[Eleny]

My low self esteem is killing me. I struggle with Time management and always have. Growing up my mother was not great with getting me to school on time, or sometimes at all, so I think it stems from here.

Recently my manager brought it up with me and it's now all I can think about it. I hate myself, I don't know why I can't be on time and I keep thinking about what my manager must think of me and I just feel so worthless. I'm trying my best but I just keep falling short and it's really getting me down. I feel like a failure.

Any advice at all to deal with this would be great

[IceCreamKid]

Originally Posted by Eleny

My low self esteem is killing me. I struggle with Time management and always have. Growing up my mother was not great with getting me to school on time, or sometimes at all, so I think it stems from here.

Recently my manager brought it up with me and it's now all I can think about it. I hate myself, I don't know why I can't be on time and I keep thinking about what my manager must think of me and I just feel so worthless. I'm trying my best but I just keep falling short and it's really getting me down. I feel like a failure.

Any advice at all to deal with this would be great

Do you have attention problems? People with ADD can have trouble with time management. You might mention this to your doctor and she what she/he says. Have you tried the following?

Keep the things you need like every day in a predictable place: for example, I always keep my keys in my purse, not my coat pocket, not the table. Even if I am going out without my purse, I know where to find my keys; then when I come back inside, I put them back in my purse.

Do things the same way as often as possible. If you are able to do this at work, do tasks in a predictable order so that you know you will get them done.

Make sure you are not being given too much to do at work. Management likes to complain about employees not getting work done without being willing to admit they are asking employees to do the work of 2-3 people. If this seems the case where you work, ask the boss to sit with you and prioritize what needs to be done, and how long reasonably it takes to do whatever it is.

Stop blaming your mother. Whatever her shortcomings, you can take care of yourself now. You're in charge.

If you have not already, read about self-esteem. There are many books out there to help.

[avlady]

i agree with ice cream kid

[eskielover]

Ugh I've always walked to my own time unless something was specifically time critical like deadlines I had to meet but even that I always put in extreme amounts of time outside of the clock structure. I always pile more in my spaces of time than I can get done so I'm always late to the next thing in the day. Only when the next thing is time critical & extremely high priority will I stop what I'm doing early to make sure I meet that time demand.

I grew up with parents who were on time to the few things they did do. I was always slow doing things partly from a perfectionist view of how things needed to be done & being careful how I did things.

Got through my BS degree & my computer engineering career never had time clock arrivals at work or going home times...just worked until I hit a good wrap it up place to go home...it worked great for my personality. Would play racquetball with the guys at lunch & we got back to work after we finished the game & continued on with our work. We never planned things on days when time was critical like meetings with our military customer. I have always been a free spirit & only when I set a specific time. Even my pain specialist appointments are flexible as they work my treatment in between other patients....I try hard to be on time as close as possible but for me 15 minutes off is on time.

My dogs are like kids also, the more I'm pushing to be on time you can bet they will make a mess I have to clean up....dumped their whole bucket of water just as I was trying to fly out the door.

My free spirit usually wins though I was always on time for classes, that was probably the only thing in my 62 years of living that I really put effort into being on time for because I knew it was critical.

Don't think I would have survived working at a job thar required set time in & out verses just getting the job complete.

[BlueCrustacean]

You can wake up and just watch this in bed before you get up and start the day. It's a self-esteem morning meditation. I used it this morning and it turned my whole day around from what started as a negative pit to a positive, hopeful, energized, productive day. You can listen to it every single morning to raise your self-esteem, and thus help you to be more naturally productive and energetic.

[ShineYourLight]

Low self-esteem is an easy one! KNOW YOURSELF KNOW YOUR WORTH. sounds hard right haha. Your need to start embracing yourself. You need to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. Im going to accept the bad parts and mistakes about me. message me if you want more help

[2B/-2B]

Originally Posted by Eleny

My low self esteem is killing me. I struggle with Time management and always have. Growing up my mother was not great with getting me to school on time, or sometimes at all, so I think it stems from here.

Recently my manager brought it up with me and it's now all I can think about it. I hate myself, I don't know why I can't be on time and I keep thinking about what my manager must think of me and I just feel so worthless. I'm trying my best but I just keep falling short and it's really getting me down. I feel like a failure.

Any advice at all to deal with this would be great

Hello Eleny.
Lets say you are always 5 minutes late to work.

Set the alarm clock 10 minutes earlier.
Set out your work clothes, and have whatever else ready for work, before retiring.
In the morning, focus on getting out the door ten minutes earlier.
Once you are out the door, it's done, you'll be at work earlier.

[Eleny]

Originally Posted by 2B/-2B

Hello Eleny.
Lets say you are always 5 minutes late to work.

Set the alarm clock 10 minutes earlier.
Set out your work clothes, and have whatever else ready for work, before retiring.
In the morning, focus on getting out the door ten minutes earlier.
Once you are out the door, it's done, you'll be at work earlier.

Thank you for this advice. I'm just so tired most mornings I literally can't get out of bed no matter what time I set the alarm, so maybe I should also try going to bed earlier?

[2B/-2B]

Originally Posted by Eleny

Thank you for this advice. I'm just so tired most mornings I literally can't get out of bed no matter what time I set the alarm, so maybe I should also try going to bed earlier?

Great idea Eleny.

Why do you have hard time getting out of bed? How many hours do you sleep on average? I watched once a documentary about social anxiety, and there was this woman who was dying to go to work because of her anxiety. I skip many activities because of my shyness/social anxiety. Luckily, my work doesn't demand mingling with people or to be on time. But still it affects my self-esteem.

Anxiety ---> social withdrawal ----> Loneliness ----> Depression -----> Work less effective ----> Bad self-image ----> Low self-esteem.

Hope you'll find the answer.