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AzulOscuro
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Default Oct 05, 2020 at 10:05 AM
  #1
I hate to tell it and I know whoever could say the same but it's truth.

Today, I was out there "socialising" alone, without my partner, I had one of those moments that made me remember that I was not a normal person. An irrational fear came to my mind and stopped my normal functioning. It was very simple. I'm even embarrassed to mentioned it. I see it ridiculous and I'm a grown person. I'm not a "child".

I was gonna write a thread here ranting about my poor luck and how my life is full of situations like that. Where you feel more and more tiny each day.

Suddenly, I thought...what if tomorrow I do the exact thing and go to the same place, look for the same people and eat my ****ing anxiety. And I do it also the next day, and the day after the next day...There's not other way. I promise you. You only can get beat your fears if you give yourself the opportunity.
I know it's not easy. But you have the guts to do it.

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Social Anxiety and Depression. Cluster C traits.
Trying to improve my English. My apologies for errors and mistakes in advance.

Mankind is complex: Make deserts blossom and lakes die. ( GIL SCOTT-HERSON)
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Default Nov 22, 2020 at 10:15 AM
  #2
Hey Azul.👋 I totally hear you, friend.

I used to do exactly what you mentioned. If I had a really bad time at a specific place, if my social anxiety got triggered very badly (which was very very often, every day, for a while there) first I'd come home to collect myself and to process the inner turmoil. And I'd feel so disappointed in myself for not being able to just be around people without it totally doing my head in, that I'd head straight back to the place where I got triggered to kind of 'even things up' in my mind. And I did that in the worst emotional states I've known. Awful.

At the very least, by doing that, I could come home and say to myself "at least I'm not letting my mental illness have the final say". Those were mad, mad times, though. Wasn't that long ago either. But in a way it was good for me. I'm doing better these days.🙂
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Default Nov 26, 2020 at 11:06 AM
  #3
I come back to repeat the activity that provoked me anxiety when I see it’s something I can face to with a tolerable level of anxiety and if I’m feeling more or less balance in my mood.
I kind of try to do the experience as much positive as possible if not, I know that I might reject to do it.

But, if I’m sure of one thing, is that the only way you can kind of control a situation is by experiencing it.

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Social Anxiety and Depression. Cluster C traits.
Trying to improve my English. My apologies for errors and mistakes in advance.

Mankind is complex: Make deserts blossom and lakes die. ( GIL SCOTT-HERSON)
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