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Member
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: Westmont, IL, USA
Posts: 31
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#1
I had somewhat of an abnormal childhood during which I avoided social situations. As a result I developed maladaptive social habits. These habits lingered into adulthood. I also had a posture problem which I tried to correct in a way that caused people to think I was strange. I would kind of try to straighten myself out by changing my head angle which appeared like I was glaring at others. Now I have the posture thing straightened out (no pun intended). However, when people see me they start to treat me differently because they see I am self-conscious about the issue. They start to watch me like a hawk and now when someone is around me they won't let me include them in my vision even though they would probably let someone else in the same situation do so. The result is frustration and an inferior existence. Would improving my self-esteem allow me to become less self-conscious over the issue and stop sending out signals that I am different should be treated that way?
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Elder
Member Since Jul 2017
Location: MO
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#2
Hi, svgandhi,
Yes, it will. Do you see a therapist? Who are the people who watch you like a hawk? Are you in school or do you work? __________________ "Love you. Take care of you. Be true to you. You are the only you, you will ever know the best. Reach for YOUR stars. You can reach them better than anyone else ever can." Landon Clary Eason Grateful Sobriety Fangirl Since 11-16-2007 Happy Sober Crafter |
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Member
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: Westmont, IL, USA
Posts: 31
6 |
#3
I am in the process determining a career direction. I am neither in school or work.
Mostly whenever I go anywhere such as a grocery store or out of my house I feel that people watch to see if any part of them is within my vision. Ever since the posture thing I became self-conscious about how to deal with controlling my vision. As a consequence I became careful about including any person within my vision even if it was perfectly normal to do so. As a consequence my development became stunted. When I tried to correct this people became wary because of my self consciousness. I do see a therapist who specializes in Social Anxiety. |
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Elder
Member Since Jul 2017
Location: MO
Posts: 5,677
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#4
I am glad to hear you are seeing a therapist who specializes in Social Anxiety. Good for you! How long have you been in therapy?
Are you saying you avoid eye-contact? I don't understand what you mean by "people watch to see if any part of them is within my vision". __________________ "Love you. Take care of you. Be true to you. You are the only you, you will ever know the best. Reach for YOUR stars. You can reach them better than anyone else ever can." Landon Clary Eason Grateful Sobriety Fangirl Since 11-16-2007 Happy Sober Crafter |
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Member
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: Westmont, IL, USA
Posts: 31
6 |
#5
A normal person probably does not think about the process of seeing. I am self-conscious about this process. In the past I would get angry looks from people because of the way I was acting. I had bad posture. I would try to correct it by changing the angle of my neck, head, and body which might have seemed like I was glaring at someone. Now people watch my eyes very carefully to see whether I am looking at them.
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Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2019
Location: Aruba
Posts: 23
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#6
Building self-esteem does help a lot in not worrying about what others think, and I can assure you that from personal experience. Have you tried writing a list of positive qualities that you have about yourself along with any talents and/or achievements? That definitely can help a lot.
__________________ Want some tips on overcoming low-self esteem, Childhood Emotional Neglect or improving yourself? Check my blog! https://authenticyou93.blogspot.com/ |
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Elder
Member Since Jul 2017
Location: MO
Posts: 5,677
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6 9,930 hugs
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#7
@meetlaw
Do you talk to your therapist about this? He or she could recommend some reading to help you learn about this. __________________ "Love you. Take care of you. Be true to you. You are the only you, you will ever know the best. Reach for YOUR stars. You can reach them better than anyone else ever can." Landon Clary Eason Grateful Sobriety Fangirl Since 11-16-2007 Happy Sober Crafter |
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