[suzzie]

i have trouble with time. not loosing it. but putting it into context. i have trouble often with remembering when things happened. if it was an hour ago, a day, week or year. sometimes it was yesterday and i dont have the faintest clue of when it was. i remember what it was. just cant figure out when.

[Leed]

I have that trouble too. It's very frustrating!! And it can be embarrassing too -- people think I'm nuts!!

Alot of this problem stems from some of the medication I'm taking. I'm a chronic pain patient so I take alot of pain meds, but also take meds for depression. Plus I'm a recovering alcoholic and I've pickled some brain cells from years of drinking. And something I didn't know until recently, but chronic pain causes brain damage!!! So i haven't got a chance in heck! I'll be a slobbering moron before long. LOL

Seriously tho, I think medication has a lot to do with it. If you're on any psych meds, that's probably the cause. Talk with your doc about it -- maybe he can help/explain it better. God bless. Hugs, Lee

[Sannah]

Are you dissociating a lot through out the day? If so I would think that it would make it hard to keep track of time.

[suzzie]

leed, youre right it is embarrassing. and the meds affecting it is a good point too. but i dont take them. never have. the chronic pain causing damage i didnt know, wow.

sannah, it could be as i do tend drift alot during the day. but has gotten worse since i started t.

[Sannah]

I'll bet your drifting away has increased since starting therapy. This is typical.

[Can't Stop Crying]

I dissociate more after a tough T session - I think it's just a coping skill we learned young and continue to use when things get to be too much. It is frustrating and embarrassing... I try to look at it like it is protecting me from being too overwhelmed.

[suzzie]

that is true csc. and a good perspective too. i have dissociated through every session so far. and in between. is there any way to control it.

[Open Eyes]

You know I am not really sure, I think that it may be also caused from stress. And it may be a way of the brain taking a time out if it happens in a session.
You know its funny because my therapist asked me that once afer a session. And the funny thing is that during the session which had been a really long one, he asked me if I knew how long we had been talking and I didn't really know.

So, it was strange because he pointed it out during the session and then he asked me later after the session and he didn't realize that yes that is exactly what I was doing during the session that made him comment on it.

I don't know if that makes sense but it didn't make sense to me either that day.
It wasn't until the second time it happened that I answered, yes, I lost track of time during the session and you already asked me about that twice in our last session.

He finally got it.

I think that when we start looking and trying to deal with the PTSD that comes from abuse, yes, we focus on that and lose track of time. I also think that because we are focusing on different times in our past along with trying to deal with our day to day stuff, we do get confused. I have noticed that since starting therapy and working on my issues. Too much time travel going on.

Sorry to hear about your struggle with pain management Leed. You have a lot on your plate.

I do have to agree with Leed too about medications. I am taking clonazapam and I am really trying to cut back as I do see short term memory loss and I don't really like that side effect.

[Can't Stop Crying]

Originally Posted by suzzie

that is true csc. and a good perspective too. i have dissociated through every session so far. and in between. is there any way to control it.

Try to use your senses to keep yourself grounded...listen to the sounds around you, touch something familiar, look at something to remind yourself you're in the present. Sometimes it helps to tell yourself I'm safe now, that was the past...

Sorry this is so tough for you. Trauma work can be overwhelming. I hope you keep working on it though, even through the tough times!

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by suzzie

i have dissociated through every session so far. and in between. is there any way to control it.

I think that it could help you if you have a sense of empowerment and control. If I understand correctly, you leave everything up to your T and don't contribute due to fear? If you could learn to contribute more to your session you could gain a sense of empowerment and control and I think that this would help with the dissociation.

[suzzie]

i really am trying to do this. (contribute more) but i get so anxious there its wonder i dont spontaneously up and run. i have given her some short answers lately tho. good to know contributing helps it.

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by suzzie

i really am trying to do this. (contribute more) but i have given her some short answers lately tho. good to know contributing helps it.

This is a great start!