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#1
Jan 19, 2010, 12:58 PM
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Not sure about this... but today I have an odd emotion.
It is not hate for the abuser. It is not longing for what was lost. It is not anger really... although I have felt my fair shair of that about the latest flashback. It is like a putrid color which can't be described. It is the unknown gunk in the bottom of an unwashed glass. I work and try to stay focused. I am not crying - even though a tough lump remains in the back of my throat. This place is not good. Not bad. Not sure what it is...
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#2
Jan 19, 2010, 12:59 PM
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I hope you get some clarity on this..........
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#3
Jan 19, 2010, 05:16 PM
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Not sure if your post is just saying how you feel, or if you want suggestions as to possible names for this feeling?
Quote:
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#4
Jan 19, 2010, 06:16 PM
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I was kinda wanting a name for it - T likes feeling words :-) LOL
But also wanted to know if others felt this with trauma work and what they had to say about it?
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#5
Jan 19, 2010, 07:06 PM
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hmmm,..well when I read the words you use to describe it, the word revulsion comes to mind. But when I associate the words specifically with the idea of trauma, strangely I don't get a word, but a creepy sensation in my shoulders/neck/back of head area...how odd. I have no name for that!
Sometimes I think our bodies just remember feelings we almost have to invent new words for... |
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#6
Jan 19, 2010, 07:09 PM
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Ectoplasm color?
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#7
Jan 19, 2010, 08:59 PM
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Ripley - you just about nail it I think. This is indeed the aftermath of a very bad first memory recall flashback I had Friday night. It has left me with .... this .... odd sensation. Thank you for helping me describe it.
Futz - you are just too funny :-)
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#8
Jan 19, 2010, 09:09 PM
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My pleasure
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#9
Jan 20, 2010, 03:12 PM
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((((((((((Wpowers)))))))))))
I too have stumbled upon many emotions in the recovery process that just don't have names, although what your saying reminds me of when I first stumbled upon my sadness, it wasn't bad, it wasn't good, it just was, I was really just profoundly sad for reasons I couldn't explain. Sometimes the best thing to do for it as T has told me is to just, experience it, and let it be, sort of flow through it and stay safe. Sending many peaceful hugs to you Typo |
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#10
Jan 20, 2010, 08:00 PM
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Hmmmmm.....
Feeling words..... It sounds like your saying it's neutral, but with a side of sadness? I think this can be a beneficial place to be. When you get to a more neutral feeling, your emotional mind and rational mind can blend more into your wise mind. Does it possibly feel uncomfortable because you are not used to a more neutral type feeling? Kind of like a new pair of shoes. You love them....but they just don't feel quite right till they get broken in more. Hope this helped a bit. 
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