FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
|
Veteran Member
Member Since Dec 2016
Location: Russia
Posts: 634
7 |
#1
I was stopped by a couple people who tried to scam me with some fake antique coins (although that's only an assumption on my part). I was honest and helpful until they actually started talking about money, at which point I hastily retreated. After that I felt like ****. Fortunately it was at the beginning of my daily walk, which I sorely needed, but I thought about going back home I was so rotten. And you might think that it's an unlucky exception, but actually I've ever only been stopped by rude or unpleasant people, and never for anything fun or useful. I think part of it is just the way it works, also my social anxiety makes pretty much any interaction with a stranger unpleasant, and maybe it has a bit to do with living in Russia which is notorious for grumpy people in certain circles.
I just started thinking how I'd avoid that crap. Is it better to lie that I'm in a hurry? Or I had this outlandish idea: apologize in a foreign language (which I actually speak, of course), although that seems a bit too extreme if not completely impossible in my state, and I also don't look like a foreigner (if that makes sense). I also feel a lot like stopping walks and hiding at home again... but that is bad for me. However, it's no good if I have to relax after an activity that I was supposed to do to relax. |
Reply With Quote |
Paula M. Won, unaluna
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2015
Location: earth
Posts: 3,029
9 1,884 hugs
given |
#2
You don't require an excuse to not interact with a stranger. Have you tried just ignoring them and walking on?
__________________ Eat a live frog for breakfast every morning and nothing worse can happen to you that day! "Ask yourself whether the dream of heaven and greatness should be left waiting for us in our graves - or whether it should be ours here and now and on this earth.” Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged Bipolar type 2 rapid cycling DX 2013 - Seroquel 100 Celexa 20 mg Xanax .5 mg prn Modafanil 100 mg |
Reply With Quote |
ArcheM, Bill3
|
Veteran Member
Member Since Dec 2016
Location: Russia
Posts: 634
7 |
#3
I guess I should. Come to think of it, I always keep stopping. Well, I kind of often walk in deserted areas, although today it's not the excuse. But still, it was me, those two guys, and an empty street... I guess it's an even better excuse to keep going... I mean, they can't have done to me anything worse behind my back than what they tried face to face.
|
Reply With Quote |
Account Suspended
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: California Uber Alles
Posts: 9,150
(SuperPoster!)
9 5,382 hugs
given |
#4
You just keep walking, as though you're a machine. Do not stop.
|
Reply With Quote |
ArcheM
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#5
Ugh, I get people trying to stop me downtown all the time. I just keep walking. Most people do with all the people handing you cds or asking for money. Don't feel bad; you don't owe anyone a response.
|
Reply With Quote |
ArcheM
|
Legendary
Member Since Jan 2009
Location: Uppa Gumtree West
Posts: 19,397
(SuperPoster!)
15 7,984 hugs
given |
#6
If your wear earphones people will assume you are listening to music and not bother you.
|
Reply With Quote |
MDDBPDPTSD
|
Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2010
Location: United States
Posts: 509
13 249 hugs
given |
#7
__________________ Practicing being here now. |
Reply With Quote |
Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
(SuperPoster!)
8 17.4k hugs
given |
#8
I have a small dog I walk daily. By-&-large people where I live just ignore each other. Also... during the winter there don't tend to be a lot of people out walking. So it's not typically a problem anyway. During the summer I wear a wide-brimmed hat with the vizor pulled down over my eyes so I avoid eye contact with people. I also typically wear sunglasses.
On the off occasion when someone does try to tag me for something, I just shake my head "no" & keep walking. (I also carry a big walking stick which could, under the right circumstances, be used as a weapon!) I suspect, over time, I've probably developed something of a reputation around the community I live in as being anti-social. To quote Popeye: "I yam what I yam & that's all what I yam..." |
Reply With Quote |
Veteran Member
Member Since Dec 2016
Location: Russia
Posts: 634
7 |
#9
I was, though! I don't think this has ever deterred anyone from trying to initiate an interaction. In fact, they often don't care if I'm able to hear them, seemingly... I guess maybe if I wore my big "indoors" headphones, instead of earbuds, it would be more obvious.
|
Reply With Quote |
possum220
|
MDDBPDPTSD
|
Account Suspended
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: In Heaven
Posts: 420
6 265 hugs
given |
#10
To avoid someone, just tell them "No Thanks!"
or Avoid contact. Keep walking. |
Reply With Quote |
Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 40,096
(SuperPoster!)
12 66.9k hugs
given |
#11
In olden times, it was actually RUDE for a gentleman to speak to a lady to whom he had not been introduced. That is probably not the case here, but ive seen police say on tv that too often people are victimized because they dont want to appear rude. But the people who are mugging them are being VERY rude! So, dont worry about being rude. Worry more about how to ensure your walks are undisturbed - maybe walk in slightly less deserted areas?
|
Reply With Quote |
Veteran Member
Member Since Dec 2016
Location: Russia
Posts: 634
7 |
#12
Oh, I've been limiting my walking between 7 and 9 AM for the past, well, 6 months, and pretty much avoided any inopportune interruptions (and queues in stores), except maybe once or twice on the back leg when, presumably, meddlers start waking up.
Well, this might not apply for everyone, depending on your work schedule, but I work from home, so. __________________ Social anxiety and possible Aspergers (undiagnosed, but it helps to let you know to more quickly find a common ground). Life is a journey without a destination. |
Reply With Quote |
MDDBPDPTSD
|
Member
Member Since Apr 2017
Location: Seattle, Washington
Posts: 25
7 |
#13
I deal with this on occasion, I'll be on the bus with both ear buds in and my nose in a book. Idk, but some people don't have much in the way of mindfulness or awareness. It's frustrating for me, because I generally like people, but these days, they make me nervous.
|
Reply With Quote |
Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
(SuperPoster!)
8 17.4k hugs
given |
#14
When I walk I wear a hat with a wide brim pulled down to shield my eyes from other peoples' gazes. I also wear sunglasses unless it's really overcast. I keep my gaze down toward the sidewalk in front of me (useful for avoiding stepping in something I wouldn't want to take home.) And I carry big walking stick! Nobody bothers me...
|
Reply With Quote |
seeker33
|
Angelique67
|
Member
Member Since Nov 2018
Location: North East America
Posts: 34
5 3 hugs
given |
#15
Get some ear buds and stick them in your ears. You don't have to plug them into any device, just have them in your ears. People will think you can't hear them and won't bother trying.
I used to do this when I worked in a gas station and customers would come in and ***** about everything/anything as if I could do anything about it...wear ear phones, and they keep to themselves. They were happy I could hear them well enough to take their orders. Worked every time. Oops people have already suggested this...Russia might be different, different culture. Cheer up, America is getting worse! |
Reply With Quote |
Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
5 1,520 hugs
given |
#16
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
New Member
Member Since Apr 2018
Location: germany
Posts: 6
6 |
#17
you don't have to be nice to strangers. be as rude as you want. really, people won't be able to take advantage of you that easily
|
Reply With Quote |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#18
You can switch from walking to jogging mode when you are passing by these people; and once you are far enough, switching back to walking mode.
|
Reply With Quote |
Reply |
|