[nurse58]

I am very new to this world. I am new to this site and new to actually participating in online forums. I have visited quite a few websites but until today I never felt comfortable in joining and participating. I have spent the last hour just trying to figure out where to start with my new member post. Self esteem is a good place for me to start because I am really lacking in that department. I hope I got this right. I long for a non-judgemental community in which to learn and heal.

[Junerain]

(((((((((((nurse58))))

A non judgemental community in which to heal....that would be uswelcomewrite more.....

[Ebpm]

Hello, and welcome nurse58! ;-) happy you decided to join us!

This website is amazing, and I know you'll find it helpful in all sorts of ways!

[LittleDora]

Ahah, I know how you feel nurse58, it took me at least an hour of staring at over ten topics to pick where to start.
----------------
This topic is very helpful and it seems out of the three genters I can find myself being both the imposer and loser, depending on who I'm around at the time.I really wish I could act more freely around others though, but sometimes I found forcing smiles to force myself into something (that i'm originaly frightened to do) will end up leading to a real smile.It's good to risk a little at times, no matter what the situation is.You may not get the results you hoped for, but it's bad to neglect the other good ones coming from what you're doing at the time.

[broken_hearted]

Hi DocJohn,

I need help. I'm lost. I am ashamed to be in public. Many times when I am out I end up stopping what I am doing, become paralized in fear of people staring at me thinking how fat I am, how old I am, how ugly I am, etc... that for several mintues I can't move. I panic and self talk myself into leaving the cart and walk out so I can go home. I have these thoughts "what was I thinking going out in public?" ..... "I should of known better than to leave the house"...... "omg, look at me, I'm so fat." ..... etc.. I know the world does not revolve around me. I do, but I know people "people watch" and I'm so afraid they are looking at me saying horrible things about me. I go into panic attacks often over this. If I am with someone when I go out I am always asking why people are staring at me and ask if I look fat or ugly or whatever.......

A little back ground.... I am a child abuse adult survivor. I literally should not be alive. I had many horrific relationships where I was nearly killed. I am on my 3rd marriage which was extremely abusive at first but has stopped for the most part. I have been compared to other women by men in my life and also in my current marriage. I feel I can never measure up. I feel like I am nothing. Just learned my husband is ADHD which I suspected for a long time. He is not trying to make an effort in learning skills to help the situation. I however am in counseling and working hard on my own issues. I've tried things to help my self esteem but nothing has worked. I have to go out tomorrow and I am already in a panic about what to wear that can hide me. I don't look down or wear my sun glasses because it makes me feel I can't be seen.

Can someone please help me? I feel the only good thing in my life are my children from my 1st marriage. They are amazing and are married to wonderful spouses. They are why I keep going on in life. I love them so much.

I'm sorry for rambling. thank you for listening. God Bless.......

[wantstobe]

Well, I don't know what went wrong in my life, but I have problems with self esteem. It's weird because pretty much everyone I meet likes me a lot. I'm very friendly and get along well with others. I know I'm a good person. But-I don't like to be alone. I'm very self destructive and I have abused my body so badly over the years with drugs and alcohol and knives. I know I need to change and I want to change, I just don't know how or where to begin. I am glad I found this forum, it is giving me a place to start. Thank you.

[dreamweaver79]

Thanks for this forum. I have been struggling with low self esteem/worth for much of my life. Now if I can stop beating myself up, that would be great! Tx

[Aashlin]

Am havin trouble to take the step.... I donno wats wrong everything that seems helpful makes me run away

[Aashlin]

I think i m gonna go shouldnt have tried this sorry guys n u all r doin gr8

[Zachrey]

Hi DocJohn,

Just joined up with psychcentral and took a bunch of quizzes that were quite interesting!

