[toesquasher]

I've got to write about this......but it may trigger, so be careful if you choose to read further.
It happened a year ago this past Wednesday and I'm still getting over the trauma of it.
If you've read any of my other posts, you'd see a theme. Pretty much all my posts (and those posted by my alters) have been tummy related. And, yet again, this one is the same. Much of my trauma history has to do with unwanted, invasive tummy touch. This time, it was at the hands of a doctor.
Due to a physical disability, I empty my bladder through a hole in my tummy. So, whenever I have urological problems, the tummy is involved. Last summer I started having complications when I went to empty my bladder. I could no longer insert the tube to drain my bladder. so, I went to my urologist. I was told the procedure would be minimally invasive and last 5 minutes. Boy, were they wrong! It was over an hour of being poked, prodded, pushed on and touched. I ended up with a semi-permanent tube through the hole in my tummy. It was suppose to be there a whole week to help re-open the hole. That all happened on a Tuesday afternoon. By Thursday night I was calling the cops on myself because I was so overwhelmed. Having the tube inside my tummy just brought back everything I'd ever gone through. I couldn't deal with the emotional pain of it all. So, I was admitted to a psych ward. The nurse assigned to me worked with me so I wouldn't pull the tube out early like I wanted to. That lasted until sometime early Sunday morning. I woke up to find the tube out of my tummy. I'm assuming an alter pulled it out while I was sleeping. I have no recollection of doing it myself. Immediately, I felt both relieved and scared. I was glad to have the wretched tube out of my tummy but scared I'd have to redo that terrible procedure again. Thankfully, I didn't have to go through it again and I haven't had any problems since then when I go to empty my bladder. Hopefully I will never have a repeat of the procedure. But I'm still dealing with the trauma of the whole experience................
Just had to get that all out. Thanks for reading.
Toes

[DePressMe]

toes, yes, I've read your other post about your tummy issues. I feel for you. I know it's difficult to go through the physical and emotional turmoil caused by past trauma. I also have many triggers that set me off. It's not pleasant and, yes, I've ended up in the psychward because of them too. I'm glad you have been able to empty your bladder without any more problems. take care.......D.