[lightcatcher]

Hi all, just wanting others advice or anything really. How do you verbalise what happened to you to others? (Esp CSA stuff)

[transient]

This is a good question. I still have a really hard time with this.
As a lot of people advise, it's good to write down what happened before you plan to tell someone. If you can't physically tell them, you can also hand them the paper with your writing.

If you're not sure what exactly happened to you, tell them that. Maybe you could do some research beforehand, or talk to someone on the rainn.org hotline and they can help you figure it out. I went there for help when I wasn't sure if something I experienced qualified as csa and they helped me figure out the words and process it a little, so I could talk to my T about it later.

What helps me when I talk about it in therapy is to hold something in my hand like a rock or silly putty. The energy from my discomfort and stress goes into whatever I'm squeezing, so it gets a little easier for the words to come out.

[lightcatcher]

Originally Posted by transient

This is a good question. I still have a really hard time with this.
As a lot of people advise, it's good to write down what happened before you plan to tell someone. If you can't physically tell them, you can also hand them the paper with your writing.

If you're not sure what exactly happened to you, tell them that. Maybe you could do some research beforehand, or talk to someone on the rainn.org hotline and they can help you figure it out. I went there for help when I wasn't sure if something I experienced qualified as csa and they helped me figure out the words and process it a little, so I could talk to my T about it later.

What helps me when I talk about it in therapy is to hold something in my hand like a rock or silly putty. The energy from my discomfort and stress goes into whatever I'm squeezing, so it gets a little easier for the words to come out.

Thanks for the reply!
I know alot of what happened to me, its just to say it out loud seems so hideous. I will try writing it down before too. Its words like genitals that I just cant say out loud. Ugh I just want to run away from it all.

[sweepy62]

Im having a hard time as well, I cant say words related to csa, my t will work on that eventually, for right now, I write it, but she wont read it, she wants me to verbaize it. I have stick figure drawings, she looks at them, but also wants to process them, so needless to say this will be very long term for me.

[suzzie]

ive told some through poems. but its still hard. especially discussing them. which i cant.

[HazelGirl]

I don't have CSA, but I write, draw, paint and sing (songs that express my inner feelings) to express my past. I have troubles talking about it sometimes, so I use other methods to help me understand my responses and reactions to things.

[BPD Ghost]

You don't have to go into detail if you don't want to. If you must go into detail you can use nicknames like "privates"
I don't think you should talk about it unless you are comfortable. Unless if course it's for court. If it's therapy then you can say you aren't ready. You will know when you are ready. You are not expected to tell anyone else, especially not in detail. If it's a friend, you can just generalize it by saying you were sexually abused. You have every right to say "it's too personal or traumatic to talk about right now"