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#1
Dec 12, 2011, 10:14 PM
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My father was told by doctors that because of my mom's problems, they could not have children. nine months later I surprised them both. My mom called me her little surprise. My Dad called me their worst mistake. If I could not live up to his expectations, He would beat me until I could barely move. He then would tell me that he was not through with me beating me more. I prayed for death to come quickly but it never came.
I was told that I should not be stupid like he was and get married having children. If I were not born mom and dad would be able to have a life. I was his loser, disappointment and burden. I never was able to get close to him. he said hugging was for sissies and any crying he'd give me something to cry about and crying is for sissies. to be continued... Last edited by darkpurplesecrets; Dec 13, 2011 at 12:34 AM. Reason: added trigger icon.... |
 Open Eyes, SophiaG, Ygrec23
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#2
Dec 13, 2011, 10:31 AM
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Hi dwight, welcome to PC. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. I'll keep listening..........
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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#3
Dec 13, 2011, 10:34 AM
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I'm here and listening as well. You weren't a mistake. No matter what he told you. I hope you realize this.
__________________
In depression . . . faith in deliverance, in ultimate restoration, is absent. The pain is unrelenting, and what makes the condition intolerable is the...feeling felt as truth...that no remedy will come -- not in a day, an hour, a month, or a minute. . . . It is hopelessness even more than pain that crushes the soul.-William Styron |
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#4
Dec 13, 2011, 11:16 AM
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Your obviously describing a man who totally lacked any ability to raise a child approprately, any child would not flourish with this man, even the most intellegent capable human on earth. This is important for you to understand and make sure that you conclude that you are in no way responsible for any of his lack towards you.
What role did your mother play in this atmosphere and did she make any efforts to compensate for this worthless abusive parent? (((Hugs))) Open Eyes |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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