I don't even dream anymore, so what's the point?
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Default Feb 12, 2021 at 07:13 PM
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Yeah, I hear you. I try to be optimistic so I wonder if it could be a blessing in disguise in some ways? After all, a lot of dreams upon waking, just leave the person feeling confused and even upset. These days, for me, my dreams seem to be direct reflections of the things I've gone through that day. So it's still there even in my sleep. No escape! But, I still like dreaming, yes.

Do you sleep well @Michael2Wolves? Sometimes irregular sleep patterns can effect the ability to dream. There could be a number of other causes too.

Also I just want to say if you can find that something which brings you meaning and joy, something positive, then it can become like a foundation and an anchor, a support, to get you through very difficult times or just through life in general.

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Default Feb 13, 2021 at 01:05 AM
  #5
You are more than likely still dreaming only you are not remembering what you dream. If you had a sleep test they monitor your brain activity and can tell when you are in rem sleep.
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Default Feb 13, 2021 at 07:41 AM
  #6
What are you eating. I found when I started fasting my dreams came back amazingly. I believe this is because you go into ketosis and ketones are energy bodies used by the brain.

You can't go into ketosis (and thus get ketone body energy) when you eat carbs. Then you just get the bear minimum to run your brain off glucose.
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Default Feb 22, 2021 at 08:14 PM
  #7
I sleep, but it's heavy and instant. I close my eyes, poof. I wake up. As I begin to question reality itself more and more (as my perspective itself seems to shift), I often find my thoughts wandering to more existential lines, such as wondering if I'm already dead and this is just hell on a loop. lmao I'm sure I have "rem" dreams, but those (when I remember them) are trash. Nothing of note and just random crap that makes no sense, is quickly forgotten, and leaves a hollow behind in time, like, here was a where a dream was supposed to occur, but nope.

Lol Patterns. I visualize things in my head most days as nothing but fractal patterns, and I just have to find the connections, if that makes sense. I see things in terms of probability. And I've searched for forty years for meaning and something to anchor to, and nothing satisfies. Some days, I think I am stuck psychologically at a much younger age than my physicality presents. I'm still in my early thirties or late twenties, and think and act as such, and the estrangement from my own peer group as they subtly sense something "off" about me continues to grow wider and wider with each passing year. I barely recognize my own face in the mirror. Whoever this older person is, I am not he.

And dreaming is just the icing on the cake, really. A reason for me to wonder if I've finally broken something for good. Diet is terrible, and I am sure that plays a part in it.

I feel more the emptiness of space where dreams once lay dormant in my psyche, if that makes sense. Not just that the dreams are gone, the ability to dream is gone as well.
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Default Jun 01, 2021 at 07:51 PM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael2Wolves View Post
I don't dream anymore. Ever.

The last dream I had I woke up at 3 in the morning with The Night We Met playing so loudly in my head that I thought I had the radio on. I was waking up a lot at 3 in the morning during that time.

I have raging untreated mental illness and have no desire to get on meds because IDGAF and I'm not interested in helping myself. For what? Pff. No, thanks.

When I was a child, my dreams would be precognitive and got so disturbing at one point that I lost friends after telling one that someone in a red shirt was about to walk out of a class, and then did.

The most vivid dreams I've had in prison were of me dying from gunshots to the head. Three times I dreamed of it, but only remember one vaguely. I keep hearing that line from Mad World as I type this: I think it's kinda funny, I think it's kinda sad, the dreams in which I'm dying were the best I ever had.

I don't know what happened in your case but here's one possible reason, based on my experiences. When I developed cPTSD, I never noticed that I lost my ability to have normal dreams until they did start to come back. That was when I noticed that I lost them temporarily. And I just firmly believe that trauma (in my case cPTSD) results in extraordinary changes in the brain to help you adapt and survive. Part of the changes affect the memory system. As part of that change, is probably why dreams are affected too. Your whole way of processing information changes, including how memories work for you. I think it may help with survival much like other changes do, such as the changes in the automatic nervous system, changes to how your emotions work, and so on. Because if you were to just try and take in the whole madness (that caused the trauma) in one go, you'd not survive that. This way however, you get a chance to process things and survive and move forward in the end.

The emptiness in space you mention, could be part of that, too. I've had it too.
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Default Jun 01, 2021 at 08:37 PM
  #9
...but I want my dreams back...I fear that loss of dreams means that I won't even get to enjoy a psuedo-afterlife because it's probably indicative of calcification of the pineal gland. See? I read way too much. I know too much.

"With the more one knows,
faster the lunacy grows,
sprung from knowledge gained
to form a hallowed pain..."

Looking back at what I've written in this thread, I realize I'm beginning to lose sight of the line where reality ends and delusion begins. I keep learning more, and knowledge is a drug like any other for me. Yeah, I feel that space, that missing something, and it's like what you would imagine someone might feel if someone else were to go back in time and mess with that person's timeline. Only, I see more than just my own timeline--I see all the probable timelines I can choose from in each moment. Not in any detail, but I can "focus-in" and explore each of them in detail and follow back the "tree" to now to see how those possibilities connect.

And here's the kicker. That dream I mention, about getting shot in the head? I think I'm in the house where it happens, because I moved to Austin, and lo and behold, my office has that vague familiarity I recognize from the dream. I think it's the light from the window, but still. It's kind of eerie. It all kind of leaving me rather exhausted and so I just sort of drift ghost-like from day to day.
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Default Jun 18, 2021 at 05:50 PM
  #10
I have also lost the ability to dream. It all happened when I lived with my sister. I smoked pot a few times, and drank alcohol a few times, and smoked/still do smoke cigarettes. My most vivid dreaming experience happened when I woke up from sleep and I couldn't talk or move. I tried yelling to my sister. And I couldn't. After that it was just bad dream until it went away. Some really scary stuff. I was taken under the bed in one, and it really felt like someone was trying to pull me under there. I had that sleep paralysis about 3 times in my life. I kept dreaming bad dreams. I dreampt once someone was growling at me from inside my head, and so I was growling in reality. I also dreampt that King David or someone that looked just like him (and my first thought was I am meeting Satan in my dreams). His castle was made of dolls that looked grotesque as paintings. And suddenly my feet were being thrown in midair and I was being dragged in circles. Eventually I was not dreaming at all.
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Default Jun 18, 2021 at 10:32 PM
  #11
Sounds more like it may have been a blessing for you--those sound frightening indeed. For me, it's been a mixed bag. The more lucid the dream, the more likely it was precognitive. Although I have had sleep paralysis. It was weird, though.

I woke up, but couldn't move, and was barely awake, like I was trying to fight off the effects of a drug, and I couldn't move or do more than moan. I swear I thought I saw a shadow in the room of a person. Eventually, I fell back into an uneasy sleep. When I woke up the next morning, my neighbor told me she'd seen a black car pull up about 4 am, and three dudes in black get out and go into my back yard and around the side of the house where my window was. She said they were gone for 10-15 minutes, then re-appeared, got into the car, and drove away.
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