[Jay_Smiley]

Today, in class my friend was talking to some girls and they kept goosiping about me, saying they hated me because I have a flat face and apparently a flat chest and because my fringe is wrong :'( I'd never even spoken to these two and yet they didn't like me because of how I look. They are in my Math class but I've never spoken to them.. I didn't even know their names.

Great self-esteem boost that was.

[Travelinglady]

Well, this statement might not be a consolation at your age, but these people are really shallow! They can't really "hate" you if they don't even know you. And looks are so superficial.

By the way, what's a "fringe"? (Sorry, but I am rather an old lady.)

[Jay_Smiley]

Fringe - A fringe, or bangs, is a shaped cutting of the front part of the hair so that it lies over the forehead. A classic fringe (bang) is cut fairly straight at or above the eyebrows, but they can also be ragged or ruffled, spiked up with hair gel, swept to one side or the other, or cut longer to fall over the eyes

[Travelinglady]

Okay, I know what bangs are. They don't like your bangs? That's even more superficial--hair grows and can be cut. It's not like it's something that nothing can be done about.

I'm wondering about these people's self-esteem. Folks who put down other people are often times trying to build themselves up.

My suggestion: Try not to let them see you sweat--i.e., pay them no attention. I know it's not easy, but if they see they aren't getting to you, then they will likely give up at some point. Be glad they aren't your friends. Who wants petty friends like them?

[BuffaloRoadhouse]

Originally Posted by Jay_Smiley

Today, in class my friend was talking to some girls and they kept goosiping about me, saying they hated me because I have a flat face and apparently a flat chest and because my fringe is wrong :'( I'd never even spoken to these two and yet they didn't like me because of how I look. They are in my Math class but I've never spoken to them.. I didn't even know their names.

Great self-esteem boost that was.

Jay, Hi! I am a retired principal (grades 6-12) and have been an educator working with children for more years that I would like to admit. They have all been exciting though. I want you to know that you are not alone. So many of my students have spent more time with our counselors offices negotiating just what you described. It even happened to my own children and today they are successful women, wonderful mothers on a wonderful journey. If you don't believe me I Recommend this exercise. Design a survey & ask older students and adults... They will tell you that they or friends or...have been through what you call, "They hate me" syndrome. Unfortunately some kids can be cruel. They know not what they do...but that is their problem. Don't make it yours.
I understand that what you are going through at this time is painful. Funny I just finished reading an article about high school in a magazine called The Week, 4/26, entitled "In High School Forever" I quote the writer Jennifer Senior, "The self-image we develop in high school can continue to define us long after graduation." And make sure you read it to the end because she talks about "gossip'. Suggest that you don't let anyone take away the significance of who you are becoming in these important years. Consider you are not going to stay where you are for the rest of your life. Your body will change. You will grow physically & develop mentally and emotionally resulting in the development of a strong self image leading you to an interesting, productive and joyful life. You will gain control of your destiny. Adolescence can be difficult, no question. But it is a learning period. So much going on that sometimes is tough to understand. Suggest you Take the high road and develop a plan that supports you to be all that you can be...Develop healthy practices and Soar my friend. Another suggestion, seek supportive and positive networks. Speak to your counselors. Check to see if there is a network of students who are dealing with some of this 'stuff'. Maybe you want to write about it. Start your own blog and have conversations that are positive. Keep your eye on the prize and that is you developing your inner strength..and remember you have taken an important step by joining this network. And congratulations for putting your feelings out there. It starts the conversation that will provide you a journey of finding solutions...And remember to enjoy each day.

Don't listen to them! I know it is hard I have the same problem. But you can do it. They are just stupid,and I bet you are way prettier then them. My advice is just try to block them out. They don't know what they are saying. Your beautiful.

[outlaw sammy]

I TOTALLY AGREE with BuffaloRoadHouse! He's right - so listen to his words of wisdom.