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Dnepro
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Member Since: Aug 2020
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Question Aug 01, 2020 at 02:14 AM
  #1
Hello.
I have problems with my self-esteem.
In one popular psychology book (written by not english authors) I found a mention of one method which they explained very briefly.

I wonder where they picked it, is there some serious(not popular) book where it would be good explained. Maybe someone met this method mentioned.

The point of this method is:
1) You choose some person you very much respect and would like to be like him/her.
It might be a real man/woman or some person from a movie/tv-series etc.
2) You imagine yourseft being him and try to behave like that person. At first in the situations when only strangers involved, not people who know you
3) And the theory promises that gradually the characteristics of that person would grow in (or leak in) to your own self concept. And you will change.


Thanks.
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Default Aug 02, 2020 at 03:35 PM
  #2
I have not read of this method specifically, but I used something like it when I was younger. I met an older woman who I admired, wrote in my journal her qualities I most wanted to learn, then focused on behaving in ways more consistent with the grace I saw in her. One year later, I could see in my journal that I had in fact made progress in my own growth and had a better self concept. Periodically over the years I adjusted my thinking and behaviors when I saw people around me who had traits I respected.


Now I find this tool less useful. I am seeking to be more "myself." I don't look at others as much as look within to who I wish to be and how I want to live. I identify qualities that I personally value and wish to grow in, define how living this way will lead to my overall personal goals of greater confidence and peace, and practice creative approaches to being more who I truly am underneath the effects of earlier life trauma. As I've healed the child within and matured in my relationships, I've discovered more of who the genuine and authentic me is and how to live more true to that.


Hope this helps.
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 07:28 AM
  #3
The tool I know of that helps with self esteem. Is looking in your eyes using a mirror, say I love i am beautiful, and other positive things you know about yourself. I am a great runner. I'm a helpful person. But look into your eyes and say it first person. I did it in high school a lot.

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