[ThisWayOut]

I've been dealing with the side-effects of my CAS and SA a lot lately, but haven't really been to someplace to talk about it. Yesterday I started (again) with an SA therapist. It was just an intake, but it was a long one. And I didn't tell her about the one thing I really feel the need to address... so now I'm obsessing over it and it has me feeling all raw and vulnerable. Why is it that talking about it (or not talking about it) can make it so much worse when I've been dealing with the effects forever? ugh!

[JadeAmethyst]

Yes, I get this too I feel like catch 22, bad before, worse after...

[ThisWayOut]

She had said it would "get worse before it gets better" but I didn't think it would start getting worse so soon... totally a catch 22.

[ThisWayOut]

some days I remember it in insane detail, other days I can't figure out what I even get triggered about. Does anyone else go through times like that, where you remember a lot some of the time, and barely anything other times? I went from remembering it all just a few days ago, to not really being in touch with any of it right now... I re-read some of my journaling from Friday and I feel like I'm reading someone else's story. I know it's my own, but the connection to it is lost. I guess it's good because it doesn't effect me as badly. It's just weird to be so disconnected again.

[tinyrabbit]

Yep, totally hearing you on this. It will get better.