[Neptune83]

We just moved, like three weeks ago to a house which is fab and we want to make it our home until we can afford to buy our own home.
I was abused by three men when I was a teenager and I eventually reported it when I was 19/20. One didn't even get charged, and out of the two who ended up in court only one went to prison being found guilty of only two of the four charges, he got released after just 7 months. So much for our justice system.
The one who was found 'not guilty' I've realised lives right around the corner from us and he walks past every day a few times a day. He could easily walk a different route. I lost my temper the other day and basically told him to walk a different way, although perhaps not as polite as that. I've spoken to police and asked them about a restraining order but because technically he's not doing anything wrong they won't. I've spoken to solicitors and asked about an injunction but they can't do that either. We can't move again, we were lucky to find this house. I don't know what to do. I hate having this rubbed in my face all the time, it was hard enough before. People say I should 'just get over it'. It infuriates me that they've wrecked my life and caused me endless problems not just for me but my family, my relationship with my husbsnd etc I'm terrified he'll tell the other one where I am because he found me once before so I had to move because he'd threatened to kill me if I ever 'told'.
The police said they can have a word with him then if it carries on I may be able to do something on grounds of harassment.
I don't know why I'm posting this. To vent frustration and perhaps see if any of you have experienced similar I guess.

[BLUEDOVE]

Not experienced this,but meanwhile,please try and
be COMPASSIONATE with dear self to ease upset.
God Bless,
BLUEDOVE

[gayleggg]

It is good sometimes just to be able to vent you feelings somewhere safe. I'm sorry you are having to be reminded of you asault by seeing this man. I know it must be a nightmare for you and your family.

[Themeanreds]

What you describe sounds like he is demonstrating stalking behavior. I would keep a journal of every time he walks by your house noting the day and time. If you are able to show a pattern, and that he passes your house not out of necessity, or an excessive amount of time, given your history with him, this might be enough to get a restraining order.

In my state, there are laws to protect individuals from stalking. I do not know what the laws are in the U.K. regarding this issue. I think that you have every right to feel the way that you do, and no one should tell you to "get over it". Hopefully under U.K. law, once you demonstrate that he seems to be doing this in a harassing manner, you will be able to get some sort of restraining order. I also think that you should make a police report weekly detailing the number of times he passes by, the times of day etc. It will lay a foundation for hopefully getting a restraining order.

[Neptune83]

Thank you.
He always walks past when he knows I'm going to be out here. I smoke and I don't do it indoors because I have kids and I always have my last one around half seven before my two youngest need their nighttime feeds. So it's like he knows I'm going to be out here and could easily walk a different way as there are several different roads he could walk through, he certainly doesn't have to walk past here. I think he gets off on upsetting me.