[psycenhelp]

Hello all .

As I said in my old post: Anxiety at work = PROBLEMS, I found a solution to my problem but it worked for me a few days, just now it hasn't any effect to me. I'm going to say my problem: when I have some responsibility (for example in the work) I feel worse, with anxiety, sad, introvert, PERFECTIONISM, loss hair,... I feel that I will like to work without any responsibility (I don't know in a farm, or like sweeper, etc).

In general all my bad feelings are occasioned for my low self-esteem (I think). When I drink alcohol (2 or 3 glas of beer) I feel much better, extrovert, I feel a good self-esteem (without: anxiety, sad, PERFECTIONISM...).

I'm going to write some examples:

- For example 1 (with low self-esteem): I receive a laptop and I have to repair something then I start to think "Oh my god, I can damage something if I have some error. I have to be perfect, if I'm not sure about what is the problem DON'T TOUCH, you could damage the laptop and you WILL HAVE TO PAY IT.". Here I feel an extreme responsibility, pressure, anxiety, etc.
- For example 1 (with good self-esteem): (The same case) I start to think "Ok, I'm going to find the problem then I have to check components to find the problem, here we go!". Here I'm focus on try stuff to find the problem (I'm not focus on error).

(I have drive license but I don't drive -I feel fear-)
- For example 2 (with low self-esteem): I think in drive the car and I say "Oh my god, I could crash, I could run over person, I could parking and crash, ... Then I could go to judge, I will have post trauma all my life, my family will see to me in a different light"
- For example 2 (with good self-esteem): (The same case) I say "Oh yes I can do it. I could do it perfect. I could do it better than others". Here I don't contemplate the worst scenarios.

Then my conclusion is: "If you think a lot probably you will think/do the worst (you will get low self-esteem), you have to be a little crazy without think a lot (then you will get good self-esteem)". It's easy to say it but difficult to apply, my mind can't change easily. NOTE: I don't know if I'm right with that sentence.

I don't want to drink alcohol for get a good self-esteem. I need tips to get it without alcohol. NOTE: I'm not alcoholic, I only drink on weekends.

Thanksss

[psycenhelp]

Thank you for your comment omegalamed

Any reply?

Last weekend I was drinking alcohol again. I noticed when people feel stress and/or bad start to drink alcohol, or smoke a lot, or eat junk food, or ... (only bad stuffs for your body and mind).

I noticed that What happen with police for example, they are people like anyone, then How can they hold pressure from demonstrators, violent people, bad comments,...? Have they some technique to reduce instantly the stress?

Alcohol removes inhibitions and relaxes, so maybe you can look at other ways to relax?

Some suggestions I have either tried myself or read about:

1) Meditation, with or without yoga. Focusing on calming breathing.

2) Exercise, something gentle like walking or swimming can reduce anxiety.

3) Watching a favourite uplifting movie/comedy. Laughter reduces stress and is relaxing.

4) Some people find arts/crafts relaxing.

5) I personally find cooking relaxing, even better it can be nutritious and healthy too.

6) Some people (myself included) find it relaxing to clean the home.

7) It can be relaxing to garden/grow plants from seed/work the soil.

8) It can also be relaxing to spend time in beautiful gardens enjoying nature.

I'm sure there are many more I haven't listed, I have used 'some people' and 'can be' a lot because what relaxes one person won't necessarily work for everyone - but it's a starting point for you.

[psycenhelp]

Thank you prefabsprout . I will try to apply some suggestions that you said: 2) (but in this case run) and 3) .

But I have a big problems to apply them when I HAVE TO DEAL WITH BIG PROBLEMS REPAIRING COMPUTERS (I'm unemployed, I do this to get experience).

So when I deal with DIFFICULT problems and I need days to fix it (many times I don't find solution and I have to give the computer to the customer) my mind say "ehhh stop to do X because you have to repair the computer and BE CAREFUL YOU COULD BROKE IT AND YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY IT". Each time that I think in the sentence, that I wrote in capital letter generate to me a lot stress. The sentence come to me in each moment: When I'm watching the TV my mind say "ehhhh, you are waste time and you have to repair the computer, go go go!!" ; when I have to go out with my friends I can't, I say them "I can't go out I have to repair a computer" ; when I think to do some exercise my mind say "ehhhh, the computer is most important that exercise, you have to repair it NOW" ; etc etc.

As you can see my mind can't disconnect from the problem, my mind prioritize tasks automatically and always the first is solve the big problem. One day I had to repair a computer, it was a big problem, I don't know why but the laptop LOST DATA!!!, that day my mind could not stop to think in the problem, I had that day diarrhoea, I ate little, I sleep little.

In a simple-medium problems I usually have a good life. The problem comes when I have to deal with a big problem then my mind going crazy, I can't stop to think in the problem. Then a "fast relax" like alcohol could relax me instantly but it's unhealthy I need a healthy "fast relax" for these cases.

[Fuzzybear]

I found an article on relaxation techniques which you might like to read:

Relaxation Techniques for Stress Relief: Finding the Relaxation Exercises That Work for You

In the article they mostly discuss stress but I think this would work also for anxious thoughts such as you describe.