[butterflykisses13]

I am having major body image issues, and it is effecting my relationship with my long distance boyfriend of two years. I am obese, and he is average. I cannot fathom why he thinks I am beautiful. My stomach is huge, my legs are chunky...I could go on. Has anyone else gone through this before?

[kitty004567]

My best advice is listen to him! He thinks you're beautiful and he cares about you I have some body image issues and I had a therapist who kept telling me to "fake it, till you make it." Yes, intellectually you probably know better than to listen to external validation to boost your self esteem. But perhaps instead of working to convince yourself you're right and your body is a problem, why not work on convincing yourself that he's right and you are beautiful?

I also had a doctor who had me write a positive mantra about myself every time I wrote in my journal which was daily something to the extent of I love myself for me and write down one good thing about myself each time. Hopefully something different but even the same thing. I found that helped a lot too.

[kitty004567]

I also took down my bathroom mirror (a move my therapist doesn't really like). I had my bathroom redone about a year ago. I realized while they were doing the construction just how much time I stood in front of that mirror criticizing myself. There's still a mirror in my other bathroom and on the inside of my closet door. I try to only use them to double check my appearance or when applying makeup or styling my hair (I don't wear makeup daily and my hair grows straight so usually I throw on whatever, run a brush through my hair and I'm ready to go) I understand that's not a possibility for everyone. Instead, hanging in the mirror's place is a pretty thumb tack board that I add to whenever I feel the need. The quote in the middle, at eye level says "you know what's beautiful? Read the first word again."

[hamster-bamster]

I am so glad he finds you beautiful. Do not doubt his words. This so great that the twoof you found each other two years ago. I hope you get to see him and hold him often.

I recently went from nicely overweight to low obese due to indiscriminate use of Zyprexa. I was afraid my average partner would react negatively because in the past my earlier partners did, in similar situations. He did not even notice. When I mentioned it he did not pick it up as a topic for a conversation.