I tried to take the self esteem quiz at :
cl1 dot psychtests dot com/take_test.php?idRegTest=3125

I answered all the questions and then clicked on "submit" or "score test" and nothing happened! Not good for someone with low self esteem, eh? ;-D

I have Windows 7 64 bit on an ASUS laptop with Google CHrome browser. Everyting is up-to-date as far as I know... Is there a bug on the webpage?

Thanks!
Zac

[QUOTE=DocJohn;75719]Before you can begin to improve your self-esteem you must first believe that you can change it. Change doesn't necessarily happen quickly or easily, but it can happen. You are not powerless! Once you have accepted, or are at least willing to entertain the possibility that you are not powerless, there are three steps you can take to begin to change your self-esteem:

* Step 1: Rebut the Inner Critic
* Step 2: Practice Self-Nurturing
* Step 3: Get Help from Others

[mduncanmoore]

This is an awesome and much needed forum for people today!
So many people compare themselves to what the media portrays the successful, or beautiful person to be and lose sight of their inner greatness and inner and outer beauty.
Self-Esteem is vital for people to live a happy life!

Thank you. I need all the help I can get.

[deneane]

i hope i get the help i need from this.i dont know what to do anymoore.

[AzureRain]

Originally Posted by DocJohn

* Step 1: Rebut the Inner Critic
* Step 2: Practice Self-Nurturing
* Step 3: Get Help from Others

Enjoy the forum and remember, be good and support each other!
DocJohn

What is / how do you: "Rebut the Inner Critic"

[Junerain]

As far as rebut-ing one's inner critic, I feel this thread was one of PC's best on the issue. I hope you get a lot out of it!

http://forums.psychcentral.com/showt...ve+distortions

Hi everyone, I'm new to this thread. I have suffered from issues with low self esteem since I was 11. I was bullied a lot by my peers growing up. It wasn't so bad in h.s, but by then, the damage was done. My parents were also very critical of me growing up at times, and they still are. My younger sister has also been mean to me most of the time growing up. I'm a little more confident than I used to be, and my self-esteem is better now, but it's still a little on the low end at times.

I never had that many friends. Right now I only have three and a few online friends. My husband is emotionally and verbally abusive, so that doesn't help with my main issue which is depression and anxiety. I'm on meds for both issues. I'm hoping that I can learn how to develop a better self-esteem on here.

You can call me Angie.

*Angie*

[bluewings]

Had joined the Daily Challenge at challenge.meyouhealth.com suggestion by docjohn and I enjoy seeing what new challenge is instore for me each morning, had just earned 25 tokens to purchase a track of my own choice so selected Strengthening Self Esteem...should check it out

Originally Posted by DocJohn

Before you can begin to improve your self-esteem you must first believe that you can change it. Change doesn't necessarily happen quickly or easily, but it can happen. You are not powerless! Once you have accepted, or are at least willing to entertain the possibility that you are not powerless, there are three steps you can take to begin to change your self-esteem:

* Step 1: Rebut the Inner Critic
* Step 2: Practice Self-Nurturing
* Step 3: Get Help from Others

Enjoy the forum and remember, be good and support each other!
DocJohn

Very hopeful of this entire idea website forum...
Fingers crossed for improvement finally, after years and years of trying and failing, i was already giving up when this site came to my notice...
Lets hope this helps

[Floralies]

Thank you so much for this group. I need it so much. My low self-esteem started as a child in the early development years. I am now 50. I am constantly second guessing everything I say and do. I am constantly beating myself up. I am constantly seeking approval. The list gos on and on.

[SeekerOfLife]

Trying to figure out the bottom line to all this.
I have low self esteem, poor assertiveness, depression, anxiety, ADHD, OCD. So what underlies all of this? Or.....is it different for different people?
I find myself chasing each issue for a time. Then, feel like I am chasing the wrong thing. So, the chase begins anew.
I am in therapy. My therapist and I set goals for me to work on. Right now the goals are for better self esteem and improved assertiveness.
Not sure if I am going in the right direction--just like these wee folks below my words.